stevie_23 Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 Ok. Here’s the deal. I have been with my real life long term girlfriend for 11.5 years. Before I met my ex (LDR / MM 61 year old from another country) I thought I was gay. Now I don’t know what I am, but I don’t mind because I don’t require labels on myself. I am more interested and open to the person and not really restricted to what gender they are I guess. And no, we have never met in person, my ex and I. He is so far away, neither of us could leave our partners to come and visit the other even if we had enough money to do so, etc. As far as his wife “letting” him have his fun online? She really doesn’t condone it, but she just doesn’t ever want to talk about it. Even before any of this happened, their relationship was based on domestic partnership, him cooking and cleaning, providing stability for her, and they never discuss anything of any deeper meaning. No feelings. Just chit chat stuff or about her work problems. Anyway, I do know counseling would definitely benefit me, for sure. I was going to say we should get back to the original point of this thread!! lol
Author neveragain34 Posted January 16, 2013 Author Posted January 16, 2013 Ok. Here’s the deal. I have been with my real life long term girlfriend for 11.5 years. Before I met my ex (LDR / MM 61 year old from another country) I thought I was gay. Now I don’t know what I am, but I don’t mind because I don’t require labels on myself. I am more interested and open to the person and not really restricted to what gender they are I guess. And no, we have never met in person, my ex and I. He is so far away, neither of us could leave our partners to come and visit the other even if we had enough money to do so, etc. As far as his wife “letting” him have his fun online? She really doesn’t condone it, but she just doesn’t ever want to talk about it. Even before any of this happened, their relationship was based on domestic partnership, him cooking and cleaning, providing stability for her, and they never discuss anything of any deeper meaning. No feelings. Just chit chat stuff or about her work problems. Anyway, I do know counseling would definitely benefit me, for sure. I was going to say we should get back to the original point of this thread!! lol You could possibly still be gay since you don't know if there would have been any physical attraction with the MM had you met in person. As you said, labels arent important; just something to think about. By saying she "let him" have his fun, I didn't mean she condoned it, I just meant that an online affair isn't always enough to end a marriage or relationship. I'm sure their relationship had much more meaning than he told you; they all say similar things. Either way, it's best that you aren't with anymore. You can you this time now to focus on you.
HonestNeurotic Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 You ruined his life? Good for you! Yes, I am being sarcastic. Though I think it's great that someone that is NPD gave this power to YOU. The power to ruin his life. I feel really bad for his wife. I feel bad for any woman that feels that she has to have an emotional relationship to define her worth in the world. 3
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