Adelle Posted January 15, 2013 Posted January 15, 2013 So I just started going out with this guy i recently met back up with. We hung out as friends and over time and we became more. I really like this guy and when we are together i feel a mixture of bliss and happiness along with insecurity, which causes me to close up and be shy. I find myself getting anxious in regards to him because i want to see him more. We see each other a couple times a week and i find myself missing him more and more when we are apart. I haven't said anything to him about this because i don't want to scare him away or perhaps be judged. I do understand that i had or is having a problem with co-dependency issues which has led me to stay in unhealthy relationships. I've have been working on this and with therapy and time i came to terms and broke it off with my X who was very neglectful and abusive. I realized that for years i have pushed my feelings and desires aside in order to work things out with my now X b/f and do not want to make the same mistakes.. I don't want to appear or be clingy but often times i feel sad and alone and now i find myself getting anxious awaiting his text or call. I also find myself unable to talk to him about my inner feelings. I do understand that the basis to a healthy relationship is honesty and to be open about your feelings. I was always good in that regard but now I find it hard for me to be that again. I guess what it comes down to is that i don't totally know if what i'm doing with this guy is normal with the whole only seeing each other couple days a week or if it's just me. Usually when yo first date somebody there's a "honey moon period" where you see one another everyday or ever other day and filled with tons of intimacy. Who knows maybe it's just what i'm used to.
Leegh Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 A couple of times a week is fine, especially if you both work. Even once a week is fine in the very early stages of dating. I would not say anything to him, but just see what happens. I don't know where you live, but if you live in an area where it is cold now, hopefully in the summer you can go out more when there are more things to do when it is warmer. In addition, if your relationship progresses, you and he can take trips together.
Samilia Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 So I just started going out with this guy i recently met back up with. We hung out as friends and over time and we became more. I really like this guy and when we are together i feel a mixture of bliss and happiness along with insecurity, which causes me to close up and be shy. I find myself getting anxious in regards to him because i want to see him more. We see each other a couple times a week and i find myself missing him more and more when we are apart. I haven't said anything to him about this because i don't want to scare him away or perhaps be judged. I do understand that i had or is having a problem with co-dependency issues which has led me to stay in unhealthy relationships. I've have been working on this and with therapy and time i came to terms and broke it off with my X who was very neglectful and abusive. I realized that for years i have pushed my feelings and desires aside in order to work things out with my now X b/f and do not want to make the same mistakes.. I don't want to appear or be clingy but often times i feel sad and alone and now i find myself getting anxious awaiting his text or call. I also find myself unable to talk to him about my inner feelings. I do understand that the basis to a healthy relationship is honesty and to be open about your feelings. I was always good in that regard but now I find it hard for me to be that again. I guess what it comes down to is that i don't totally know if what i'm doing with this guy is normal with the whole only seeing each other couple days a week or if it's just me. Usually when yo first date somebody there's a "honey moon period" where you see one another everyday or ever other day and filled with tons of intimacy. Who knows maybe it's just what i'm used to. I would fill the gaps in between seeing him with activities. Could be gym, shopping, going to the movies, etc... Also, it can only be good for the relationship as well.
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