justwhoiam Posted January 18, 2013 Posted January 18, 2013 (edited) Is it normal to feel upset after your lover goes/had sex? If you're in love with him, I think it's understandable. When you're in love, you want to share. And having his needs fulfilled and soon after going out the door wouldn't be most women's cup of tea. Not to split hairs, but you didn't say "we made love". You said "he had sex". That makes me think that you were not fully involved in what he was doing. The moment he told you he was on his way to work and came to say hello and be with you for a bit, you knew he had to go to work. You must have noticed he didn't call in sick or anything. So you knew he was going to stay for a little bit only. He probably sort of planned to stay for like 40 minutes and ended up being with you for one hour and a half. Thus in his mind, it was probably terrific. It's understandable that he wanted to be with you alone instead of having a walk somewhere early in the morning. But it was not the best thing for you apparently. Deep down, you are questioning if he used you. Only you know if that is true or not. If similar things happened other times and left you empty. Wondering if I was good enough performance-wise, if my place was tidy/clean enough, whether he still found me as attractive with not much and hurried make-up on and when I was going to see him next. Are these feelings natural?! Yes. I guess so. You wonder if things were great maybe he was going to stay a bit more. I guess you are afraid of losing him. And you're in love with him. Worrying about being attractive enough and the house is tidy and pleasant to his eyes, all those elements make you look good for him, a perfect fit. Are you the perfect fit? You obviously want him to be all yours. Women tend to want to be perfect. But no one's perfect. Ever. The most worrying thing about your MM is understanding whether he's a jerk or not. And the thing you said about texting leaves me wondering. Maybe you're just a bit anxious as you fell for him really bad. But maybe he's just a jerk who - at 9 am - says I'll text you, and then you don't hear from him until like 6 pm. That can happen under given circumstances, but it should be an exception, not the rule. So now try to understand if you're just a passtime for him. If he's around just for sex, he's definitely not for you. Edited January 18, 2013 by justwhoiam 1
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