TheGuy000 Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 Hello, My (ex) girlfriend broke it off with me a couple weeks ago. We have been going out for 3 months. During holiday break, she went to visit her family out of state (we go to school together), and admitted to me that she contacted one of her past boyfriends and more or less confessed her love to him. Anyways, afterwards, a week passed (she was still out of state) and once again, she admitted to me that she was in contact with him again, and was confused on what to do (in terms of who to pick between me and that other guy). The next day, she broke it off, claiming that her feelings for him were too strong, and it wouldn't be fair / right for both of us to continue like this. They were together for about 3 years before they broke up due to distance. Now, they are back together. I guess it will again be a distance relationship for a couple of years since she is attending school in a different state. Anyways, I'm not completely sure of the reasons for the breakup. She has admitted to me that she really tried to forget about him, and when we are together, he is out of her mind. But I guess when she went to visit and we stayed apart for a couple of weeks, some of those feelings and thoughts came back, and were too overwhelming for her to just ignore them. She is a sweet girl, and tried to be nice about the whole thing. She apologized for the way things turned out, but in the end, she figured she would rather be with him than me. I know that 3 yr relationship is probably a lot meaningful than a 3 month one that we had, but I still can't put the pieces together as to why she went back to him. She admits that she enjoys spending time with me, but she felt more comfortable around her ex -- perhaps felt more comfortable when she envisioned having a future for him. I do not have many regrets in terms of my part in our relationship. I treated her well, made her laugh, spent time with her, helped her out with some of her projects/tasks, etc. She admitted that one flaw I had was that I reason a lot with her, which is kind of true. She admits that she feels like she has to walk on eggshells a bit around me, whereas her ex may have been more passive I suppose you could say. But I don't know, that's pretty much the only thing that I can think of that wasn't right. The thing is, it's been almost a couple weeks, and I still miss her quite a bit. I like her, and was quite excited to see her back from her trip. She told me that she will get back with her ex-boyfriend once he breaks it off with his current gf (he will wait for her to break it off with him). But overall, she seems to have taken a healthy approach to the whole thing - she has moved on and it seems like is having an easy time in getting back into the grooves of things with her life. The problem is that I haven't. I feel like it might've been good to breakup, as her feelings for him kept lingering. But, it is still difficult for me. What doesn't help is the fact that we are in the same graduate program, so I pretty much see her everyday, and most days will likely have some kind of interaction with her. And when I do, I start being reminded of how beautiful she looks, and how much I'd like to be with her. It is a bit pathetic, but true. Any advice concerning my dilemma? If I really wanted to, I suppose I could just show up to class, pay attention, go home, and leave it at that. But I will admit, it does feel nice to say hi to her here and there when I see her around. Thank you.
Author TheGuy000 Posted February 5, 2013 Author Posted February 5, 2013 Still not over her, but I am slowly healing. I wish we weren't classmates, it makes it so much more difficult to move on.
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