Hi everyone! Noob with a question on dating in your late-twenties...

[Le' Christophe]

Oh, you're an INFP. Hands down. It shows in your sentence structure and word use

 

INFP Profile

[Le' Christophe]

(HA! I hear ya there. My ex was an ENFJ. A sample conversation:

ME: "Let's drive to the mountains!"

HER: "Alright, here's what we're going to do: I have a plan for our WHOLE day..."

ME: "Nah, let's just make it up as we go!"

HER: "B-but...how will we know what we're going to do in advance??"

ME: "Look...a SQUIRREL! Let's follow it to see where it goes :D"

HER: *Facepalm*)

[Le' Christophe]

They are? I shouldn't be surprised...wonder how they train people at those?

 

Aye, I for one would love to live forever. Jeane Louise-Calment came pretty close though!

 

Jeanne Calment - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

[Els]

Oh, you're an INFP. Hands down. It shows in your sentence structure and word use

 

INFP Profile

 

Extremely interesting. I didn't mention it back then, but I did get INFP a fair bit more often than INTP. I browsed through your link, but didn't see anything about sentence structure and word use. Care to elaborate (via PM if you can and don't want to derail your thread)? I'm very curious.

[AlexDP]

(HA! I hear ya there. My ex was an ENFJ. A sample conversation:

ME: "Let's drive to the mountains!"

HER: "Alright, here's what we're going to do: I have a plan for our WHOLE day..."

ME: "Nah, let's just make it up as we go!"

HER: "B-but...how will we know what we're going to do in advance??"

ME: "Look...a SQUIRREL! Let's follow it to see where it goes :D"

HER: *Facepalm*)

 

Dude, you need to relax .

[Nightsky]

dude sign up for my class I just made up for you. Your Doctorate of dating awaits.

 

I also know the trick to being mainly. It involves facial hair and slapping women on the butt just right, some times in front of other people!

[charlietheginger]

As for that women leaving you for

The biker type.

 

My feeling is you were to good for her.

She probably thought you were to good

For her. Here you are a man that could

Give her the world on a silver platter and

What does she do hop on a motorcycle and

Ride off with another guy.

 

Imo you are much better off. Forget about her

Once you land a job as a professor you will

Meet female professors and other educated

women. Stay away from the crazy ones with

Low self esteem that tried to kill themselves.

Thats a redflag if you hear it stay far away.

You need to surround yourself with happy normal

People.

[Le' Christophe]

Extremely interesting. I didn't mention it back then, but I did get INFP a fair bit more often than INTP. I browsed through your link, but didn't see anything about sentence structure and word use. Care to elaborate (via PM if you can and don't want to derail your thread)? I'm very curious.

 

Ooh yes, I'd love to chat about this more with you! I'll send you a note - it's a subject I love talking about with people. I know it's a bit artificial to put people into 16 cookie-cutter shapes, since in reality human beings were formed with 7 billion cookie cutters But, it's still a nice way to explore people's similarities and differences I think.

 

 

As for that women leaving you for

The biker type.

 

My feeling is you were to good for her.

She probably thought you were to good

For her. Here you are a man that could

Give her the world on a silver platter and

What does she do hop on a motorcycle and

Ride off with another guy.

 

Imo you are much better off. Forget about her

Once you land a job as a professor you will

Meet female professors and other educated

women. Stay away from the crazy ones with

Low self esteem that tried to kill themselves.

Thats a redflag if you hear it stay far away.

You need to surround yourself with happy normal

People.

 

That's very kind of you to say, but she had extraordinary gifts and a very big heart...she just had other issues too. I don't know, for some reason I just really wanted to be able to help her through them *shrugs* But obviously people have to CHOOSE who they want to help them in their lives. I do miss her, but I figure if we are even just going to be friends again someday, she'll come back. And if she doesn't, we were never going to have much of a bond to begin with. In the meantime, I'll just meet other people with similar qualities, or different ones.

[Le' Christophe]

So here's something else I've been wondering on this note recently. I never went to high school - my parents had very unconventional theories, they switched me between elementary schools every couple years and then let me go to college from the time I was 12 onward.

 

Of course I was pretty enthused about the idea at the time, but in retrospect I can't help but wonder how things might have been different had I stayed at one elementary school, then gone on to high school from there like most people do. Sure my doctorate probably would have come a few years later than it did...but, I would have had the time to bond with a group of friends as a kid, really get to know them and grow up together. Probably would have started dating in high school, on the way between classes or sports team tryouts, someone to go to the prom with who you've known since you were kids together...like in all those teen soap operas, haha. Just sounds kinda nice

 

Do you think it's possible to have a similar experience in college though? I mean, it won't be with people you've grown up together with, that's something I know I'll never get to experience now...but I mean, even college students are still growing in some ways, so if you make friends in college and get to know them for years you can still 'grow up together' in a sense, right? After all, you can't dwell on things you didn't go through, all you can do is look ahead and find ways to have similar experiences if you can.

 

For those of you who've gone to both, do you think the college and high school dating scenes are REALLY all that different, in terms of the feel and experience overall?

Edited February 16, 2013 by Le' Christophe

[ScreamingTrees]

So here's something else I've been wondering on this note recently. I never went to high school - my parents had very unconventional theories, they switched me between elementary schools every couple years and then let me go to college from the time I was 12 onward.

 

Of course I was pretty enthused about the idea at the time, but in retrospect I can't help but wonder how things might have been different had I stayed at one elementary school, then gone on to high school from there like most people do. Sure my doctorate probably would have come a few years later than it did...but, I would have had the time to bond with a group of friends as a kid, really get to know them and grow up together. Probably would have started dating in high school, on the way between classes or sports team tryouts, someone to go to the prom with who you've known since you were kids together...like in all those teen soap operas, haha. Just sounds kinda nice

 

Do you think it's possible to have a similar experience in college though? I mean, it won't be with people you've grown up together with, that's something I know I'll never get to experience now...but I mean, even college students are still growing in some ways, so if you make friends in college and get to know them for years you can still 'grow up together' in a sense, right? After all, you can't dwell on things you didn't go through, all you can do is look ahead and find ways to have similar experiences if you can.

 

For those of you who've gone to both, do you think the college and high school dating scenes are REALLY all that different, in terms of the feel and experience overall?

 

If you have basic social skills and can read people, you're not screwed. Whether you only start to garner flirting/relationship skills now or have already built a foundation back then, it's irrelevant.

 

If you meet someone who is somewhat patient and can be understanding, there should be no reason why you couldn't quickly "catch up" to them where you're both on the same page emotionally and mentally.. It's not really a crutch, it just is what it is, given the circumstances of your life.

 

Nothing wrong with it, so don't act as if your lack of experience is something to be ashamed of, it doesn't define you or somehow make you a lesser being. I'm sure (or hope) you don't believe that, though..

 

If anything, someone who is in college will likely be more mature and wiser than their younger counterpart, which will be a bonus for you, as you probably were more mature than their younger counterparts when you were their age.

 

Someone in college, if you're any good at discerning one's general personality and temperament and morals, would be a better match for you.

Edited February 16, 2013 by ScreamingTrees

[Weezy1973]

I think the best rule of thumb always is to be yourself - from your posts in this thread it seems like you're genuinely looking for a relationship and not just to sleep around with randoms. Being extroverted will help you in this case as you can put yourself out there more naturally. An extroverted, bubbly gal would probably suit you well.

 

I'm an INTJ by the way...apparently pretty rare...

[Els]

Ooh yes' date=' I'd love to chat about this more with you! I'll send you a note - it's a subject I love talking about with people. I know it's a bit artificial to put people into 16 cookie-cutter shapes, since in reality human beings were formed with 7 billion cookie cutters But, it's still a nice way to explore people's similarities and differences I think.[/quote']

 

I definitely agree with this. I think Jungian typology can be a useful guideline, but it certainly isn't the end-all-be-all of human psychology. It's still extremely interesting though. I'm not actually sure if you can PM yet with your number of posts, I just realized... hopefully you can!

 

So here's something else I've been wondering on this note recently. I never went to high school - my parents had very unconventional theories, they switched me between elementary schools every couple years and then let me go to college from the time I was 12 onward.

 

Of course I was pretty enthused about the idea at the time, but in retrospect I can't help but wonder how things might have been different had I stayed at one elementary school, then gone on to high school from there like most people do. Sure my doctorate probably would have come a few years later than it did...but, I would have had the time to bond with a group of friends as a kid, really get to know them and grow up together. Probably would have started dating in high school, on the way between classes or sports team tryouts, someone to go to the prom with who you've known since you were kids together...like in all those teen soap operas, haha. Just sounds kinda nice

 

Personally, if I ever have a kid, even if he was extremely gifted and 'can' progress quicker, I would give him the chance to go through school normally. You learn a lot from socializing with peers your age, and none of that should be downplayed. Academic advancement isn't everything. I'd only pull him out if he was miserable in school for longer than the normal adjustment period or constantly getting bullied (both of which do tend to happen to unusually bright kids in some schools).

 

Do you think it's possible to have a similar experience in college though? I mean, it won't be with people you've grown up together with, that's something I know I'll never get to experience now...but I mean, even college students are still growing in some ways, so if you make friends in college and get to know them for years you can still 'grow up together' in a sense, right? After all, you can't dwell on things you didn't go through, all you can do is look ahead and find ways to have similar experiences if you can.

 

For those of you who've gone to both, do you think the college and high school dating scenes are REALLY all that different, in terms of the feel and experience overall?

 

Definitely possible to have a similar college experience. Most of us start from scratch at college, we don't usually have HS friends to fall back on there. Lots of people also lose touch with their HS friends after everyone goes to different places.

 

My college dating experience was much better than my high school dating experience because I was in a Girls' High School.

 

You've graduated college though, I thought?

[silvermercy]

A couple of years ago I finished my PhD in Biochemistry at your age, 28.

You have these huge advantages over me:

- you are male and the double standard in age favours you (I'm female),

- you are a SMART male (you are very lucky again, as apparently not many men like women smarter than them. Watch the "House Bunny" film if you can, you'll see! lol),

- you're a medic doctor. (I'm biomed doctor in research. In other words, the poor kind of doctor. lol)

- once established you'll probably stay in one place (up until now I had to change cities every now and then, dependent on funding availability)

 

Long story short, you have all the advantages compared to other PhD scientists. If you fail it will be a big surprise.

Edited February 16, 2013 by silvermercy