sinner Posted August 20, 2004 Posted August 20, 2004 I went out on a date tonight and we were getting along really great. He was super smart, had a good job and has been working on his PhD. We were having a great time, laughing and the conversation was coming really easily. Shamen, we're not talking about a child molester, convicted felon, abuser (of drugs or women) or someone who is stupid (or even of average intelligence) or unattractive. He's a guy who, years ago, had the equipment and ability to get hard on cue. Which is no small feat. He hurt no one. All he did was earn a living. Look at the man as he is, today. Judge him for who he is, and what he does, now. Not yesterday.
Author shamen Posted August 20, 2004 Author Posted August 20, 2004 Originally posted by havNfun wow you may regret passing this up when you get to be mid 30's etc. He's getting very educated, you said he was a gentleman, and most likely he can fqeck like a rock star and also prolly hung like king kong, - and will perhaps make an incredible legitimate living for a family. How known of a name is he? give him another chance and get some great sex out of the deal at least. I AM in my mid 30s! Yes, he is an educated gentleman. F*** like a rock star? No doubt that he probably has some skills! Really tall and a beautiful body that stood out beneath his clothes. A runner's body. I have no idea how much of a name he is. I asked him for the name and he told me. I'm too embarrassed to go check it out as it sounds like it could be too common. Who knows if he even gave me the real name? Great sex out of the deal? I don't know. Am I ready for that? I haven't slept with anyone besides my ex bf in the last 3 1/2, almost 4 years!
sinner Posted August 20, 2004 Posted August 20, 2004 Then send me the tapes Come on, Spock! I'm trying to be serious!!!
EC Posted August 20, 2004 Posted August 20, 2004 OMG whats the name c'mon spill it spill it.........lol
She's Come Undone Posted August 20, 2004 Posted August 20, 2004 shamen, I know you have something to tell him as well. Would you be hurt if he judged your past based on that? Would you be hurt if he didn't accept you "issues" and all? It's a tough call, but matches are too infrequent to brush off so quickly. I know you're still weighing it.
Author shamen Posted August 20, 2004 Author Posted August 20, 2004 Originally posted by sinner Shamen, we're not talking about a child molester, convicted felon, abuser (of drugs or women) or someone who is stupid (or even of average intelligence) or unattractive. He's a guy who, years ago, had the equipment and ability to get hard on cue. Which is no small feat. He hurt no one. All he did was earn a living. Look at the man as he is, today. Judge him for who he is, and what he does, now. Not yesterday. All of these are extremely good points, Sinner. But, what in the world would I tell my friends? I guess nothing, huh? What if, as someone mentioned earlier, someone at work or something had seen one of his videos? I can only imagine the reaction! Maybe I am making a bigger deal out of this than I need to... I don't know. More thinking is absolutely in order though. Hey, he said he'd give me a month to think about it. I can't stop laughing at sending the videos to Spock and She's Come Undone!
EC Posted August 20, 2004 Posted August 20, 2004 But, what in the world would I tell my friends? I guess nothing, huh? What if, as someone mentioned earlier, someone at work or something had seen one of his videos? I can only imagine the reaction! You hold your head up high and say "oh yeah..I get that everynight!"
Author shamen Posted August 20, 2004 Author Posted August 20, 2004 Originally posted by EtErNaLlYCoNfUsEd OMG whats the name c'mon spill it spill it.........lol No way! If I can gather up some courage, I'll go see if I can find them, rent them and check 'em out! How DO you find a porno that someone specific has been in? Google it?
havNfun Posted August 20, 2004 Posted August 20, 2004 HEY, send me the videos so I can make informed responses and suggestions here. .... request for said video thanks
She's Come Undone Posted August 20, 2004 Posted August 20, 2004 HELL YEAH, BABY!!!!!! WORK IT, WORK IT!!!
EC Posted August 20, 2004 Posted August 20, 2004 See if we had the name and we all peeked at the video Then we could tell you right away whether to stay with him or not. Its that simple. lol We need a visual here. JK
Author shamen Posted August 20, 2004 Author Posted August 20, 2004 Originally posted by She's Come Undone shamen, I know you have something to tell him as well. Would you be hurt if he judged your past based on that? Would you be hurt if he didn't accept you "issues" and all? It's a tough call, but matches are too infrequent to brush off so quickly. I know you're still weighing it. You're right, I DEFINITELY have things in my own past to tell and I told him the big one last night after he fessed up. I figured, what the hell, I might as well tell him my worst thing if he's told me. He was cool with it, BTW. Yeah, I have been hurt in the past by people judging me on my past, and believe me, it is pretty checkered. He was a pretty good match for me...
Author shamen Posted August 20, 2004 Author Posted August 20, 2004 Originally posted by EtErNaLlYCoNfUsEd You hold your head up high and say "oh yeah..I get that everynight!" You guys are killing me! I have to admit, that might just be the funniest imagined scenario that I've ever had.
She's Come Undone Posted August 20, 2004 Posted August 20, 2004 Girl, as I sit here, I'm still waiting for a response from the guy I was seeing for 7 weeks now. And I know your guy KNOWS some people can accept and some can't, so it won't be a total let down for him. And at least you know how it feels to be on both sides of the coin. I wish my guy would let me know one way or another. I know there are people who won't give a sh*t what my baggage looks like. Not Samsonite, more like Walmart brand!
EC Posted August 20, 2004 Posted August 20, 2004 You have to give him credit though where credit is due. He cmae str8 out and said it. He could've easily not have told you anything and then Imagine your friends faces if they recognize him from a video and you didn't know? What then? I say watch the videos, that way you can see what the damage is , and scope the package, and then make a decision. But honestly I say call him back and go on a second date and pretend he never told you anything. He probably needed the money. lol He sounds like an ok guy.
Author shamen Posted August 20, 2004 Author Posted August 20, 2004 Originally posted by She's Come Undone Girl, as I sit here, I'm still waiting for a response from the guy I was seeing for 7 weeks now. And I know your guy KNOWS some people can accept and some can't, so it won't be a total let down for him. And at least you know how it feels to be on both sides of the coin. I wish my guy would let me know one way or another. I know there are people who won't give a sh*t what my baggage looks like. Not Samsonite, more like Walmart brand! You're so right. He does know that some can accept it and some can't. As I mentioned, he did say that he would've been extremely surprised if I would've been able to make a decision on the spot. I am amazed that he said that he'd give me so long to think about it. I do absolutely know how it feels to be on both sides when it comes to telling someone something really yuck-o about themselves. (I assume that you've read some of my other posts?) God, I'm sorry that your guy has been doing this to you! I hope that you hear from him soon. I'm not going to wait that long to figure it out; he gave me a month. I'll probably need less than that. Here's to having Walmart baggage!
Author shamen Posted August 20, 2004 Author Posted August 20, 2004 Originally posted by EtErNaLlYCoNfUsEd You have to give him credit though where credit is due. He cmae str8 out and said it. He could've easily not have told you anything and then Imagine your friends faces if they recognize him from a video and you didn't know? What then? I say watch the videos, that way you can see what the damage is , and scope the package, and then make a decision. But honestly I say call him back and go on a second date and pretend he never told you anything. He probably needed the money. lol He sounds like an ok guy. You are also totally right; I do give the guy a LOT of credit for having the cajones to come out and just tell me. I wouldn't have told him my big baggage on the first date, if he hadn't inspired me to do so. Maybe I do need to muster up the courage to find the videos! If I do decide to go out with him again, I don't think that I can make the decision today, for example. I am, seriously, probably going to need a couple of weeks to think this through. Now, if I do decide to go out with him again, I don't know that I could pretend he didn't say anything! But, I certainly wouldn't make it the focus of conversation.
Mr Spock Posted August 20, 2004 Posted August 20, 2004 But, what in the world would I tell my friends? I guess nothing, huh? What if, as someone mentioned earlier, someone at work or something had seen one of his videos? I can only imagine the reaction! Sorry, I don't recall seeing to many pornos that focus on faces. So, unless he goes around whipping it out to your friends and family I'm sure your safe on that aspect. Why would you tell your friends his private business anyways? That's the kind of thing he would reveal when he felt comfortable. I know I couldn't point out someone I've seen in porn before, unless it's Peter North or Ron Jeremy-but they're recognizable.
Author shamen Posted August 20, 2004 Author Posted August 20, 2004 Originally posted by Mr Spock Sorry, I don't recall seeing to many pornos that focus on faces. So, unless he goes around whipping it out to your friends and family I'm sure your safe on that aspect. Why would you tell your friends his private business anyways? That's the kind of thing he would reveal when he felt comfortable. I know I couldn't point out someone I've seen in porn before, unless it's Peter North or Ron Jeremy-but they're recognizable. I wouldn't really tell all my friends and family about it! That would be silliness, and just too weird for words. I know, I know, the likelihood of anyone actually being able to recognize this guy are really low. The issue really isn't about my friends and family. It's about whether or not this is something that I could get over... and just accept as part of his past.
tokyo Posted August 20, 2004 Posted August 20, 2004 Boy, you really have to weed out!!! That was hilarious He seems like he knows that a lot of people would feel strange about that and he came clear. I don´t know, maybe he´s worth a second chance? Just because of his honesty?
Mr Spock Posted August 21, 2004 Posted August 21, 2004 If he's hot, and pushing 6 feet tall, and you don't want him, send him my way. I'd like to act out my own little pornography.......it would be fun.
moimeme Posted August 21, 2004 Posted August 21, 2004 When you meet someone who engages you, on all cylinders, don't rule them out because of unorthodox career choices. These folks don't come around that often. Marriage is one long conversation, and if your spouse/lover is a great conversationalist, you are blessed. Much as I hate to admit it, every now and then Statler is right. You hold your head up high and say "oh yeah..I get that everynight!" Excellent! Exactly! I know, the likelihood of anyone actually being able to recognize this guy are really low. Not only that, but should someone recognize him - that means they'd have to admit to watching enough of his films to recognize him And I'm betting people would be much more reluctant to admit that than he was in admitting his past career to you. I think the best point is Statler's though - really great guys aren't all that numerous so if he's got a whole bunch of excellent qualities, why not give him a chance?
sinner Posted August 21, 2004 Posted August 21, 2004 Much as I hate to admit it, every now and then Statler is right. Who's Statler?
Samson Posted August 21, 2004 Posted August 21, 2004 Anyway, sinner and samson, thank you for not dissapointing Shouldn't that be "Statler and Waldorf" ? -Moimeme, AKA, ELMO That makes me Waldorf, the guy on the right in sinner's new avitar.
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