dreamingoftigers Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 I'm very clear. But your OW needed attention for being sexually superior too. PULLEAZE. I'm sure she blew your mind sexually AND THEN you noticed her intelligence, personality, character ( NOT) and integrity. Sorry, SOM, it's the oldest trick in the book. Hmmm,...I wonder how soon she will move on to her next...lover. is it really that easy? a little anal? By that logic my mother-in-law must be really hot stuff. She's the most anal person I have ever met..... 5
Furious Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 By that logic my mother-in-law must be really hot stuff. She's the most anal person I have ever met..... That's so funny...I'm on the floor laughing:D:laugh::D:laugh: 1
Spark1111 Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 I haven't asked that in particular lol, but I did probably say things that would buzz in some of the ears here. It's not competition - at least in my case it wasn't as I knew his W would have done anything else but touch him; the woman was just over and done being physical with him and not just sex. Of course he'll say whatever he has to say in the heat of the moment. Given that an OW is second anyway, the sexual realm is one of the way to claim some priority. exMM offered the info that I was his best sexual partner of all of them, but one never knows when the A fog permeates the p u @ @ y too and it could have been the fog, and not myself in paticular. It doesn't matter anyway at the moment. This discussion brightened my day. and where is he today? raise your standards woman! put your cookie away until a man shows he deserves you and it! I do not say that as a BS, I say that as a woman with many older brothers who lived their masculinity with them as they grew into adulthood. they LOVED easy hot cookie, and ina way,they cared for the woman who provided it.....but they KILLED themselves to get the woman too good for them. She too had hot sex with them, but they had to provide,protect, profess and protect before she doled it out. Be THAT woman! 2
Steen719 Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 By that logic my mother-in-law must be really hot stuff. She's the most anal person I have ever met..... Oh dear God.....thank you!:lmao::lmao::lmao: 1
veryhappy Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 (edited) and where is he today? raise your standards woman! put your cookie away until a man shows he deserves you and it! I do not say that as a BS, I say that as a woman with many older brothers who lived their masculinity with them as they grew into adulthood. they LOVED easy hot cookie, and ina way,they cared for the woman who provided it.....but they KILLED themselves to get the woman too good for them. She too had hot sex with them, but they had to provide,protect, profess and protect before she doled it out. Be THAT woman! My cookie is securely wrapped in one of those wrappers that take an hour and the entire tool box to unwrap. MM staying with the wives has nothing to do with how freely the cookie crumbled in the A. Look at shame - he's not tormented by how to seduce his wife and get in her cookie jar. He still wants the OW. Doesn't mean anything to her, as it doesn't to me if exMM's wet dreams are about me. I don't do drama and don't like games. If the guy has his issues and he needs his masochist dynamic, I don't provide that. I'm not into painful mental games. That's what he has with his W. He runs endlessly to get some rare pat on the back. Not my style. To each its own. Edited January 12, 2013 by cutedragon
veryhappy Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 I'd also like to provide a wise piece of advice for women who are asked about anal sex and have no interest. Offer to stuck something thick up theirs first to see how dedicated they are to the cause. ExMM cringed. Well, if it doesn't excite you I don't see why it should get me all wet. 5
dreamingoftigers Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 That's so funny...I'm on the floor laughing:D:laugh::D:laugh: It is funny from a distance....
Spark1111 Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 I'd also like to provide a wise piece of advice for women who are asked about anal sex and have no interest. Offer to stuck something thick up theirs first to see how dedicated they are to the cause. ExMM cringed. Well, if it doesn't excite you I don't see why it should get me all wet. on this we agree! look at all the men who fantasize about two women. okay, fine, but then ask when is it my turn to have you and another man....watch the panic cross their faces. 3
Spark1111 Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 My cookie is securely wrapped in one of those wrappers that take an hour and the entire tool box to unwrap. MM staying with the wives has nothing to do with how freely the cookie crumbled in the A. Look at shame - he's not tormented by how to seduce his wife and get in her cookie jar. He still wants the OW. Doesn't mean anything to her, as it doesn't to me if exMM's wet dreams are about me. I don't do drama and don't like games. If the guy has his issues and he needs his masochist dynamic, I don't provide that. I'm not into painful mental games. That's what he has with his W. He runs endlessly to get some rare pat on the back. Not my style. To each its own. then be grateful you didn't wind up with him....and please aspire to be more than the source of a man's wet dream. Aspire to be a part of all his dreams.
BrokenPrincess Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 Slight t/j speaking if all this wetness & affair sex...until my A, I had no idea that men still had wet dreams past puberty! I don't know if its good, bad, or neither that my H has never had one, but when my xMM first confessed he'd woken up in his hotel bed rated NC-17 after a night of steamy video calling, I thought he was joking. Men still get wet dream in their late 40s?!!? Or is that just a part of A excitement?
Decorative Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 Slight t/j speaking if all this wetness & affair sex...until my A, I had no idea that men still had wet dreams past puberty! I don't know if its good, bad, or neither that my H has never had one, but when my xMM first confessed he'd woken up in his hotel bed rated NC-17 after a night of steamy video calling, I thought he was joking. Men still get wet dream in their late 40s?!!? Or is that just a part of A excitement? No. It can happen throughout a male's lifetime. Some men have it more frequently, and it's not related to the amount of sex they have. Or being in an affair. #toomuchinformation
BrokenPrincess Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 Wet dreams is TMI in an affair sex thread but someone posting that their OW wanted confirmation that her pu$$y is better than BW or discussion on requesting anal sex is not? 1
Decorative Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 (edited) Wet dreams is TMI in an affair sex thread but someone posting that their OW wanted confirmation that her pu$$y is better than BW or discussion on requesting anal sex is not? The pound sign was me being funny. About me. Not you. LOL You know, like a twitter tag? LOL I have no comment on the other stuff. That's why I stuck to making a joke about what I did. Edited January 12, 2013 by Decorative 3
neveragain34 Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 Sigh. All of this sex talk is making me miss sex with my exMM. He's a jerk, but the sex was absolutely amazing. Best sex ever; I could really let go around him. I wonder what it is about an A that makes you lose all inhibitions. I'd never go back, but I guess it's normal to miss it. I've had sex once since him and it was mediocre. I hope all post-affair sex isn't like this!
Author shame_on_me Posted January 12, 2013 Author Posted January 12, 2013 I'm very clear. But your OW needed attention for being sexually superior too. PULLEAZE. I'm sure she blew your mind sexually AND THEN you noticed her intelligence, personality, character ( NOT) and integrity. Sorry, SOM, it's the oldest trick in the book. Hmmm,...I wonder how soon she will move on to her next...lover. is it really that easy? a little anal? Hi Spark I knew exow for years prior to our affair, i didnt know her personally but we had many chats and i was always fascinated by her mind she would come out with the most bizzare things sometimes but none the less fascinating. She's very care-free into all the spiritual stuff, has a degree in genetics and also has a small holding in her yard for injured animals, everyone in the town takes injured wild animals to her she will either care for them herself or pass them onto the rspca - and she is also a professional female boxer, i dont think she does much of the boxing since the birth of her child a few years ago but she does train in the gym 3/4 times a week. Taking all this into account and the wild sex she gave me ?? How could i not fall in love with her, but she probably knew that to, shes not stupid. But in the end it ultimately did not change my mind about leaving my family
egalew Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 Truthfully, is this not the answer you want to hear probably, I believe in sexual chemistry. Just like you have emotional / intellectual compatibility with someone, you can have sexual chemistry. And if it's not there it's a hard thing to force. That doesn't mean you don't love the person. 1
sweet_pea Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 No. It can happen throughout a male's lifetime. Some men have it more frequently, and it's not related to the amount of sex they have. Or being in an affair. #toomuchinformation T/J, Decorative, you crack me up with those #hashtags! And I'm out! 1
RickFox Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 on this we agree! look at all the men who fantasize about two women. okay, fine, but then ask when is it my turn to have you and another man....watch the panic cross their faces. Shoot! Got a hard enough time trying to please one woman, why in the H E double hockey sticks would I try two at the same damn time. Thinking about that makes me want a nap! 2
dreamingoftigers Posted January 13, 2013 Posted January 13, 2013 Shoot! Got a hard enough time trying to please one woman, why in the H E double hockey sticks would I try two at the same damn time. Thinking about that makes me want a nap! My husband says he never wants a threesome because he doesn't need two women to "disappoint." One is more than enough. For those of you that may not see it, it's his idea of a joke. He doesn't disappoint me and I don't store his balls under the kitchen sink to be taken out only on special occasions. 3
cocorico Posted January 13, 2013 Posted January 13, 2013 I haven't seen the word "love" mentioned ONCE from SOM with respect to his ex-ow. It seems all he keeps talking about is what a great LAY she was and how happy You can't have looked too closely then. His previous threads were full of that, and this from his first post in this thread: And no I will not get back into an affair with exow (have not spoken with her since that fateful evening i slept in the garage) I still think i love her Elsewhere in this thread he stated that he has focused on the sex on this thread rather than the emotional connection, because when he spoke previously about the emotional connection etc he was dog piled. 3
Author shame_on_me Posted January 13, 2013 Author Posted January 13, 2013 You can't have looked too closely then. His previous threads were full of that, and this from his first post in this thread: Elsewhere in this thread he stated that he has focused on the sex on this thread rather than the emotional connection, because when he spoke previously about the emotional connection etc he was dog piled. Coco - thanks for this I didnt want to continuously repeat that i love my exow, i do love her maybe i always will love her, i may regret not leaving my wife for her but at the moment i cant be sure of that. All i know is i have never felt so much pain in my life i dont know where my head is it half the time. But i am taking advice from these forums and i have to let this "fog" clear before i can make any judgements or decisions. But i do know i love my wife and my family and i still balk at the thought of ever leaving them. Confused to say the least.
whichwayisup Posted January 14, 2013 Posted January 14, 2013 Hmm, call that therapist/counselor tomorrow... She/he will be able to help you with all this so you can cope better with the thoughts that are on going and won't stop. Remember though, you love your MW IN an affair setting. Of course nothing else matters except you and her. There are no outside forces, tests of what you both would or wouldn't put up with, no test of the glue that held the A together. No kids, no in laws, no fighting, no stress, no house, no bills, no illness, bad moods, etc..etc.. Just happy times spent together based on emotions and affair setting love. Sure you may truly feel in love, ON an emotional and physical level but that isn't enough to make you leave and end your marriage. If she left her husband, divorced him, would you up and divorce your wife to be with her? 1
Spark1111 Posted January 14, 2013 Posted January 14, 2013 Coco - thanks for this I didnt want to continuously repeat that i love my exow, i do love her maybe i always will love her, i may regret not leaving my wife for her but at the moment i cant be sure of that. All i know is i have never felt so much pain in my life i dont know where my head is it half the time. But i am taking advice from these forums and i have to let this "fog" clear before i can make any judgements or decisions. But i do know i love my wife and my family and i still balk at the thought of ever leaving them. Confused to say the least. So, I will ask for the second time....how much time did you invest weekly to thinking of, texting, calling, emailing your OW? planning the next meet up? Where you meet up, what you would have fun doing to your OW? What is the answer, SOM? And then, I want you to tell me how much time you invested in you wife? I gained the cell phone records and bank statements. I do, sort of, know the answer. We were forced to examine it in MC. It helped him immensely. SOM! What is your answer? OW vrs. Wife? Time invested? 1
Author shame_on_me Posted January 14, 2013 Author Posted January 14, 2013 So, I will ask for the second time....how much time did you invest weekly to thinking of, texting, calling, emailing your OW? planning the next meet up? Where you meet up, what you would have fun doing to your OW? What is the answer, SOM? And then, I want you to tell me how much time you invested in you wife? I gained the cell phone records and bank statements. I do, sort of, know the answer. We were forced to examine it in MC. It helped him immensely. SOM! What is your answer? OW vrs. Wife? Time invested? At the beginning we text sporadically maybe 1 or 2 texts a day and maybe seen each other once a week for a chat. I was still very reluctant at this point and the guilt was overwhelming, i spend more time with my wife the first couple of months of my affair. As time went by the texts were constant between us (30-50) texts per day and sometimes i would see her 3/4 times a week we were in constant contact and knew each others movements.
Author shame_on_me Posted January 14, 2013 Author Posted January 14, 2013 OP, maybe I'm naive, but I don't really see how your ex other woman treated you in a way that was really all that loving... she knew, from the start, that you loved your wife and felt conflicted..she knew that having an affair would be hurtful to you...yet she went ahead anyway... ( this isn't to blame her for your choices or anything, but rather I;m asking you to examine her actions) from what you say, she has a bad marriage and may not see cheating on her husband as a problem if she no longer loves him, but , from what you say, she knew how you felt about your wife...yet she chose to engage in behavior that would hurt a woman who had done nothing to her, that she didn't even know, but she knew you still loved and wanted to remain married to... ( again, this is not blaming her for your actions, but asking you to really examine hers...what do they tell you? none of us know her, but you do, and if you take off your "affair goggles" for a few minutes, what do you see?) Frozen: I like you, you always make me think "outside the box" and this has me thinking. I asked her numberous times what she see's in me, im nothing special not even that good looking, why did she invest so much time in me ? I know she loved/loves me but surely she cant see herself and child living with a 49 year old man ? She did tell me she liked me for years beforehand and always fantasied about having an affair with me, i dont know what this says. But i was the one who initiated that first kiss and i was the one who suggested the hotel the first time. Although i did try to end things in the beginning a few times i am, ultimately the one who went back to her.
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