M30USA Posted January 9, 2013 Posted January 9, 2013 My ex in laws were Hispanic. I am Caucasian. I was overwhelmed by their smothering approach to life. Every part of my married life, it seemed, was their business. On the flip side, they viewed me as "reserved and guarded"--that's the worst criticism her dad could throw at me in divorce court. I guess, to their culture, I would be considered those things. But you know what? They acted like their culture was the gold standard and better than mine. No it's not.
carhill Posted January 9, 2013 Posted January 9, 2013 Inter-cultural marriages are a blending of cultures. If the individuals feel and assert that their culture is 'better', that is the feeling and assertion of those individuals and not a reflection upon their culture. Cultures are made up of individuals and rarely are static over time. Due to my geographic location, I have decades of experience with Hispanic culture, specifically that from Mexico, in all aspects of living. Overall, my takeaway is positive. Sure, there have been individuals whom may not be shining examples of either decent human beings nor representative of that overall experience, but such does not taint my overall impression. Take a look at all the Hispanic people you know personally and professionally for examples in your own life. Would you say the behavior of FIL in court represents what you feel from them?
Mme. Chaucer Posted January 9, 2013 Posted January 9, 2013 I think it's healthy to vent and to go through all the pain of divorce and its fallout - but, sincerely, don't you think it's close to time for you to stop trying to assign blame? Your marriage failed and from the sound of it, it was a wreck. You have young kids to co-parent. Wouldn't the best thing to concentrate upon at this time to be how you and your ex wife can succeed in doing that?
Author M30USA Posted January 9, 2013 Author Posted January 9, 2013 I think it's healthy to vent and to go through all the pain of divorce and its fallout - but, sincerely, don't you think it's close to time for you to stop trying to assign blame? Your marriage failed and from the sound of it, it was a wreck. You have young kids to co-parent. Wouldn't the best thing to concentrate upon at this time to be how you and your ex wife can succeed in doing that? She does not coparent! She does not know how! That's my point! Her entire life she has always had her way--and her parents have encouraged it! You can say I need to "move on" but there is no moving on with a woman like that once you have kids with her. She WILL win. I will lose. And now that she's won primary custody, it will stay this way forever.
TaraMaiden Posted January 9, 2013 Posted January 9, 2013 Have you given up on this thread, then? Why?
Author M30USA Posted January 9, 2013 Author Posted January 9, 2013 I liked your last post in that thread.
TaraMaiden Posted January 9, 2013 Posted January 9, 2013 Oh... Ok. If ever you'd like to vent in PM's, feel free. I'm a punchy bitch, but I mean well.
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