How much should I tell my boyfriend

[runner21]

Okay, so two issues:

1) my boyfriend and I started out as informal and "open." We got together right after I had been hooking up with his friend for a couple of weeks. I really liked his friend, but he broke it off. So, when my boyfriend and I got together, I still had feelings for his friend. I even broke it off with my boyfriend after a couple of weeks. I gave him a different reason, but really I didn't want to ruin the possibility of getting with his friend in the future. Then my boyfriend and I ended up getting back together, and then he broke up with me a week later. Then we tried to be just friends for a while but we ended up getting back together, and now we've been officially dating for a month or so. Now, I feel badly because I had at least some feelings for his friend after my boyfriend and I officially got together. We would still hang out sometimes as friends, but he would sometimes flirt with me and I with him. I feel so badly because my boyfriend thinks I only liked him the whole time. should I tell him so that he can decide if I'm worth it? I've never cheated on anyone and never will, but it felt like emotional cheating at times. The thing is, I don't want to lose him now. Our relationship has really grown, and I have definitely fallen for him. Still, he thinks I'm perfect, and I know I'm not.

2) 3 of my guy friends were making fun of one of my other friends for not being circumcised. They were making fun of him behind his back. I said "guys, it's not a big deal to be uncircumcised. It doesn't look weird." And while I believe this, I was kind of doing this in a jesting manner and intentionally turning the conversation towards the fact that I had seen an uncircumcised penis (my boyfriends). For some reason I wanted them to know, and I don't know why I would do this. I'm obviously not bothered at all by the fact that my boyfriend is uncircumcised. But he is a very private person, and I know he would be horrified if he knew I had told. I guess I didn't actually tell, but my friends guessed that it was my boyfriend I was talking about (and I knew they would). Then I tried to deny it, but I don't know if this was because I felt badly or I didn't want to look trashy. the worst part is, these guys are on the same sports team as my boyfriend, and I just feel so badly that I did this. I've clearly had some bad lapses in judgment. What should I do? Should I tell him? I feel like I don't deserve to be with him. It makes me feel sick. And he's the first person I've fallen for, but I feel like i've ruined it

[Leegh]

Don't worry so much, you're fine. People cannot help how they feel. Sometimes even married people get emotional crushes on other people. In addition, if you feel like you may be saying things you'll later regret, wait a day or two and think about if you really want to say it. Most of the time the feeling of saying it will have passed.