mo110 Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 I met my best friend in during my Junior year in college, from the moment I layed eyes on her I felt an instant connection that was out of this world. I have a hard time trusting people but this girl made me open myself up quicker than I could have ever imagined. We were inseparable throughout our relationship by hanging out constantly and talking on the phone everyday and night. We went through some tough times in our personal lives and were there for each other when things got very bad. It felt like we were the same people going through the same stuff just in separate bodies. We were so comfortable with each other that it was amazing. Whenever we were in front of each other we both felt complete and needed nothing else to be happy. 2 years into the relationship we felt as if we had just met and the spark continued to stay. We had some occasional fights as a couple which is completely normal but we both knew that our love for one another was so strong that we could forgive easily. We were of the same religion but different beliefs within the religion which made it difficult for her to tell her parents about me as she came from a strict religious family. Wanting me to "convert" to her side of the religion put me in a tough place because I wasn't comfortable with it and it would disappoint my family. Trying to come to some solution to satisfy both of us was almost impossible. It came to a point where we were still seeing each daily and put those issues behind us. I thought in some magical way if we were meant to be together that things will work out for us. Towards the end of our 3rd year in the relationship her parents wanted to introduce her to someone that they thought was suitable in their eyes for marriage. Given our obstacles my ex decided to listen to her parents and just go with their wishes because she felt stuck and wanted to break our cycle that was going nowhere. I havent spoken to her since the day she told me about this other guy her parents want her to get to know. I figured it wasnt meant to be for both of us but now I miss her like crazy and reflect back if I was just being very stubborn. In the moment these religious issues we had seemed impossible to get through and consumed our energy like crazy. None of us wanted to disobey our families but now im thinking that I should have just given in because I find it hard to live without her. She was my best friend and my everything, it was been almost 3 months since we have talked on the phone or had any contact and just last week we were forced to see each other in a social setting due to having mutual friends. I was trying to be very friendly and normal with her but I felt that she was trying to stay disconnected in her responses and interaction with me. I guess this was her way of coping with our interaction? Any advice would help greatly!
LostOne1 Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 I met my best friend in during my Junior year in college, from the moment I layed eyes on her I felt an instant connection that was out of this world. I have a hard time trusting people but this girl made me open myself up quicker than I could have ever imagined. We were inseparable throughout our relationship by hanging out constantly and talking on the phone everyday and night. We went through some tough times in our personal lives and were there for each other when things got very bad. It felt like we were the same people going through the same stuff just in separate bodies. We were so comfortable with each other that it was amazing. Whenever we were in front of each other we both felt complete and needed nothing else to be happy. 2 years into the relationship we felt as if we had just met and the spark continued to stay. We had some occasional fights as a couple which is completely normal but we both knew that our love for one another was so strong that we could forgive easily. We were of the same religion but different beliefs within the religion which made it difficult for her to tell her parents about me as she came from a strict religious family. Wanting me to "convert" to her side of the religion put me in a tough place because I wasn't comfortable with it and it would disappoint my family. Trying to come to some solution to satisfy both of us was almost impossible. It came to a point where we were still seeing each daily and put those issues behind us. I thought in some magical way if we were meant to be together that things will work out for us. Towards the end of our 3rd year in the relationship her parents wanted to introduce her to someone that they thought was suitable in their eyes for marriage. Given our obstacles my ex decided to listen to her parents and just go with their wishes because she felt stuck and wanted to break our cycle that was going nowhere. I havent spoken to her since the day she told me about this other guy her parents want her to get to know. I figured it wasnt meant to be for both of us but now I miss her like crazy and reflect back if I was just being very stubborn. In the moment these religious issues we had seemed impossible to get through and consumed our energy like crazy. None of us wanted to disobey our families but now im thinking that I should have just given in because I find it hard to live without her. She was my best friend and my everything, it was been almost 3 months since we have talked on the phone or had any contact and just last week we were forced to see each other in a social setting due to having mutual friends. I was trying to be very friendly and normal with her but I felt that she was trying to stay disconnected in her responses and interaction with me. I guess this was her way of coping with our interaction? Any advice would help greatly! I know how you feel about going NC and then seeing each other. I just ran into my ex today actually. I've been NC for about 2-3 months now and BU for about 6. Although me and my ex didn't talk we did give out some eye contact. It's tough man.. I know it must be killing you inside and I was there once man. In fact it doesn't hurt as much now, but before it just killed me that my ex's way to cope was to not talk. And when we did talk it was always mixed up with feelings for me one day and absolutely nothing for me the next. It drove me crazy and made it so hard till I went NC. I don't know about advice, but if she was pushing back when you were tyring to be normal and nice. Then I'd not say much or do much else. It's her way of saying she's uncomfortable and if she wanted to be with you again.. I think she would've made it clear. My guess is she is slowly trying to accept that this is how things are and she is trying to accept it. I mean it can't be easy for you or anyone else either to sit there and be with the one you loved or still love and know your not together and have to act all nice and friendly still.
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