allenpo123 Posted January 7, 2013 Posted January 7, 2013 My ex contacted me again, this time he said he missed me and he asked me to take my profile pic down because I looked good and it reminds me of the good time we had together. I felt touched and happy that he's been going through the same thing as me. I missed him so much but we had to remain 'cold' contact, so I thought he was already over me... I was sad then. But now I know he still has feelings for me, I feel so much more powerful now and I feel like I'm able to move on. Knowing that "he still wants me" makes me more confident and makes me want him less (compared to before when he didn't contact me) I know I'm being selfish, but it's a huge confidence boost knowing that he still wants me. I'm not keeping him on a string or leading him on, but it sure feels good making him "suffer" I hope this feeling lasts 3
Leegh Posted January 7, 2013 Posted January 7, 2013 Yes, I agree, it is a huge confident boost when we hear from someone that we thought was out of the picture. Sometimes good things do happen.
tinkerbash Posted January 7, 2013 Posted January 7, 2013 uuuuuh im so envious! im actually going through hell just now! hearing what happened to you gives me hope although my now ex is very stubborn so im not too sure... good for you you can now have the upper hand!!! i now have hope mine will do the same
Author allenpo123 Posted January 8, 2013 Author Posted January 8, 2013 uuuuuh im so envious! im actually going through hell just now! hearing what happened to you gives me hope although my now ex is very stubborn so im not too sure... good for you you can now have the upper hand!!! i now have hope mine will do the same ..... that upper-hand feeling is fading... I started to feel bad about him missing me because I didn't take down my "awesome" profile pic. I didn't want him to suffer, I want him to be happy. If I moved on, I want him to be the same...........SO.... I took down my profile pic and sent a playful text saying I changed my profile pic, hope that's ok for you And he didn't respond!!! Man... so I'm waiting for him to text back now......... I hate myself...... I'm not sure if he'll text me back this time. I think he also knew that saying he missed me and all was bad for him, and it would be best if we kept NC for another while. I feel fine without him, but I don't like the fact that he didn't return my message... I wish I didn't send him that text. If your ex comes back and tells you he misses you, promise me you won't do anything stupid like what I just did
Samilia Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 ..... that upper-hand feeling is fading... I started to feel bad about him missing me because I didn't take down my "awesome" profile pic. I didn't want him to suffer, I want him to be happy. If I moved on, I want him to be the same...........SO.... I took down my profile pic and sent a playful text saying I changed my profile pic, hope that's ok for you And he didn't respond!!! Man... so I'm waiting for him to text back now......... I hate myself...... I'm not sure if he'll text me back this time. I think he also knew that saying he missed me and all was bad for him, and it would be best if we kept NC for another while. I feel fine without him, but I don't like the fact that he didn't return my message... I wish I didn't send him that text. If your ex comes back and tells you he misses you, promise me you won't do anything stupid like what I just did I would put a new picture from you taken recently, after the break up, where you look even better. And if he contacted me again, if he asked again to take the picture down, I'd reply he could have the real thing, or not bother at all. 2
itsmyfault Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 ahhhh... Something I have found out from this place and my own experience, Is that people love to play mind games. Something people forget though, It's just as easy to get burnt by your own game. For the future i'm going to go No Contact and stay it. If I was the Dumpee and I got a "i miss you" text. I'd probably simply reply "prove it" You will soon find out if they actually mean it or not. 1
fixing Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 ..... that upper-hand feeling is fading... I started to feel bad about him missing me because I didn't take down my "awesome" profile pic. I didn't want him to suffer, I want him to be happy. If I moved on, I want him to be the same...........SO.... I took down my profile pic and sent a playful text saying I changed my profile pic, hope that's ok for you And he didn't respond!!! Man... so I'm waiting for him to text back now......... I hate myself...... I'm not sure if he'll text me back this time. I think he also knew that saying he missed me and all was bad for him, and it would be best if we kept NC for another while. I feel fine without him, but I don't like the fact that he didn't return my message... I wish I didn't send him that text. If your ex comes back and tells you he misses you, promise me you won't do anything stupid like what I just did Relax, and dont beat yourself up. It just shows what a wonderful person you are that you changed your picture because you didnt want to make him feel bad! But yeah, like someone else said, replace it with an even sexier picture IMO. And you know, by now, dont even bother replying to him again.
cavalier99 Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 Feeling good about a text that says they miss you is a setback. You are better off thinking they don't care about you at all. Any kind words make it more difficult to become indifferent and move on. Responding will make it even worse. Remember the goal is to become indifferent and NOT think of them or care what they think of us at all. F*ck those nice texts..they totally suck and are evil. 1
rys Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 sent a playful text saying I changed my profile pic, hope that's ok for you And he didn't respond!!! Man... so I'm waiting for him to text back now......... I hate myself...... Nooooo!!!! whyyyyyy??? Hahaha don't worry, you're not alone. Why do we fall for their traps? 1
na49 Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 Feeling good about a text that says they miss you is a setback. You are better off thinking they don't care about you at all. Any kind words make it more difficult to become indifferent and move on. Responding will make it even worse. Remember the goal is to become indifferent and NOT think of them or care what they think of us at all. F*ck those nice texts..they totally suck and are evil. Agreed 110% Let me be seen as proof that hearing your ex misses you does NOTHING in helping you to move on. Think about it. When someone says they "miss you" what do they mean really? It means about as much as when someone says "sorry" for bumping into you. Are they really up all day and night, putting their life on hold because we aren't a part of their life anymore? Or do they just miss that we were there for them. They realize that. and they'd like for us to be there for them now even though they want nothing to do with us. So they really don't "miss us" like we think. It gives us false hope that they want to reconcile with us. They don't. They were either bored, or drunk and need someone to talk to. It's better to hear nothing. Just assume they are a cold evil person, this way you hate them and don't want them anymore 1
cavalier99 Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 Ive decided if i get any more communication from my ex id like it to say Cav, I barely think of you at all anymore. But when i do I'm just relieved your gone, I've decided I'm really happy now and am super glad i broke up with you and my life is soooo much better in every way with my new boyfriend. Just wanted to say Hi. Hope you are well too! G This is waaaay better than the nice texts!
na49 Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 Ive decided if i get any more communication from my ex id like it to say Cav, I barely think of you at all anymore. But when i do I'm just relieved your gone, I've decided I'm really happy now and am super glad i broke up with you and my life is soooo much better in every way with my new boyfriend. Just wanted to say Hi. Hope you are well too! G This is waaaay better than the nice texts! Not sure I'd like to hear THAT from my ex. I'd rather hear nothing. 1
cavalier99 Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 . Not sure I'd like to hear THAT from my ex. I'd rather hear nothing. Weeeell me neither..but it sure would make it difficult after reading that to hold onto false hope.
youngnlove89 Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 (edited) My ex contacted me again, this time he said he missed me and he asked me to take my profile pic down because I looked good and it reminds me of the good time we had together. I felt touched and happy that he's been going through the same thing as me. I missed him so much but we had to remain 'cold' contact, so I thought he was already over me... I was sad then. But now I know he still has feelings for me, I feel so much more powerful now and I feel like I'm able to move on. Knowing that "he still wants me" makes me more confident and makes me want him less (compared to before when he didn't contact me) I know I'm being selfish, but it's a huge confidence boost knowing that he still wants me. I'm not keeping him on a string or leading him on, but it sure feels good making him "suffer" I hope this feeling lasts Unfortunately, this feeling WON'T last. I've been here. It gives you this huge ego boost that lasts for a couple days. Then your brain starts to think A LOT. "Mabye this could work" "He realized what he lost" "We can be happy now!" And then you contact him. And maybe you get back together. It lasts awhile, or maybe it doesn't long enough. And then it happens again. You break up and you are back to square one wondering why you were the idiot that took them back thinking things would change. Let me repeat: Things never change. Ex's don't just suddenly change. What he is feeling now is loneliness. You were familiar. Men who miss their ex's randomely have found out that it isn't so easy to replace that comfort with another woman. It's easy being with you because he knew you. Now, he has to go out and learn to know someone else. It's exhausting and it takes time to get to know someone. He misses that he can just cuddle with you and know not to touch the remote or you will yell at him for changing the channel of Sex and The City re-runs!! Don't get me wrong, you are deeply missable. But you broke up for a reason and you have to remind yourself of that EVERYDAY. Please do not reply to him. Edited January 8, 2013 by youngnlove89 1
flitzanu Posted January 8, 2013 Posted January 8, 2013 ..... that upper-hand feeling is fading... I started to feel bad about him missing me because I didn't take down my "awesome" profile pic. I didn't want him to suffer, I want him to be happy. If I moved on, I want him to be the same...........SO.... I took down my profile pic and sent a playful text saying I changed my profile pic, hope that's ok for you And he didn't respond!!! Man... so I'm waiting for him to text back now......... I hate myself...... I'm not sure if he'll text me back this time. I think he also knew that saying he missed me and all was bad for him, and it would be best if we kept NC for another while. I feel fine without him, but I don't like the fact that he didn't return my message... I wish I didn't send him that text. If your ex comes back and tells you he misses you, promise me you won't do anything stupid like what I just did now you're just playing games. if he has a problem with your picture you should block him. why are you communicating anyway?
Author allenpo123 Posted January 10, 2013 Author Posted January 10, 2013 Feeling good about a text that says they miss you is a setback. You are better off thinking they don't care about you at all. Any kind words make it more difficult to become indifferent and move on. Responding will make it even worse. Remember the goal is to become indifferent and NOT think of them or care what they think of us at all. F*ck those nice texts..they totally suck and are evil. But we actually broke up on good terms. I wish him well and he wishes me the same. He has a very nice personality but it just wasn't right for us. I can't hate him..
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