Stay friends for now or move on?

[Blue22]

About 6 months ago I met up with a girl that I'd classify as a friend of a friend. She had been dating a guy I know for 4 years. He moved out of state a year ago. When we met out we were both a bit over served but got to talking and really seemed to connect, I'd gone through a divorce in the last year and she implied that the 4 year, now long distance relationship wasn't working and was all but over, just not official. We ended up kissing all night at her place, but then she called the next day and was freaking out and upset with herself as she still cares for the out of state guy and felt guilty.

 

We didn't talk much for a couple weeks but I started texting her and we started communicating much more. We would meet up and just talk all night effortlessly. Her main issue with her boyfriend is he doesn't talk much, he doesn't seem to like sex, says she's a bad kisser, she can walk around naked and he'll watch a ball game, pretty much either gay, no sex drive or I guess he's not that physically attracted to her. For several months we would meet out, hold each other all night, never had sex, but got very close.

 

Then over the holidays he has been back a few times and now she says we can only be friends and she's not ready to let him go, says she want to figure out if he's the one and she can live with his lack of sexuality, she says she's very sexual, or if that's not going to work for her. He also never wants kids and thinks marriage is a useless paper.

 

I do really care for this girl, I also get the fact she needs to figure out the long distance thing before we could ever have a fulfilling relationship. I just can't figure out what she is holding onto outside of the comfort of someone you dated for a long time. It would seem our relationship tells me she isn't and won't be content long-term with the guy. Should I move on or accept just friends with hopes of something more? I told her I respect where she is at, and that I wouldn't be contacting her going forward, but my door was always open if she needed anything or if things changed. It's been 4 days of no contact and it sucks, talked/texted her just about everyday for 6 months.

[unluckyinlove4]

About 6 months ago I met up with a girl that I'd classify as a friend of a friend. She had been dating a guy I know for 4 years. He moved out of state a year ago. When we met out we were both a bit over served but got to talking and really seemed to connect, I'd gone through a divorce in the last year and she implied that the 4 year, now long distance relationship wasn't working and was all but over, just not official. We ended up kissing all night at her place, but then she called the next day and was freaking out and upset with herself as she still cares for the out of state guy and felt guilty.

 

We didn't talk much for a couple weeks but I started texting her and we started communicating much more. We would meet up and just talk all night effortlessly. Her main issue with her boyfriend is he doesn't talk much, he doesn't seem to like sex, says she's a bad kisser, she can walk around naked and he'll watch a ball game, pretty much either gay, no sex drive or I guess he's not that physically attracted to her. For several months we would meet out, hold each other all night, never had sex, but got very close.

 

Then over the holidays he has been back a few times and now she says we can only be friends and she's not ready to let him go, says she want to figure out if he's the one and she can live with his lack of sexuality, she says she's very sexual, or if that's not going to work for her. He also never wants kids and thinks marriage is a useless paper.

 

I do really care for this girl, I also get the fact she needs to figure out the long distance thing before we could ever have a fulfilling relationship. I just can't figure out what she is holding onto outside of the comfort of someone you dated for a long time. It would seem our relationship tells me she isn't and won't be content long-term with the guy. Should I move on or accept just friends with hopes of something more? I told her I respect where she is at, and that I wouldn't be contacting her going forward, but my door was always open if she needed anything or if things changed. It's been 4 days of no contact and it sucks, talked/texted her just about everyday for 6 months.

 

Move on. She'll either break up with him and seek you out or she will stay with him and you won't have lost anything. Either way, it's a win-win for you.