LonelyHero Posted January 6, 2013 Posted January 6, 2013 (edited) Hello all, i m interested in a girl . We are in the same university and we are toghether in some subjects. i met her like 3 months ago and i was interested from the first time. i m gonna tell what happened goods and bads. facts: 1)when i first met her she told me that she likes my hair, said i have a well built body, liked my surname(LOL) and one t-shirt i was wearing (not everything in the same day) 2)i was at a club with friends and she came like 30 minutes later. she didn't see me cuz it was full of ppl. i went to say hi , to ask her what's going on and stuff and i returned to my friends waiting for her to come, but she didn't. my friends got bored, i told them wait to say goodbye and i come. i went to her ... she was speaking with one of her friends. when she saw me she pushed me on a wall and stuck her body on my, touched my chest and scratched me with her nails at my back, and her face was dangerously close to mine. i didn't kiss her cuz she was obviously drunk and i m not this kind of guys. i took her home with one of her friends took care of her and then i left when i was sure she was ok. 3) next day she texted me , oh i m sorry i m such a tragic person. i respond i m going to sleep for 3 hours , we talk later(my friends told me this was so cold).in the same day we met at university and she told me , oh i am sorry nothing would happen if i wasn't drunk. i told her : okay that's not the best thing they have told me , but whatever. (i was ready to talk to her that day but i didn't cuz she was told me these things. 4) i do not believe in friendship between boy/girl and i have told her almost from the start 5) i started ignoring her for some days , maybe a week. i deleted my facebook account, too. Then, we had some obligatory lab subject toghether.. i was at the cafeteria, she was there already and passed me by without saying a word, my friend told me she saw me. then she went and stand by the window where i was looking, so i saw her and greeted her. she came in and said , will you come , won't you? i said no. -why? -i m bored. -okay see you. 6) after this subject we had another one toghether, so i went there alone and after a while she came and sat beside me. i ignored her there , too ... then she told me , you don't believe in friendship between f/m , i said yes. (even though i don't believe i have some girls in my clique and we just go out toghether,drink ,post photos on facebook) -would you like me to be in your clique?? i didn't know what to tell... i thought for a minute and i said okay we can arrange something... but we didn't. (by the way she had told me that she is seeing another guy but she is not sure if she wants to continue or not and that's why i didn't talk to her all this time) 7) last day before christmas vacation i was in a good mood and so was she. i met her at university and she told me that she likes me(just this not the love like)... now i won't see you for 2 weeks... i said yes but we can talk on facebook. and she said yes and i will call you at christmas and new years eve. in the end i told her , should we say goodbye now or i ll see you tomorrow? -let's say now -ok, goodbuy -she made a movement with the hand to her face meaning kiss me. and i kissed her at cheeks. 8) now in vacations i chatted with her almost everyday. i sent her a message first, and we chatted a lot. i told her that i like talking to her face to face instead of facebook and this is not happening with many ppl. 9) at christmas day she sent me first and we chatted for a while and i told her wishes and she said: all your dreams to come true and to be with the girl you like, if you like someone ( i think this is too specific for a christmas wish) talk.talk.talk bla bla bla, then she posts a cover on facebook saying the hardest things to say are worth saying. ( i dk if she did this for me to see it or it s irrelevant.) then the guy she had told me they were ALMOST toghether liked her cover and she told me that they are not toghether. after a while , she asked me if i chat with other chicks at facebook, i told her yes cause i was really chatting, and she told me oh this sucks close all the others or choose one. who you choose and i told i choose her (like a pokemon lol) and she told me ... okay you passed. and i don't know if this was serious or just a joke... Because i don't believe in friendship f/m , she asked me why i talk to her and i said we are going to talk when we meet. 10)then she was weird for 2 days and we didn't chatted much. the only thing i send her a song on youtube saying friends and foes and i asked her, friends or foes? she told me friends and foes. 11) 2 days after we were chatting irrelevant stuff and she called me idiot for no obvious reason and i told her no swear i have feelings and it hurts i asked her: the reason you talk to me is to prove that there is friendship f/m? -no you wanna know the reason? -tell me -because i have a good time with you always it's that simple what about you? -because i felt a click -yes there is a connection between us, we can understand each other and talk about interesting stuff... do you agree? -well it's a little bit complicated... -i know why -why? -cuz you don't believe in OUR friendship(oh god why???) -and you believe -this is what i think... -so bad i m not gonna change my mind... -but why? we are going very good as Friends (oh god why???) what you think??? -( i didn't want to talk to her for what i feel from facebook so i told her you are right...) 12) next day was new years eve, i didn't talk to her , i didn't send wishes , anything. she talked to me on facebook and we chatted a bit . then the conversation gone weird and i told her she is naive , immature and this is bad. (it's bad because she plays with feelings. Doing all this stuff i have told you and then saying oh we are good as friends. **** YOU. ) i was waiting for her to swear at me , but she didn't and i apologised the same day at afternoon saying i was angry at you because of the friend thing... she told me okay i can't understand you... -i can't understand you either, we should talk when we meet. the day after she uploaded a picture on facebook (god she s so beautiful) and i told her that she is and she said: you don't see me for the first time.. i said yes but i haven't seen you for 2 weeks. then just irrelevant talk-talk and here we come today , i m ready to talk to her about how i feel. She came to the city where we study today and i asked her if she wants to talk. she said okay and after a while that she is sleepy. finally she said that she went to bed and that she wants to talk with me , when she wakes up or when she can. and i m here writing this to you... i think she s gonna friendzone me so hard.feelings? thoughts anyone? should i talk to her or you think i will just fail and it's not worth it? Edited January 6, 2013 by LonelyHero it was too long
NoMagicBullet Posted January 7, 2013 Posted January 7, 2013 I hate to say this Lonely Hero, but your post is waaaaaaaaaaay too long (still). I just couldn't read the whole thing of "She did this, then I said that. and she said this," etc, etc, etc. Honestly, it's painful and exhausting to read. I skimmed through your post, and I see that you don't believe in opposite sex friendships, you are interested in this girl, and she seems to think you are just friends. Did I get the gist of it all? You've told her you dont believe in m/f friendships; have you asked her out on a date and has she refused that? Does she insist that you will never be more than friends? I think you're best off telling her straight: "I want to date you, I don't want to be your friend." And if she doesn't want to date you, then accept it and stop talking to her, if you really don't believe in m/f friendships.
NoMagicBullet Posted January 7, 2013 Posted January 7, 2013 Wait a minute, I just found this in your post: "(even though i don't believe i have some girls in my clique and we just go out toghether,drink ,post photos on facebook)" Dude, that's what friends do. Maybe not best friends, but it gives the worng impression of your philosophy. Who are these girls? Exes? FWBs? Your personal harem? How are they not your friends? You're being hypocritical saying you don't believe in m/f freindship. All that aside, I never recommend someone try to be friends with someone they would date, so my advice of telling her you want to date, not be friends, still applies.
Author LonelyHero Posted January 7, 2013 Author Posted January 7, 2013 (edited) thanks for replying , it s surely too long but i wanted to give as much info i can. i can't feel friend feelings for any woman, these girls are just some girls which i hang out, no sex, no feelings , no special conversations. i read what you write and you are right... i don't know maybe i am just f@cked up. maybe i got the problem with the friend thing because someone hurt me too much with this. i had asked her out for a coffee and she came with one gay friend (she told me he was gay)... i have told her some other times to come to a pub i was with friends but she never showed up.. i think i should just ignore her because i am so afraid of talking to her because we talked a lot last month and i developed strong feelings... plus now we have exams at university so i don't want to be destroyed again... (i m wondering why am i doing this with women as i know it s wrong)... Edited January 7, 2013 by LonelyHero
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