crashvector Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 I'm tired of being seen as the "shy nice guy" dammit. I'm tired of being permanantly placed on the "friend list" or treated as though I am disposable. I know its my own fault for letting it happen, but it's never too late to correct a mistake right? I have a LOT to offer and I KNOW it...so why am I so afraid of actually admitting this to myself, or actually ACTING like it? **** this "oh hes suuuch a nice guy" ****. Yes, I am VERY nice and I have always treated the women I have been with VERY well..but I'm also a MAN. Time to hold MYSELF accountable to ensure I am treated like nothing less than what *I* want and deserve dammit. Its time I went after what I want. Screw what everyone else thinks. 3
na49 Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 Preach brother. I'm there with you. So what exactly do you plan on doing to "change"? Because I'm looking for answers too. I'm seen as a "nice guy" and I realize now that it has to change or else I'll never have meaningful relationships with people. They'll keep using me if I allow them to.
happyme Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 Absolutely agree Crash. Go after your love, fight for your love. Don't just walk away assuming that's the way she wants it... at the end of the day neither you or anyone else can possibly 'know' how she will react or what she really feels until you truly find out by 'going for it'. If you truly love her, go for it!
Author crashvector Posted January 5, 2013 Author Posted January 5, 2013 Im tired of being the "nice guy" that always gives too much and gets too little...except for one broken heart after another. Im tired of always being on the platonic list because im so afraid of being seen as just another douchebag guy simply because i want to get naked and feel some boobs with a girl I think is sexy. Im sick and tired....of not getting what i want because im too f*cking afraid to act like im WORTH having 6 or 7 women falling all over themselves to be with me. F*ck right im a good catch! No one will EVER take me for granted again. 1
Author crashvector Posted January 5, 2013 Author Posted January 5, 2013 Absolutely agree Crash. Go after your love, fight for your love. Don't just walk away assuming that's the way she wants it... at the end of the day neither you or anyone else can possibly 'know' how she will react or what she really feels until you truly find out by 'going for it'. If you truly love her, go for it! Me ex is gone. If she asks, i will just tell her"hey look..you either want me or you dont. If not, then good luck finding someone that will treat you as well as i did and tolerate your aloof bullsh*t at the same time. Im off to one of the other 7 or 8 women that are willing to treat me like a man right NOW...no need to beg YOU." 1
Simon Phoenix Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 Absolutely agree Crash. Go after your love, fight for your love. Don't just walk away assuming that's the way she wants it... at the end of the day neither you or anyone else can possibly 'know' how she will react or what she really feels until you truly find out by 'going for it'. If you truly love her, go for it! Don't think that's what he means at all.
beyond Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 Absolutely agree Crash. Go after your love, fight for your love. Don't just walk away assuming that's the way she wants it... at the end of the day neither you or anyone else can possibly 'know' how she will react or what she really feels until you truly find out by 'going for it'. If you truly love her, go for it! NOOOOOOO!!!!! That's the total opposite of what this thread is about. When a someone makes it very clear that they no longer want to be with you - walk away. Find someone worthy of your love.
beyond Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 Im tired of being the "nice guy" that always gives too much and gets too little...except for one broken heart after another. Im tired of always being on the platonic list because im so afraid of being seen as just another douchebag guy simply because i want to get naked and feel some boobs with a girl I think is sexy. Im sick and tired....of not getting what i want because im too f*cking afraid to act like im WORTH having 6 or 7 women falling all over themselves to be with me. F*ck right im a good catch! No one will EVER take me for granted again. The bolded quote above....are you really afraid of being seen like that??? By whom????? Who cares???????? Assuming you are not lying to girls and treating them respectfully then why are you worried???? oh, and *newsflash* Women like getting naked with a guy they think is sexy just as much as men do!
Author crashvector Posted January 5, 2013 Author Posted January 5, 2013 NOOOOOOO!!!!! That's the total opposite of what this thread is about. When a someone makes it very clear that they no longer want to be with you - walk away. Find someone worthy of your love. Goddam right. You bet you f'n ass in a good catch. So, good luck trying to find someone to love you as much as i did and tolerate all your aloof bullsh*t....and save the platitudes while you're at it. Im out.
Author crashvector Posted January 5, 2013 Author Posted January 5, 2013 The bolded quote above....are you really afraid of being seen like that??? By whom????? Who cares???????? Assuming you are not lying to girls and treating them respectfully then why are you worried???? oh, and *newsflash* Women like getting naked with a guy they think is sexy just as much as men do! Yes..bc ive had mostly female friends my whole life, and heard the stuff they say about guys hitting on them.
beyond Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 Yes..bc ive had mostly female friends my whole life, and heard the stuff they say about guys hitting on them. Shall I be really blunt Crash .....maybe you shouldn't listen so much to your female friends. In fact, maybe you have mainly female friends precisely because of the way you act - or rather don't act. Of course we don't want to be 'groped' by men and there are always douchebag guys who are going to try and push it even when we make it clear we have no interest in them. But that isn't what we are talking about here. If you are attracted to someone and she is attracted to you, women LIKE it if you make the move! In fact, if they don't and overly think how to act and what their various friends might say about the situation, to me, would be a complete turn off. I would either walk away or make them my 'friend'....you don't need anymore of those now do you!!!!!
Author crashvector Posted January 5, 2013 Author Posted January 5, 2013 Shall I be really blunt Crash .....maybe you shouldn't listen so much to your female friends. In fact, maybe you have mainly female friends precisely because of the way you act - or rather don't act. Of course we don't want to be 'groped' by men and there are always douchebag guys who are going to try and push it even when we make it clear we have no interest in them. But that isn't what we are talking about here. If you are attracted to someone and she is attracted to you, women LIKE it if you make the move! In fact, if they don't and overly think how to act and what their various friends might say about the situation, to me, would be a complete turn off. I would either walk away or make them my 'friend'....you don't need anymore of those now do you!!!!! Nope. I want one to get naked with and do naughty things to her...in a good way of course. Oh, and preferably one with nice boobs. Lol
beyond Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 Nope. I want one to get naked with and do naughty things to her...in a good way of course. Oh, and preferably one with nice boobs. Lol Nothing wrong with that!;)
Author crashvector Posted January 5, 2013 Author Posted January 5, 2013 Nothing wrong with that!;) you volunteering? lol
Author crashvector Posted January 6, 2013 Author Posted January 6, 2013 im serious...Im just tired of being put into either the "friendship only" or the "I love you because you take care of me" role.
Bumaga vsyo sterpit Posted January 6, 2013 Posted January 6, 2013 Crash I don't think she's gonna be interested forever. She likes you but there are other men out there. Use it or lose it, you know?
Author crashvector Posted January 6, 2013 Author Posted January 6, 2013 Crash I don't think she's gonna be interested forever. She likes you but there are other men out there. Use it or lose it, you know? Meh...now she's playing coy...I dont have time for games.
beyond Posted January 6, 2013 Posted January 6, 2013 you volunteering? lol I think you are probably too young for me :-) Seriously though Crash, I hope you continue with this approach. Have faith in yourself!
happyme Posted January 6, 2013 Posted January 6, 2013 NOOOOOOO!!!!! That's the total opposite of what this thread is about. When a someone makes it very clear that they no longer want to be with you - walk away. Find someone worthy of your love. Oh right. Well, things can apparently move on quickly in that case lol. Crash came on here about a week ago absolutely devastated, broken hearted due to his fiance and love of his life ending the relationship. I didn't realise we're now talking about a totally different woman already. Sorry, don't know what to say to that really. Apart from wow.
beyond Posted January 6, 2013 Posted January 6, 2013 (edited) Oh right. Well, things can apparently move on quickly in that case lol. Crash came on here about a week ago absolutely devastated, broken hearted due to his fiance and love of his life ending the relationship. I didn't realise we're now talking about a totally different woman already. Sorry, don't know what to say to that really. Apart from wow. ? I was talking about his fiance. She dumped him. Why would HE try and persuade HER to try again? This thread is about Crash being tired of being the 'nice guy' and getting walked all over. Begging his ex to start over when she has made it clear she doesn't want to would put him straight back into that weak role again Edited January 6, 2013 by beyond
Author crashvector Posted January 6, 2013 Author Posted January 6, 2013 I think you are probably too young for me :-) Seriously though Crash, I hope you continue with this approach. Have faith in yourself! for the record, my fiance was/is 53.
Author crashvector Posted January 6, 2013 Author Posted January 6, 2013 Oh right. Well, things can apparently move on quickly in that case lol. Crash came on here about a week ago absolutely devastated, broken hearted due to his fiance and love of his life ending the relationship. I didn't realise we're now talking about a totally different woman already. Sorry, don't know what to say to that really. Apart from wow. What? there's no other woman.
Author crashvector Posted January 6, 2013 Author Posted January 6, 2013 ? I was talking about his fiance. She dumped him. Why would HE try and persuade HER to try again? This thread is about Crash being tired of being the 'nice guy' and getting walked all over. Begging his ex to start over when she has made it clear she doesn't want to would put him straight back into that weak role again Its about me being absolutely SICK AND TIRED of me being either put into the "friend zone" or the caretaker zone. I just realized all of a sudden in a moment of clarity: When was my fiance MOST happy and saying very positive things about our relationship? When I was sacrificing my own needs completely in the relationship and taking care of HER. I'm just tired of being "that guy" that gives too much and then has nothing to show for it at the end except for a broken heart. I think its time for me to be a little more selfish...and take care of my OWN needs too.
FailedFirstLove Posted January 6, 2013 Posted January 6, 2013 Probably meeting half way is best. having all ur way won't work either. Annoying that you can't tell what the person is actually like until years later.... By that time u already fell completely head over heels for them. Then they leave you a complete mess
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