darkfire01 Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 I am not sure what to make of this situation. There is a girl I know from work that was getting really flirty with me without me talking to her first. She is a cute girl so I asked her out. Now before we even hung out she asked me to go back to her place with her one night, which I declined as I had other stuff going on. She then texts me that she misses me, which I find odd as we did not even hung out yet. So let’s fast forward a few days and we meet up for a coffee after work. She makes the first move on almost everything, hand holding and even the kiss. We were there for only about an hour then I invited her back to my place and we had sex. Now we are texting back and forth and making plans to get together again. Now, I am starting to like this girl and would be open to a relationship, but I have a few things on my mind. Is she only interested in sex? Is this a sign of some emotional issues she may have that could be a red flag? Could this end up being evolving into a healthy relationship?
soccerrprp Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 Have a calm, light-hearted talk about boundaries, perhaps? She may be excited about being with you and that may be her personality. I would simply say that you should watch and observe and get a feel for her. If she texts, messages incessantly, or demands too much of your time that you are willing to give, you may have a clingy person. Tell her you want to do it right and take it a little slower.
Arabella Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 I think she just really likes you. A woman who is extroverted and really likes a guy may come across as being too forward sometimes, but that's just a way to express herself. I don't think she's just out for sex or she wouldn't be saying things like "I miss you". You have two choices... one, let her sweep you into her tornado and see where things go (who knows, you might just enjoy it ; two, talk to her about it in a light-hearted manner as the above poster suggested, and ask her to tone things down a little bit. Reassure her that you're interested but you have a life Let us know how it goes! -A
Casablanca Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 Tell her you want to do it right and take it a little slower. This, though I'm not really sure how you would slow it down...no sex for a little while? Dunno, perhaps someone has a better idea of what slowing it down would entail here I would be wary that she said she "missed you" as you two hadn't even hung out 1
sagetalk Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 Is she only interested in sex? Is this a sign of some emotional issues she may have that could be a red flag? Could this end up being evolving into a healthy relationship? She may do this with every guy she dates. Which means there could be some emotional issues here. Proceed with caution.
nevertoolate Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 People are different in how fast they warm up and open up to others. Why not ask her about it? Get a better feel for her relationship history and what she is looking for with you now. Be patient and just listen to what she says. If you don't talk to her about your concerns, you can only assume and make judgments which may be far from the truth. Talk to her if you like her, get her story and go from there.
carhill Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 How old? What's her relationship history? Is she only interested in sex? Is this a sign of some emotional issues she may have that could be a red flag? Could this end up being evolving into a healthy relationship? Perhaps.
Author darkfire01 Posted January 5, 2013 Author Posted January 5, 2013 She is in her early 20s and has had a few long term relationships and a few flings, which does not bother me at all, I like when women are open with their sexuality. I am 26. When I first got with her I did not really have any expectations, I was just going along for the ride to see where it would lead to. As for her, my take on it is that she was at first looking for just a one night stand as she invited me to spend the night before we even hung out. I think that after we had sex and cuddled she started to get attached because that is when she started sending me sweet texts. We both work full time and take college classes, so I made the comment that I don’t know how well our schedules will work together. She replied to that by saying, “we can work something out, I promise”. When we talk on the phone she also brings up things we can do “down the road”.
veggirl Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 Oh yeah...so you guys have hung out once and she is already planning your relationship and how things will go in the future. She's desperate or she jumps in fast and probably fizzles just as fast!
What_A_Hoot Posted January 5, 2013 Posted January 5, 2013 Yeah... I would have that talk with her that things might be moving too fast for your taste and you want to slow things down. If she really likes you, then she will at least be willing to give it a shot. If not, well, I think you got your answer there.
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