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Is an escort considered an OW?


SouthernBelleXXX

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That is a hard question. I have never been with an escort, but if there was no emotional involvement, it would hard for me to say it is officially an OW.

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I would consider it a different type of cheating as there is usually no emotional connection.

 

It is more of a business transaction than a relationship.

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Not judging you, but judging men who pay for women. I find paying for sex the lowest thing a man can do. At least with regular cheating, the guy has to be charming enough to get a woman. He has to put some sort of effort into it.

 

How do you deal with the STD risk? Did you just accept that you'll get anything under the sun?

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SouthernBelleXXX

How do you deal with the STD risk? Did you just accept that you'll get anything under the sun?

 

Key to this is not having sex with everyone under the sun and using condoms.

I don't work for an agency or walk the streets or have a pimp so I'm very picky about who I will and will not see.

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Not judging you, but judging men who pay for women. I find paying for sex the lowest thing a man can do. At least with regular cheating, the guy has to be charming enough to get a woman. He has to put some sort of effort into it.

 

 

I find this comment rather interesting. So, instead of just paying someone to get down, you think it is more admirable to actually play someone?

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I find paying for sex the lowest thing a man can do. At least with regular cheating, the guy has to be charming enough to get a woman. He has to put some sort of effort into it.

 

 

So you would rather that your SO chooses an affair over paying for sex?

 

In an affair, he would get emotionally attached to the woman (most likely) where visiting an escort would be an hour or so of sex and the relationship is over.

 

If he truly missed sex, then wouldn't this be better? And if he simply wanted companionship, then isn't paying for that better than developing a relationship?

 

Just a perspective.

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SouthernBelleXXX
Not judging you, but judging men who pay for women. I find paying for sex the lowest thing a man can do. At least with regular cheating, the guy has to be charming enough to get a woman. He has to put some sort of effort into it.

 

I find this comment rather interesting. So, instead of just paying someone to get down, you think it is more admirable to actually play someone?

 

I find it very interesting.

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At least in an escort situation both sides know what is up.

 

Okay...this begs for a joke or two! :laugh:

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Okay...this begs for a joke or two! :laugh:

 

Or three or four. :) But the reality is true. There is no premise of anything but sex.

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My definition would be that the man seeing the escort is engaging in infidelity, sexual infidelity, similar to that of ONS and NSA sex in a non-paying situation. In the classic sense of the way the term 'other woman' is used on LoveShack in the Infidelity and OW/OM forums, IMO, no, an escort is not an 'other woman'.

 

If the client and escort develop an emotional attachment through their sexual activities and the dynamic moves from an arm's length disinterested business relationship to a personal one, then OW would match up better with what is commonly discussed on LS. Though extant, there are exceedingly few posters here who have NSA arrangements with their MP's. The vast majority engage in some level of interpersonal relationship. If that is indicative of the wider statistics, there would be more dissimilarities between escorts and OW's than similarities. One glaring dissimilarity would be the numbers of diverse sexual partners an active escort engages with in any given time period versus an OW. Sex is her business and diverse volume provides income. Very few escorts do the 'Pretty Woman' thing and are 'owned' by one man, IMO. The main similarity would be the generally secretive nature of their individual encounters, presuming we're discussing hidden sexual relations.

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No an escort cannot be the other woman. Also if a man is paying you for sex and your company but thinks of you as his gf he is an idiot. In fact he's already pretty stupid in my book for using an escort, but even stupider if he considers one his gf. Good for you if you've found such a stupid man he'll be paying you all he has and more in no time.

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yes....I think you are in that Iwould definitely consider it cheating and you would be the other woman he cheated with, whether he paid for it or not.

 

just as I am sure he would consider me paying for a male escort and keeping it secret, cheating.

 

Othe man or other woman just denotes the person you cheated with, whether for money or not.

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Marriage includes not having sex with other people. Being physically intimate with another person is cheating, so an escort is an OW even if only for one night.

 

James, I have noticed a definite shift in some of your thinking when I read your posts. Are you on the verge of cheating? I only ask because your posts are suddenly filled with rationalizations for being unfaithful.

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BrokenPrincess

Yes it's obviously cheating but I don't think an escort is an OW in the proper noun sense.

 

Question though...for everything I read on here that As are all really just about ego boost and external validation, does that mean the cheating party is even MORE broken since he/she is able to fill that need with an escort despite knowing they are paying for the attention, it's not even genuine?

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Anyone who your spouse has romantic or sexual contact with is considered an OW/OM. No matter how long the contact is, whether for an hour, weeks, months or years. It's still infidelity, and you are enabling a MM to cheat on his wife and be unfaithful to his wife, and you are damaging their marriage by your willingness to accommodate him.

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I suppose we could debate all day if an escort is an OW/OM, I tend to agree that they are. The difference is; the escort gets paid for doing the deed with the WS, whereas the non-escort OW/OM generally gets nothing but heartache and pain in the end, basically just giving up their goods for free.

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James, I have noticed a definite shift in some of your thinking when I read your posts. Are you on the verge of cheating? I only ask because your posts are suddenly filled with rationalizations for being unfaithful.

 

Actually, my posts come from a number of angles. No, I am not rationalizing so that I can go cheat. I am simply giving another perspective.

 

My marriage is much better. :) I have commented on this in a few of my posts, too.

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SoutherBelleXXX;

I am curious what YOU think about your thread question?

 

Since (& correct me if I'm wrong) this is your "job", do you view the sex as just your job "responsibility"?

 

Is there intimacy w/your client/customer base?

 

Do you have or have you had significant others in your life that understand your job description and are able to compartmentalize and differentiate their relationship with you and yours w/your client base?

 

Do you consider your job responsibilities to be customer care or more number crunching like a CPA?

 

And most enlightening, would you be okay w/your SO having the same/similar occupation?

 

Please know that None of my questions are meant in a derogetory manner* your field of expertise is just one I am not familiar with, so I'm trying to see it as you do. :)

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That underscores a marked difference between an escort and a OW, both in function and psychology. The man *feels* differently about the two and *acts* differently. It would follow that, if so, they're *different*. :)

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Actually, my posts come from a number of angles. No, I am not rationalizing so that I can go cheat. I am simply giving another perspective.

 

My marriage is much better. :) I have commented on this in a few of my posts, too.

 

Glad to hear that your marriage is much better! :cool:

 

I hope that you and your wife have started to enjoy lovemaking, as I know that was one of the main issues.

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