I will get her back, strong love was there.

[SuperGeek]

Guys, you are all f.cuking amazing for helping me, but i'm getting her back.

 

So,

 

1. she clearly still gets my emails. if i keep emailing, im her backup, plan b. if i stop, she finally has a chance to miss me, although thats pointless because she is in uni and wants to move on anyway.

 

2. do i write her a letter and post it valentines day?

 

3. do i write her a letter and post it in summer?

 

p.s. she may have called the cop shop because i turned up at her college, she may have changed her number because i went nuts on the texts after being rejected, but i sure as hell am not being arrested, and if she isn't getting my emails, then a letter here or there isn't harassment.

 

Here is a reality check for you and it's going to be hard to read. Your ex is in college and probably was done months ago and is probably out whoring it up as I type this post. That's typically how it works in college, especially if it's a party school.

 

Secondly, If you want her back, you aren't doing yourself any favors by begging for her to come back. She will see it as weak and it will just push her away even more. If you want any chance in hell at getting her back you need to stop contacting her completely. No contact at all, just drop off the damn grid when it comes to her. Don't talk to her friends either. Women do not respect needy men 99% of the time and it's just a biological wiring in their brains (if women are offended by what i'm saying here, tough sh*t... it's completely true).

 

You sound like you're both in college so statistically a long term relationship is probably going to be hard to find right now. I'm in my mid-30s and would just about pay anything to be back in college right now and I'd be partying my ass off, because after college it's jobs, bills, and taxes my friend. Enjoy it while it lasts and stop worrying about this girl.

 

Finally and most importantly, do not stalk your ex g/f. She has the power to completely f*ck you up legally. She can get a restraining order against you or file charges against you and that kind of crap is really costly to get removed off your record. Even if you get the charges dropped, they are still on your record in some way or another and we are in the information age now where everything you do is logged and put in a database somewhere (even the last dump you took in your dorm is probably logged into some google database in the "cloud"). Any charge will impact you getting a job later and you will be kicking yourself for it so i hope you really think about what you're doing. Being like Ashton Kutcher and singing to a girl out in the rain with a guitar might work in Hollywood movies, but it gets you arrested and put in the county mental institution in real life. Do yourself a favor and let it go before you damage your future. Also, emails can be used in court to show harassment, so cut it out man.

 

SuperGeek

Edited January 7, 2013 by SuperGeek

[Renard99]

Here is a reality check for you and it's going to be hard to read. Your ex is in college and probably was done months ago and is probably out whoring it up as I type this post. That's typically how it works in college, especially if it's a party school.

 

Secondly, If you want her back, you aren't doing yourself any favors by begging for her to come back. She will see it as weak and it will just push her away even more. If you want any chance in hell at getting her back you need to stop contacting her completely. No contact at all, just drop off the damn grid when it comes to her. Don't talk to her friends either. Women do not respect needy men 99% of the time and it's just a biological wiring in their brains (if women are offended by what i'm saying here, tough sh*t... it's completely true).

 

You sound like you're both in college so statistically a long term relationship is probably going to be hard to find right now. I'm in my mid-30s and would just about pay anything to be back in college right now and I'd be partying my ass off, because after college it's jobs, bills, and taxes my friend. Enjoy it while it lasts and stop worrying about this girl.

 

Finally and most importantly, do not stalk your ex g/f. She has the power to completely f*ck you up legally. She can get a restraining order against you or file charges against you and that kind of crap is really costly to get removed off your record. Even if you get the charges dropped, they are still on your record in some way or another and we are in the information age now where everything you do is logged and put in a database somewhere (even the last dump you took in your dorm is probably logged into some google database in the "cloud"). Any charge will impact you getting a job later and you will be kicking yourself for it so i hope you really think about what you're doing. Being like Ashton Kutcher and singing to a girl out in the rain with a guitar might work in Hollywood movies, but it gets you arrested and put in the county mental institution in real life. Do yourself a favor and let it go before you damage your future. Also, emails can be used in court to show harassment, so cut it out man.

 

SuperGeek

 

That is all excellent advice, but unfortunately, all he wants to hear to the 3 points he's posted are:-

1) yes, she does get your emails and loves reading everyone. She knows you're there and is just waiting for the best time to stop what she's doing and come straight back to you.

 

2) yes, send the letter for valentines day

 

3) yes, send the letter in the summer

 

Anything else will fall on deaf ears I'm afraid.

[Sav]

Where's mah favourite boy? I need my daily dose of Fred!!!! Or is he finally behind bars

[frederickkk]

im here mate.

 

ive decided to stop emailing.

 

sent my last 1 last night.

 

i cant really do anymore.

 

if she loved me, she would want to be with me.

 

she had all her own problems in the relationship.

 

i didn't neglect her, just had to study.

 

this girl was deeply in love with me, and will probably be sleeping around to get over it.

 

i don't know if i will ever hear from her, very unlikely after what I have done.

 

But regardless of the damage, she will, at some point, contact me. I can't see her going through life, to her death's door, without a single peep. She will want my friendship, or something to make her happy, and I will deny her that. There would have to be a "I miss you, I love you, and I want you back".

 

 

the way i went about it, sure i nearly risked a RO, but she didn't do that. She called police out of an irrational decision, something to scare me off.

 

 

I'm a good looking guy, but out of shape. 6 months in the gym and full moon parties Thailand in the Summer will hopefully help me get over her. But who am I kidding? I will never get over her. I will always be in love with her.

[frederickkk]

That is all excellent advice, but unfortunately, all he wants to hear to the 3 points he's posted are:-

1) yes, she does get your emails and loves reading everyone. She knows you're there and is just waiting for the best time to stop what she's doing and come straight back to you.

 

2) yes, send the letter for valentines day

 

3) yes, send the letter in the summer

 

Anything else will fall on deaf ears I'm afraid.

 

and why is that?

[spaniard]

and why is that?

 

Because you are deeply, madly in love with this amazing, flawless British woman. And you'll love her forever for the rest of your life, which is - considering that you are 25 now and the life expectancy for British males is 78.1 years - approximately 53.1 years.

 

What an amazing love story, frederickkk.

[Renard99]

and why is that?

 

Because we've told you the exact opposite of those three points I wrote and you've totally and utterly ignored that advice.

 

As Spaniard has said, you're deeply and madly in love with this woman (despite her making it blindingly obvious she no longer feels the same way about you). You've stated many times that you're not going to do the normal things, you're going to do it your way to win her back going against everything everyone has said on here.

 

You keep asking questions and not liking the answers so I wrote, in those three points, what you really want to hear from us. Why else would you be asking the question when you know the answers aren't what you want to hear because you're doing it 'your way'

Edited January 7, 2013 by Renard99

[Renard99]

im here mate.

 

ive decided to stop emailing.

 

sent my last 1 last night.

 

i cant really do anymore.

 

if she loved me, she would want to be with me.

 

she had all her own problems in the relationship.

 

i didn't neglect her, just had to study.

 

this girl was deeply in love with me, and will probably be sleeping around to get over it.

 

i don't know if i will ever hear from her, very unlikely after what I have done.

 

But regardless of the damage, she will, at some point, contact me. I can't see her going through life, to her death's door, without a single peep. She will want my friendship, or something to make her happy, and I will deny her that. There would have to be a "I miss you, I love you, and I want you back".

 

 

the way i went about it, sure i nearly risked a RO, but she didn't do that. She called police out of an irrational decision, something to scare me off.

 

 

I'm a good looking guy, but out of shape. 6 months in the gym and full moon parties Thailand in the Summer will hopefully help me get over her. But who am I kidding? I will never get over her. I will always be in love with her.

 

And this is another reason why you want to hear those three points..... you go through this whole thing about saying how you've changed, seen the error of your ways and listened to everything we've said.......then throw that last line in and say.... nope, not really, I'm still the same way

 

You're sailing close to the wind when it comes to trolling my friend, very close.

Edited January 7, 2013 by Renard99

[Zammo25]

She is GONE. Like my ex has gone.

 

She does not give a Rat's ar*e about me like your ex does not care about you.

 

Time to LET GO now.

 

I know in my heart one day when the new Mr Wonderful's Halo slips she may think about me. One day.

 

By then I hope I could not give a toss anymore.

 

She made her bed and she has to lye in it now.

 

No one is perfect, no matter what she thinks now and after 6 months people will start to annoy each other. That is life. It is only true love that gets through this.

 

We will see if the Mr Wonderful is true love. Maybe it is but I don't want to care anymore.

 

I deserve better as I have a huge heart, am a decent Man and would literally take a bullet for my loved one.

 

I know this.

[Renard99]

She is GONE. Like my ex has gone.

 

She does not give a Rat's ar*e about me like your ex does not care about you.

 

Time to LET GO now.

 

I know in my heart one day when the new Mr Wonderful's Halo slips she may think about me. One day.

 

By then I hope I could not give a toss anymore.

 

She made her bed and she has to lye in it now.

 

No one is perfect, no matter what she thinks now and after 6 months people will start to annoy each other. That is life. It is only true love that gets through this.

 

We will see if the Mr Wonderful is true love. Maybe it is but I don't want to care anymore.

 

I deserve better as I have a huge heart, am a decent Man and would literally take a bullet for my loved one.

 

I know this.

 

That's the perfect way to look at this my friend........ Fred, you should take note of this.

[SuperGeek]

My ex left my ass 2 years 4 months ago. i've delt with it and let it go. Yes at first it was pain like i've never experienced but it does pass. Occasionally I do still think about her, but it's different now and more of a 'hey i wonder what she's doing?' kind of a thing. I never act on those thoughts. I am fully committed to NC and will keep it that way for the future.

 

Now if I could just get over those blasted trust issues.... i'd be fully recovered. :/ I get better every day though. It's not a linear progression by any means, but overall between 2 years 4 months ago and now, I'm a different man and much better. NC helped wit this. Getting away and healing was key to it all, at least for me.

 

Supergeek

 

She is GONE. Like my ex has gone.

 

She does not give a Rat's ar*e about me like your ex does not care about you.

 

Time to LET GO now.

 

I know in my heart one day when the new Mr Wonderful's Halo slips she may think about me. One day.

 

By then I hope I could not give a toss anymore.

 

She made her bed and she has to lye in it now.

 

No one is perfect, no matter what she thinks now and after 6 months people will start to annoy each other. That is life. It is only true love that gets through this.

 

We will see if the Mr Wonderful is true love. Maybe it is but I don't want to care anymore.

 

I deserve better as I have a huge heart, am a decent Man and would literally take a bullet for my loved one.

 

I know this.

[portableversion]

ah i think hes coping in his own way, of course nothing said here will change ol fred. he will move on at his own pace. he dont care what anyone here says, this is his journal entry. its his documentation of pain and suffering,

 

an electronic tablet recording the gore of his shattered heart. A document revealing his inner most thoughts and feelings as best as he can describe it. Hang in ther fred one day if we manage to not kill our selves, we will check out of this place and it will be over and done. lets just hope we dont get reincarnated ok.

 

Who would want to come back to this and run the risk of experienceing this crap all over again? Not me I want out now, but i have to live for my boys. Its a horrible thing you are going thru. This disaster you experience is proof that we live in a broken world. Its ok man your not alone. The tears if you do cry are not shed in solitude, like the single rain drops from a storm they unite with all the others and form a river probably more mighty than the amazon river in south america.

 

It hurts and its bad and its not cool, but this this is the world we live in.

IM sure everyone has faults which end up hurting someone else. All I can think of fred is try to think of ways in which you had hurt this girl and drive her away. Perhaps she is purely selfish and just was not into you, but definitely meditate and try to uncover anything you did to hurt her and try not to ever ever repeat it.

Edited January 16, 2013 by portableversion