wonderingsoul22 Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 When I say stuff I actually only mean his house/work keys that he left at my house when he wasn't actually supposed to be at mine because he had a new gf which I was totally oblivious to, I thought we was getting back together only to have to him walk out and go distant on me. Throwing lines such as 'I don't know if we can go back to the way we were' followed by 'I want us to go back to the way we were, I really do' followed by 'I'm confused' 'I don't know what I want' followed by 'I'm sorry it is has to end up like this' he dragged this out for over a week with lots of NC in between and telling me he'd call me and not doing so, until eventually he told me 'You know you deserve better than what I can offer you, so just get over me' and pretty much cut of contact all together after that. We'd had that discussion many a times about me deserving better. Anyway, he had denied seeing anyone else. Text my mum to wish her a merry christmas, hoping she had a good one - knowing full well my mum tells me everything, which kind of pee'd me off because he'd told me to get over him, why text my mum at 1am after his gf had gone home and he was on his own. One of his family members finally informed me he was seeing someone new and had been all that time. I have actually only recently got back in contact with this family member as I had detatched myself from this family member for certain reasons and I told him why, which he promised to keep a secret but he went and mentioned it to them christmas day and alls it did was make the person apologise and get back in contact with me so I am now involved back in his family... I have tried contacting him again wishing them both the best and asking him what he wants to do about his keys, I know he wants them desperately as he's been begging family members to get them for him. He says he'll get them, but he's said that so many times I just don't see it happening. He's even avoiding places where we both hang out when he knows I am there. He knows I am not the sort that would cause problems nor trouble for him. We have been through much worse, he has faced me after he cheated, after I accused him of giving me an std and was awaiting the results, he met me when I asked him to thinking it was about my results, so he has faced worse with me. Yet he can't face me now? I just feel like they are hanging over me and he is just making it more difficult than it has to be. I've also found out he's been bad mouthing me and my mum to his family and new gf. Any advice on what I should do or how I can make him collect them as I feel like they are lingering over me always there for him to get 'one day'
geegirl Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Why is this so difficult? Place them in a padded envelope or box, and mail them to him. End of story. 1
KatZee Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Or throw it out. This doesn't need to be a whole thread. He won't get it? Toss it. Not your problem.
stillafool Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 I agree with the other posters. Your problem can be over today. Put them in an envelope and be done with them all. Good Luck!
carhill Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Welcome to LS You're lucky. It took two moving vans to 'return' my exW's stuff Simply mail his items to him, with tracking/signature, to confirm receipt. Since they're keys, I'd pay extra for that, to ensure he gets them. Then change your contact information and proceed with NC to heal. Good luck.
veggirl Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Way too much drama over keys. Obviously he doesn't actually need them as he's been surviving just fine w/o them. Throw them away or mail them to him.
KatZee Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Simply mail his items to him, with tracking/signature, to confirm receipt. Since they're keys, I'd pay extra for that, to ensure he gets them. Then change your contact information and proceed with NC to heal. Good luck. Way too much effort for someone who's badmouthing not only her, but her family to his new girlfriend. I'd light that s.hit on fire, honestly. And agreed. He's fine without those things, so toss it out the window.
carhill Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Sure, she can do that, and then she has taken the same path as him. Up to her if that's the path she wants in life. Many choices are available.
KatZee Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Sure, she can do that, and then she has taken the same path as him. Up to her if that's the path she wants in life. Many choices are available. Not really. He wouldn't even know she did it. It would just be cleansing for her.
carhill Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 She would know. This is the kind of insight into a person's psyche which is valuable information. 1
KatZee Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 She would know. This is the kind of insight into a person's psyche which is valuable information. And I'm sure she'd feel great getting that garbage out of her place.
carhill Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 More good information, primarily about feelings trumping propriety. Since the OP has disappeared and is new, I'll assume this is a hit and run thread so adios.
blotter Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Throw them into the garbage, where he threw your relationship.
LostOne1 Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Well me sending my ex's stuff back didn't help at all. Made things worse actually, because her parents ended up opening it all and I guess her dad didn't fully know she was seeing me. Or they read my letter and realized how she hurt me. All I know is I got lots of hateful msg from her afterwards. Some what regret it.. BUT it also helped me move on, because I had no major thing left of hers to remind me of her. I have no idea how and why she kept my stuff as memories after BU with me. I thought if she was with someone else or what not she would toss my stuff I'd given her away.
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