Hurt21 Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 I discovered this site after my break up and have been a frequent vistor. I love reading the advice and kind words you folks give and I really need some kind words myself. The story: This is a female and female relationship...so if that offends anyone, please don't continue to read. Anyway, we were together almost 3 years. She broke up with me a week before our anniversary. At the time she said she wanted to focus on school and basketball. She is a senior, we went to the same school. I graduated already. We talked over the next couple weeks and her reasons for the breakup changed repeatedly. It was now that she wasn't feeling how she use to. We are too different. I didn't "show" her I loved her. However, she promised that she just needed time and would be back. Fast forward another week or so and now she tells me that its over for good. She assured me there was no one else. I told her we were going NC..she said ok. However, she continued to txt and call and offer her "breadcrumbs" I allowed this as I was feeling hopeful about us. Big mistake. Fast forward to today, well last night really. I hadn't spoken to her in a few weeks. I was hanging out with a friend of mine named Jas and she filled me in on the ex. Turns out she is already in another relationship. She is now the girlfriend of Jas's ex-girlfriend. So she breaks up with me Oct 11, and was in a new relationship Nov 16....wow. Just wow. I was at a loss for words. Angry, devastated, disappointed...just hurt. I called my ex (crazy I know) and asked her about it. She said it was true and I hung up. My friend told me that my ex had wanted her ex all along. So why stay with me for almost 3 years? Right now, I can't put into words how devastated I am. She repeatedly lied to me about being with someone else. She even took money from me when I was trying to help her out. The thought of them keeps running through my mind. I literally feel sick to my stomach. How do you possibly jump into a relationship that quickly? Why keep calling and txting me if she was already with someone else? She will never hear from me again. My number will be changed in the morning. I told her as much. If anyone out there could offer some kind words that would be greatly appreciated. I really need them right now. Hurt beyond words.
TaraMaiden Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 These may not be the words you want to hear, but you know what? people are people, wherever you go. This happens all the time.... Your ex- held a flame for someone else, but it wasn't the right time... When the right time presented itself, she acted and followed her heart. When IS the Right Time'...? There is NO right time. It's just a time that happens, and people take it. You've done the right thing, to sever all contact. Now what you have to do, is sever any resentment, animosity, anger and hatred. Because they will consume you, and fester in your soul, until they eat away at every ounce of goodness and love you could give someone else. And that WOULD be wrong.
MyAngel Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Oh sweetie I'm so sorry. To know that she's moved on so quickly and jumped straight in to another relationship is crushing. Especially when you would have been rightfully upset and missing her - and she's just off with someone else?? Truly awful You are doing the right thing by cutting contact. You need to forget about her, heal and move on. There's so many loving, kind women out there for you to love. One that will love you back and treat you the way you deserve. Xxxxxx
Author Hurt21 Posted January 4, 2013 Author Posted January 4, 2013 Tara: While that is definitely hard to read and accept, you couldn't be more right. That's life. And sometimes life just doesn't go your way. I thank you for taking the time to respond to my post. MyAngel: Thank you for your kind words. I believe in God, and I will stay in prayer about this. I truly believe everything happens for a reason. This has knocked me down definitely, but it won't knock me out. I look forward to the day when I will have let this go. I'll take it one day at a time and continue to move forward.
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