tori0001 Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 The last time we talked was a week ago. We talked about his pre surgery blood tests and another health test he will need done. These tests will have been done last Friday. He said he will let me know when the results come in.Then silence, not a word from him for a week.I'm not sure what to think. I wont chase him. I'm up set and confused.
TaraMaiden Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Who's this, your ex? The one you still think about and have feelings for? You need to do one of two things tori: You either need to contact him and wish him well, but tell him that your priorities now lie in a different direction and that while you hope his health improves and stabilises, you cannot devote your time to being a health monitor for him. Or - Seriously, you need to break up with your current BF because this division of emotions is dreadfully unfair on his heart. He has devoted himself 100% to a relationship with you, yet you persist in withholding part of your emotional heart, from him. When it comes to rational decisions, never permit emotions to make them for you.
crashvector Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Only way to know is ask. Usually, couples on a temp break meet to discuss "ground rules" for the break.
TaraMaiden Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 (edited) Crash, she broke up with this guy a loooong time ago - but she still holds a light for him - and is in another 'committed' relationship. It's going to end in tears for someone, sadly.... Edited January 3, 2013 by TaraMaiden
crashvector Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Crash, she broke up with this guy a loooong time ago - but she still holds a light for him - and is in another 'committed' relationship. It's going to end in tears for someone, sadly.... Oh sh*t. Yeah..mr committed relationship guys gonna get his heart broken is what is gonna happen. Dude...that is SERIOUSLY really sh*tty of you to do this to him.
Author tori0001 Posted January 3, 2013 Author Posted January 3, 2013 This is s committed relationship. We have been seeing each other for 5 months. Ever since I found out he was sick, I have always been there, but again, I won't Chase him if he decides not to communicate. It's not fair.
crashvector Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 This is s committed relationship. We have been seeing each other for 5 months. Ever since I found out he was sick, I have always been there, but again, I won't Chase him if he decides not to communicate. It's not fair. And YOU are okay with emotional deception. Good luck with that...and trying to build a life with someone in your house of cards. I just feel for this poor bastard...he has no idea you are essentially lying to him.
TaraMaiden Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 This is s committed relationship. We have been seeing each other for 5 months. Ever since I found out he was sick, I have always been there, but again, I won't Chase him if he decides not to communicate. It's not fair. If this is the committed relationship, I would be by his side 24/7 and super-glued to his hand!! He may well be feeling alone, frightened uncertain and facing the unknown - and you're waiting on him?? I'm sorry tori, you have an odd idea of what a committed relationship is, then. That's all I have to say. I'm outta here.
Author tori0001 Posted January 3, 2013 Author Posted January 3, 2013 What am I lying to him about, I have been nothing but good to him and love him.
chloe1408 Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 When i was with my previous boyfriend he made a comment about how he was gutted that his ex had moved in with someone new. It made me feel like my heart had been trodden on I cant imagine how your boyfriend will feel when he finds out youve been holding a candle and waiting by the phone for him to get in touch. Have you spoken to your current boyfriend? As if you are hiding it it will come out eventually.
crashvector Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 If this is the committed relationship, I would be by his side 24/7 and super-glued to his hand!! He may well be feeling alone, frightened uncertain and facing the unknown - and you're waiting on him?? I'm sorry tori, you have an odd idea of what a committed relationship is, then. That's all I have to say. I'm outta here. This. My.fiancee.never left my side the entire 3 months i was paralyzed. I never left her side the entire 6 months she was getting chemo. You need to grow up.
Author tori0001 Posted January 3, 2013 Author Posted January 3, 2013 He went silent on me. Decided on not answering my texts. What am I suppose to do.
crashvector Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 He went silent on me. Decided on not answering my texts. What am I suppose to do. I would too if you abandoned me...or had feelings for some other guy.
TaraMaiden Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Go. To. HIM. Send him a text: "I'm coming to be with you." How hard is that?? I would think he has a lot on his mind right now, and frankly, a GF who stands off for no reason he can think of or know, would be another worry. You don't need an ok to act on impulse for someone you are totally in love with and committed to - do you??
crashvector Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Go. To. HIM. Send him a text: "I'm coming to be with you." How hard is that?? I would think he has a lot on his mind right now, and frankly, a GF who stands off for no reason he can think of or know, would be another worry. You don't need an ok to act on impulse for someone you are totally in love with and committed to - do you?? Lol do the have "how to not abandon the person you love for dummies" ? Lol
Author tori0001 Posted January 3, 2013 Author Posted January 3, 2013 It's my bf who is sick, I Wm not waiting by my phone for my ex. Nor would I evet. My bf went silent after talking about texts. Right now he's not answering me, I wad wondering could he be taking s break and needs his own space.
TaraMaiden Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 ...Sorry - are you actually reading the responses?? Why are you even waiting?? If the guy is preoccupied with medical problems, phukk text etiquette - go to him!!
Author tori0001 Posted January 3, 2013 Author Posted January 3, 2013 I can't go see him, first off he'd long distance. He went to stay half way across the country to be with his brother shod a surgeon. I'm self employef, and right now funds are low for taking time off, and too costly to fly. I font have it.I
Author tori0001 Posted January 3, 2013 Author Posted January 3, 2013 I was hoping be would contact me. If someone goes silent it would lead you to believe they need to be left alone. I font want to seem pushy. I was wondering how to handle it. Leave him be, or not.
chloe1408 Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 It might sound abit like playing games but when I think someone doesn’t care I pull back a little bit. Its kind of a mini test to see how they react If they notice and sit down and ask what is wrong and see if there is anything they can to do help then you know they care If they just say “I’ll give you your space”, well to me they don’t really care that much. I think maybe he is waiting foryou to show you do care You don’t need to be there physically. Send him a text saying that he is never far from your mind and that you want to speak to him, that its silly you not talking when he means so much to you.
Author tori0001 Posted January 3, 2013 Author Posted January 3, 2013 Like I said, he was the one who stopped. I will send him a text, saying thinking of of you, you're ndver far from my thoughts.
Author tori0001 Posted January 3, 2013 Author Posted January 3, 2013 (edited) He has not responded to my text. I have no idea how he is, or why he has not responded. I don't want to seem like I'm bothering him.Thanks for all the advice. Edited January 3, 2013 by tori0001
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