Jms3 Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 My boyfriend and I have dated for 7 years now, since HS and throughout college. We have both cheated throughout the relationship and never broke up. I cheated most recently, once, two years ago (something I NEVER thought I'd do) when I fell for someone that was giving me the emotional connection I was lacking. I was honest and admitted it and my bf and I continued our relationship. After moving in together I experienced the "grass is greener syndrome". I thought about it constantly so I broke up with my bf for the first time. it lasted about a month and I was reeled back in after a talk about how our communication would become a priority along with our sex life and making more memorable experiences with each other as a more mature couple. Three months back together and I'm experiencing GIGS again. I sort of think I regret getting back together so soon but I can't bring it up because it wouldn't go well at all. Im extremely close to his family and when we broke up for that month they basically shut me out, not to mention we share all the same friends. I gained everyone's trust back and I can't imagine what would happen a second time. My bf and I get along great and he's more in love with me than ever but I'm bored and I find myself questioning whether I'm sexually attracted to him or would want to say yes if he proposed, which is obviously a big deal. I'm being a jerk and not treating him how he should be treated. Little things bug me and our interests/feelings/thoughts are differing as we grow. I want everything to be great but can't force it if its not there. What if its just a phase? I could ultimately make the biggest mistake of my life without someone who would make a great husband and life partner. However the biggest problem I face is that I constantly think about the person I cheated with 2 years ago and i don't know why. He doesn't contact me or ask to be in my life. But for some reason I text or call him sometimes and it's selfish of me. i could really use an explanation as to why he is the only person ive ever considered and why i cant get him off my mind. My brain makes me believe i think about him for a reason like he's the one for me. It's almost an unhealthy obsession. If this were true,my life would be completely opposite and i would lose many people I care about. After reading other posts, I don't want this to get worse after I'm married with children. I would appreciate any advice. I'm just extremely confused and fed up with my brain. :/ J*
Sav Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 I think it's just a classic case of not treasuring what you have. I was in the same situation. She was the one constantly showering me with love, I was ungrateful and kept thinking of my ex, kept texting my ex. One day she broke up with me, and I realized what I lost but it was too late. However, if you feel this way, I think you should end the relationship. Tell him how you feel 100%. It's the least you could do for someone who stuck with you through thick and thin for so long. Then again, I would never advice anyone to stay in a relationship when they think they can do better or is not 100% committed. It's unfair to the other party. Let him go
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