bluefairy812 Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 Letting go hurts so much. Like a piece of our hearts being ripped out of our bodies. I almost want to accept it all but then feelings come back. Just went i think i accept.... i can't. is it because we are afraid of what is to come? I know I don't want to know anything about him. Nothing. It hurts too much. Little by little I'm accepting but then feelings just get in the way. Why is it hard to let go? I heard somewhere it's a good thing to treat a breakup like a death. Have a funeral. Buy some balloons and let them go into the sky as a way of letting go. What happens to all the love you have to give? I only hold on to it for him... He doesn't want it so what am I supposed to do? Sorry guys, just had to let it out. I prefer to vent here than to contact my ex. It's about to be six months out of a 4 year relationship and I still feel like this. I have good days and bad days and today has been one of those bad ones. 1
becks77 Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 Sorry to hear you're having a tough time - I had a bad day today too - thought I was well on the road to recovery and then I went on a date last night which was way too soon (only been NC for 5 weeks) and it made me think about my ex and compare the new guy to him. Sucks! So I had a terrible day where I started going over all the things I liked and didn't like about my ex... How long have you been NC? Has he tried to contact you? How do you know he was the 'one'? Sometimes thinking about that can make you realise that he wasn't. It's still very hard though.
Treasa Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 Letting go hurts so much. Like a piece of our hearts being ripped out of our bodies. I almost want to accept it all but then feelings come back. Just went i think i accept.... i can't. is it because we are afraid of what is to come? I know I don't want to know anything about him. Nothing. It hurts too much. Little by little I'm accepting but then feelings just get in the way. Why is it hard to let go? I heard somewhere it's a good thing to treat a breakup like a death. Have a funeral. Buy some balloons and let them go into the sky as a way of letting go. What happens to all the love you have to give? I only hold on to it for him... He doesn't want it so what am I supposed to do? Sorry guys, just had to let it out. I prefer to vent here than to contact my ex. It's about to be six months out of a 4 year relationship and I still feel like this. I have good days and bad days and today has been one of those bad ones. Give that love to yourself. The more whole I've been, the happier I've been with myself and my life, the less I've grieved over relationships or stayed in bad ones. 4
Sarahbee Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 Having some kind of release ritual is not a bad idea. I've done that and while it's not a miracle cure, it does help I think. Don't measure this by the time it's taking, as that will do your head in and you'll just feel worse if you feel you're letting yourself down in that way. Just make room for the feelings of loss and grief, accept that you're having them, and try and focus on whatever else is going on. The unknown can be a scary place, which is why it's natural for us to try and hold on to what we know. But you have to have faith in what's to come, and that you will find love again and that it will be better than before. It will happen! In the meantime don't try and force it, just focus on yourself and your own healing. Keep busy, try new things, go out, talk to your friends and write on here. Good luck.
crashvector Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Yes....yes it is. I know EXACTLY what you are feeling. *tear*
LostOne1 Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 It's hard to let go, because your so used to something and it made you so happy. Now you don't have it and the happiness you got from it no longer exists. And you long for it hoping it will come back. That's why I think time helps us heal.. because over time we just get programmed again to re-learn that happiness we had is gone and we find something else with time that makes us happy again. Letting go I think happens on it's own. When you do other things in life and one day just realize the feelings you had just aren't there now. The pain is gone and it's more like a really old memory that you can barely remember. Hang in there and be strong! Tell yourself that anytime you break down... that you are STRONG and you can do this! 1
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