ThaWholigan Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 I'm not gonna lie - I do yell, but I have a naturally loud voice so even when I'm not yelling people think I'm yelling which is annoying. I am also just as quick to calm down as I am to lose my temper
Author vtgirl Posted January 3, 2013 Author Posted January 3, 2013 He absolutely thinks she's crazy. I mean they dated for like 2 months when he was 16. She has tried to ruin every relationship he's in. She would kill me to get him back if it was legal. She is friends with my bf's mom. They talk all the time. My bf's family does not like her. All she is, is a troublemaker. She is the type of girl that probably drives by our house 20 times a day acting like a stalker. She admitted to my bf's mom the other day she called him on Sun because she was lonely. My bf told me in an arguement the other day that she called him a few months ago reaming him out bc he is with me, and he still talks to her! My bf isn't the type to continue to talk to someone if they yell at him, but he does with her. The situation does not make sense. HE WILL NEVER GO BACK TO HER. I would bet my life on it, that hasn't crossed my mind. His family tells me all the time she has only caused stress in his life. And why would he walk to talk to her when she hates me? I've done nothing to her. Met her once for 5 seconds.
Radu Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Screw the yelling. The yelling is not important. Let's look at what you wrote : He's angry because he has an ex that he dated when he was 16. She has been trying to RUIN every relationship he has because she is literally psycho and wants him back. She's been doing this for the past 20+ years. He will never go back to her, that's a guarantee. She's smashed his truck, she's yelled at him bc he's with me. She calls him when she's lonely, texts him a few times a month. He will call her back when she leaves a voice mail. I'm not a jealous person, but why would he want to talk to her when all she does is cause drama. This is not normal, why are you putting up with it ? Do you realise that if he truly deeply [his life depening on it] wanted her out, she would be out ? Why didn't he involve the law, why didn't he report her to the authorities for harassment ? The other night I just asked him about her, and said that I was uncomfortable with the situation. I said even though you only talk a few times a month, there's no need for it. She hates me even though she's never met me, and how good of a friend can she really be to him? I did NOT give him an ultimatum or say that he couldn't talk to her. He took me telling him that I am uncomfortable that I'm accusing him of being unloyal. Not true. Now he's beyond pissed at me and is thinking of ending the relationship. He said I need to stop acting like I'm 5. I asked him how I would feel if an ex was calling me and texting me when they were lonely, who absolutely wanted me back and I was calling them back. He said he wouldn't care which I find it hard to believe. I would be fine with them talking if she strictly thought of him as a friend, but it will never happen. If it was legal, she would put a bullet in my head to be with him. Leave, why do you allow this crazy woman and this spineless/attention-whore of a man to run your life ? He absolutely thinks she's crazy. I mean they dated for like 2 months when he was 16. She has tried to ruin every relationship he's in. She would kill me to get him back if it was legal. She is friends with my bf's mom. They talk all the time. My bf's family does not like her. All she is, is a troublemaker. She is the type of girl that probably drives by our house 20 times a day acting like a stalker.Excuse me ? So even his own mother prefers her ? NOOOO, get the hell out now girl. Parents can ruin relationships of their kids easily. You want a future MIL on your side or at least respecting you if not liking you. And if she won't do the above, you better have that guy backing you up 100%. She admitted to my bf's mom the other day she called him on Sun because she was lonely. My bf told me in an arguement the other day that she called him a few months ago reaming him out bc he is with me, and he still talks to her! My bf isn't the type to continue to talk to someone if they yell at him, but he does with her. The situation does not make sense. HE WILL NEVER GO BACK TO HER. I would bet my life on it, that hasn't crossed my mind. His family tells me all the time she has only caused stress in his life. And why would he walk to talk to her when she hates me? I've done nothing to her. Met her once for 5 seconds. If his family or him wanted her out of their lives, they would have done so. Do not look at their words, look at their actions. Why is she still in contact with him and his family ? I honestly don't know ... there are a good number of explanations, but what i do know is that his mother is against you, he won't stand up to his mom or this psycho, so you two have NO FUTURE. How long have you two been together and how old are you ?
veggirl Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Vtgirl, LOOK at what you are saying! Your bf allows his ex from his teen years to basically run his life! He is pathetic and he is getting SOMETHING out of this otherwise he wouldn't allow it. Is he a grown man or not? If she is stalking him, he should get a restraining order. Why hasn't he? Why does HE allow her in his life? My bf isn't the type to continue to talk to someone if they yell at him, but he does with her. WHY? do you ask him why??? what is his answer? your boyfriend is a spineless bitch or he is still interested in this ex. and his yelling is, again, just a defense mechanism so he doesn't have to admit he is wrong 1
Author vtgirl Posted January 3, 2013 Author Posted January 3, 2013 I know they only talk a few times a month, it's random. I know for a fact he's not fu**ing her. It's very strange. Long story short my bf's mom is sick and this ex has been there for her, etc. Everyone in his family knows she's trouble. I asked my bf the other night how he would feel if I had an ex calling/texting me and I was calling them back who I knew absolutely wanted me back, how he would feel. He said he didn't know. It would be one thing if they were just strictly friends, but she wants him. I know he will never go back with her. He is a grown man. We were out driving around on Sun, she called left a voicemail, and he told me she found another guy. He's been mad at me the past few days bc I said I was uncomfortable with the situation. He said they only talk about once a month. But she sent him a message on Thanksgiving saying how she wishes she was with him. This girl will never stop. He asked me this morning if I was over my jealous fit. I said yes, because there's nothing I can say. I did not give him an ultimatum or tell him he couldn't talk to her. I don't bring her up a lot, maybe once, and he just gets mad.
Author vtgirl Posted January 3, 2013 Author Posted January 3, 2013 Vtgirl, LOOK at what you are saying! Your bf allows his ex from his teen years to basically run his life! He is pathetic and he is getting SOMETHING out of this otherwise he wouldn't allow it. Is he a grown man or not? If she is stalking him, he should get a restraining order. Why hasn't he? Why does HE allow her in his life? WHY? do you ask him why??? what is his answer? your boyfriend is a spineless bitch or he is still interested in this ex. and his yelling is, again, just a defense mechanism so he doesn't have to admit he is wrong I know for a fact he is not interested in her, and like I said I don't get it, she has called up yelling at him for being with me, and he said he defended me. But why would he still want to talk to her? He won't admit it, but somehow I think he would be upset if I had a guy calling me who wanted me back.
Radu Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 Off-course he would be upset. Look at what you wrote of this guy so far. Why do you go out with him ? How long has this relationship been going ? How old are you ?
Author vtgirl Posted January 3, 2013 Author Posted January 3, 2013 I've been with him for a year, I'm in my mid 20's. He's in his mid 30's.
Radu Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 (edited) Believe it or not, i'm glad to hear what your age is. Because i know you have time to start over again. The yelling is bad, but you have bigger problems in your relationship. Please read this thread again, look at how many users [male and female], mentioned how it sounds unhealthy. Your bf's mother is a major problem, his ex-gf is an even bigger problem. Has he ever tried to get a restraining order against her ? How did he deal with the fact that she wrecked his car ? It's normal for kids to be kicked out of the nest. It's even more normal for kids to start disagreeing with their parents when their personality develops. He does not yell at his mother; did he ever put his mother in her place in regards to his ex-gf and what she is doing to your relationship ? He yells at you. Does he yell at his ex ? Edited January 3, 2013 by Radu
Author vtgirl Posted January 3, 2013 Author Posted January 3, 2013 Believe it or not, i'm glad to hear what your age is. Because i know you have time to start over again. The yelling is bad, but you have bigger problems in your relationship. Please read this thread again, look at how many users [male and female], mentioned how it sounds unhealthy. Your bf's mother is a major problem, his ex-gf is an even bigger problem. Has he ever tried to get a restraining order against her ? How did he deal with the fact that she wrecked his car ? They were like 17 yrs old when she wrecked his car. He then started dating someone else. I'm not sure about every detail when they were together. He's never gotten a restraining order against her. He said they've been friends forever. My bf's last relationship before me, had problems with this girl but his ex never brought it up. I did. It's normal for kids to be kicked out of the nest. It's even more normal for kids to start disagreeing with their parents when their personality develops. He does not yell at his mother; did he ever put his mother in her place in regards to his ex-gf and what she is doing to your relationship ? He yells at you. Does he yell at his ex ? My bf would never abuse me physically, but he has no problem putting his mother in her place. He called her up and yelled at her a few days ago when he found out she was telling me about his ex.
veggirl Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 I know for a fact he is not interested in her, and like I said I don't get it, she has called up yelling at him for being with me, and he said he defended me. But why would he still want to talk to her? He won't admit it, but somehow I think he would be upset if I had a guy calling me who wanted me back. Could you please answer the other questions in my post? Here they are for reference: Vtgirl, LOOK at what you are saying! Your bf allows his ex from his teen years to basically run his life! He is pathetic and he is getting SOMETHING out of this otherwise he wouldn't allow it. Is he a grown man or not? If she is stalking him, he should get a restraining order. Why hasn't he? Why does HE allow her in his life? [you said: My bf isn't the type to continue to talk to someone if they yell at him, but he does with her. ] WHY? do you ask him why??? what is his answer? your boyfriend is a spineless bitch or he is still interested in this ex. and his yelling is, again, just a defense mechanism so he doesn't have to admit he is wrong
veggirl Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 My bf would never abuse me physically, but he has no problem putting his mother in her place. He called her up and yelled at her a few days ago when he found out she was telling me about his ex. yeah probably because he's afraid his mom is gonna slip some of his secrets or something.
Author vtgirl Posted January 3, 2013 Author Posted January 3, 2013 I'm not sure. He doesn't say why he talks to her, just that he's been friends with her for 15+ years. Maybe he talks to her still because he knows she wants him, and he will never go back with her??
Recommended Posts