MoonSiren Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 Yesterday my bf of a month broke up with me saying he just wants to be single. I felt indifferent because I didn't see a future with him anyways. He lives with his parents and plays World of Warcraft all the time. What upset me was I went on OkCupid immediately after and his status is single on there and it appears he is looking for other girls to date. He said that I was special and he loved me on Christmas so I don't really know what happened. Our relationship was mostly physicial with most time spent making out or getting off on each other. He was all about me pleasing him and didn't really show an interest in me in that respect. I invited him over my apartment to watch movies and he brought this huge box of condoms with him. We never had sex as we are virgins wanting to wait until marriage but I gave him his first blow job and a hand job. I feel used, unloveable, manipulated, undisirable, and cheap. I can't stop crying about it! Help?
mammasita Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 This is a good thing that you aren't attached to him. He did you a HUGE favor and a month is not a very long time, especially for him to be saying that he loves you. --You didn't see a future with him --He didn't care about pleasing you - he was selfish --He's confused - if he TRULY loved you on Christmas, this wouldn't have happened My advice is to get yourself together, do something nice for YOU, go out with some friends...... Be pampered (since he obviusly didn't do anything to pamper you) Go get your nails done, buy some sexy underwear, get a haircut. I understand the feelings you are having - because its easy to get down on ourselves after a break up....BUT realize it's only temporary. 1
geegirl Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 People say things even when they don't mean it. His words said he loved you but his actions made you feel like it was all about sex. Red flag. This is a lesson learned. If you want a relationship, make sure you set clear boundaries for yourself in that what you will and will not accept/tolerate. I understand you feel used, but didn't you feel that way when night after night all he did was bring condoms and never actually take you on dates and get to know you on a more deeper level? Why did you put up with it and go along? While he may have acted like a jerk, you played a part in enabling and allowing that behavior to hurt you in the end. I know you are hurt, but you dodged a bullet. Thank your lucky stars it only lasted a month. You know he was not a right fit for you. Your ego while bruised, will mend and you will be back to yourself very soon.
Own Worst Enemy Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 i feel very sorry for any woman who has to date him. he sounds horrible. when your ego stops hurting, you will see that he is horrible, and that you deserve much better.
Samilia Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 Yesterday my bf of a month broke up with me saying he just wants to be single. I felt indifferent because I didn't see a future with him anyways. He lives with his parents and plays World of Warcraft all the time. What upset me was I went on OkCupid immediately after and his status is single on there and it appears he is looking for other girls to date. He said that I was special and he loved me on Christmas so I don't really know what happened. Our relationship was mostly physicial with most time spent making out or getting off on each other. He was all about me pleasing him and didn't really show an interest in me in that respect. I invited him over my apartment to watch movies and he brought this huge box of condoms with him. We never had sex as we are virgins wanting to wait until marriage but I gave him his first blow job and a hand job. I feel used, unloveable, manipulated, undisirable, and cheap. I can't stop crying about it! Help? Manipulated, maybe. But he didn't get you in bed, so manipulated only to a point. Unlovable, surely not. Glad you said no.
Eddie Edirol Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 What upset me was I went on OkCupid immediately after and his status is single on there and it appears he is looking for other girls to date. He said that I was special and he loved me on Christmas so I don't really know what happened. Youre going to find out in life, people lie to make it easier to get you out of their hair. Most people get dumped on this site, their exes tell them they just want to be alone, but then a week later they are with someone else. So next time you get dumped, expect that the reason will be a lie. If he was sexually frustrated and the reason for the breakup was your virginity, then you might run into this a few times dating horny guys. So if a guy is talking about sex more than you want, take that as a red flag and dump him.
Author MoonSiren Posted January 2, 2013 Author Posted January 2, 2013 So you think he dumped me because I wouldn't put out? I was thinking that myself. I guess my ego is bruised because I know I can do better. I make enough to support myself. This is last time I ever date a guy who lives with his parents.
newmoon Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 i'm sorry to hear you're upsest. sadly, it does sound like he just wanted sex. a month is way to short a time period for someone to be in love - he was probably hoping that'd encourage you to have sex with him. thank your lucky stars you didn't and move forward. he's trolling okcupid for easy women - that is why his status changed so fast. 1
crashvector Posted January 3, 2013 Posted January 3, 2013 I dont know how you can REALLY love someone in less than a month... 1
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