chloe1408 Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 We spoke briefly this morning about exchanging old bits (he wants me to post, he doesn’t want to see me) But its just dawned on me im going out Friday night with a friend to the same place we had our first date Ive only just realised and I so want to talk to him and tell him how much I miss him Please talk me out of this He will only ignore me or just tell me to give it up He is moving on on dating sites already!
na49 Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 I don't really know your story, but did he dump you or did you dump him? Either way he's a clown who doesn't deserve your time. How long have you been NC? Also, how will texting him make you feel better?
Author chloe1408 Posted January 2, 2013 Author Posted January 2, 2013 sorry i should have put my story up! just in a bit of a frenzy and trying so hard not to contact him! he dumped me day after boxing day after we had what i thought was a wonderful xmas together, have pretty much been NC since. he did text me saturday and I text him this morning to discuss practicalities - in reality i just wanted to talk to him.
geegirl Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 So, he's on a dating site and posted he is looking for a lovely lady to spend some romantic times with. That should be enough for you to rope in all your self-respect and walk the other way. Don't try to remind someone of your existence. He's detached and is not going to accept your message with the same loving feelings you have. He's moving on. Let him go. 3
Author chloe1408 Posted January 2, 2013 Author Posted January 2, 2013 i know so hard how he is totally fine when im in pieces ive had this event booked for ages but knowing its the place of our first date has just dawned on me and hit me hard. damn.
na49 Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 sorry i should have put my story up! just in a bit of a frenzy and trying so hard not to contact him! he dumped me day after boxing day after we had what i thought was a wonderful xmas together, have pretty much been NC since. he did text me saturday and I text him this morning to discuss practicalities - in reality i just wanted to talk to him. Ouch. and he's already looking for a rebound? I know you miss him. We all miss our ex's company. They miss us too. Just not like we miss them. So keep it to yourself. Just keep posting here if you need to. If he's already looking for someone new, then let him. He'll be someone else's problem now. Do you really want to talk to him? Nothing he tells you will help you move on. and once the BU is over. It's all about YOU! He's not a part of your life right now, and obviously doesn't feel like he needs you in his life. (if he did, he wouldn't have left you)
Toddbt12y1 Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 And where did texting get you? Got you no where. Now you are in an upset frenzy over this Guy and falling into the same crap. Broke NC already, and look. You'll only feed the dragon, and be miserable. Did it make you feel better? Did it heal you? It won't. Stop talking to him. I don't get it. So many go NC and yet let avenues for their ex or they themselves to get in touch. What for? More hurt. Don't do it. 1
Author chloe1408 Posted January 2, 2013 Author Posted January 2, 2013 It's so hard not talking to him! I don't understand how the dumper can just switch their feelings off. He was so cold with me this morning when this time last week we were together! Guess I'll never understand. I've deleted my Facebook and twitter as I don't want o see him. My status is still in a relationship and there are still pictures of us together. Maybe when I'm stronger il log in and delete. Just not yet
geegirl Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 It's so hard not talking to him! I don't understand how the dumper can just switch their feelings off. He was so cold with me this morning when this time last week we were together! Guess I'll never understand. I've deleted my Facebook and twitter as I don't want o see him. My status is still in a relationship and there are still pictures of us together. Maybe when I'm stronger il log in and delete. Just not yet They don't switch off. It's just that their feelings were not as deep or they may have not been as invested. Most times dumpers are detaching long before the break-up, while still playing the part of "loving" partner. By the time they reach the break-up, they're detached and ready to move on.
Author chloe1408 Posted January 2, 2013 Author Posted January 2, 2013 That makes sense. I just wish he had the guts to be honest with me instead of leading me on. I left my own family Christmas Day to spend it with him and cancelled my NYE plans as I didn't want him alone. When in the back of his mind he weren't really feeling it.
Toddbt12y1 Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 It's so hard not talking to him! I don't understand how the dumper can just switch their feelings off. He was so cold with me this morning when this time last week we were together! Guess I'll never understand. I've deleted my Facebook and twitter as I don't want o see him. My status is still in a relationship and there are still pictures of us together. Maybe when I'm stronger il log in and delete. Just not yet Sweetie...I know. Trust me. I know... but you have to be strong. People are weird...they change in a heartbeat. Mostlikely he planned that out for a while. Look cutiepie....you need to realize you are so much better than all of this. He isn't worth an angels tears...I know how you feel...trust me. He isn't worthy of you hugs*
Author chloe1408 Posted January 2, 2013 Author Posted January 2, 2013 It worries me if he had planned it because I literally couldn't tell. He was so lovely right up until the day he left. Maybe I just missed the signs. Oh well, he will probably forget me soon, especially if he is on a dating site!
Toddbt12y1 Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 It worries me if he had planned it because I literally couldn't tell. He was so lovely right up until the day he left. Maybe I just missed the signs. Oh well, he will probably forget me soon, especially if he is on a dating site! Sweetie you're Soo adorable you deserve a big hug...with that said There is no difference between a wiseman and a fool when in love. Most people in love, usually don't see the signs. I did and ignored them myself LOL. He put on a mask. Ppl do. That. Also, good. Let him forget you. Get rid of him and find your lovely self something better. Big big hug* trust me..
fixing Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 It worries me if he had planned it because I literally couldn't tell. He was so lovely right up until the day he left. Maybe I just missed the signs. Oh well, he will probably forget me soon, especially if he is on a dating site! Dont text him. He isnt worthy of your love no more. I know what your going through, and its tough as hell. DO NOT GIVE HIM the satisfaction and boost his ego by calling him. Love your self instead. And post here instead of calling him.
Author chloe1408 Posted January 2, 2013 Author Posted January 2, 2013 Thank you. I will just never understand! He spent a fortune on Christmas presents fore that I can't even bear to look at! I hope he realises what he has lost one day. Although I guess people like him never do
na49 Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 My opinion is that there really aren't "signs". We aren't psychic. If they don't tell us what's wrong, how do they expect us to fix it? If they tell us everything is great. That they love us. Why should we stop believing them eventually? Why should we feel any different? Unless there is constant fighting or abuse. Nothing feels wrong to us. While there are always problems in any relationship, most of them are dealt with. If one person secretly doesn't want it work, then it's out of our control. It doesn't make it hurt any less though..
fixing Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 Thank you. I will just never understand! He spent a fortune on Christmas presents fore that I can't even bear to look at! I hope he realises what he has lost one day. Although I guess people like him never do He will regret it of course, but not until you are long gone, he'll probably get in touch with you in the future, but at that stage, you will be well over him! But seriously, you got to stick to NO CONTACT. It really does help you, its tough, but everytime you text/call him, you are bringing yourself, right back to the forefront of this horrible pain.
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