badgirlfriend Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 I am a freshman in college and have recently met and started dating this boy..he is seriously the best boyfriend I have ever had. He is super sweet and supportive..I feel very safe and happy with him. My friends and family think hes great..basically I’m just trying to say he is a wonderful guy and I honestly love him. I am pushing him away, and I have been for a while now. It has obviously always been a problem but now it is getting to the point where my boyfriend needs me to change my behavior or he cannot be with me anymore. I have never been in such an “adult” relationship..and I honestly would love to be with him for a long time. I know that he would also like to be with me for a long time but he just can’t because I have pushed him away too much. How I push him away is I get really angry and irrational with him for no reason. I will twist his words around so I can be angry and I hate it. I will try to make it seem like he is saying things about other girls or other things that make me insecure. I yell at him and I just cant do it anymore. I am terrified of having to get over him and I really want to make a change so we can be happy together. I’m not sure what to do because when I am being crazy and mad for no reason I know in the back of my head that I am being ridiculous. I know that he loves me but I feel like during my angry outbursts I think he doesnt love me or want me. Ultimately I believe that this issue is a result of me being insecure and also I have anxiety and depression so I think that is a big part of it. I’ve identified my issue and possible causes so I dont really know what advice someone can give me but I would really appreciate anything at all from reassurance to just relating to my problem..
sharsh Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 Are you seeing a psychiatrist? Are you on any medication? I'm not trying to jump to any conclusions, but maybe you need to at least talk with a psychologist about this.
JemJ Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 get some help in any way you see best, therapy of some sort. I did the same with my ex who adored me and I drove him into the arms of another girl with all my crazy antics! If you have a good guy dont let that be you. Read books on the subject of low self esteem and really try to figure out why you are like this and work on resolving it. Maybe see him less or for shorter periods of time until you resolve your issues and explain to him if you need to. he will understand. Just dont let your hangups ruin a good relationship xx
Author badgirlfriend Posted January 2, 2013 Author Posted January 2, 2013 Are you seeing a psychiatrist? Are you on any medication? I'm not trying to jump to any conclusions, but maybe you need to at least talk with a psychologist about this. I was before I went off to school..I told my boyfriend I will go back on my meds because i am willing to try anything...i just didn't like to take them before because i felt they made me emotionless and plus they made me sick
sharsh Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 I was before I went off to school..I told my boyfriend I will go back on my meds because i am willing to try anything...i just didn't like to take them before because i felt they made me emotionless and plus they made me sick Were you communicating this with your Doctor? The first meds I was ever put on made me feel like a zombie, I couldn't stay awake, and I was so hungry ALL THE TIME. I told my Dr, and she switched my script. You may not get it right with the first few prescriptions, everyone reacts differently, what works for some may not work for others. Also, you should never just quit any drug that's prescribed for mental illnesses without consulting your doctor first. Get back to your doctor as soon as you can, see a psychologist as well, and make sure to communicate with your doctor about the side affects you have, so they can make adjustments/switch meds, etc.
JemJ Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 pharma drugs aren't the answer I believe (I grew up with a parent on them for years). Patrick Holford does some great natural supplements called Mood Food, they really helped me. I'd get his book the feel good factor too. He and many other experts believe you can cure depression naturally through diet and vitamins/am ino acids. Excersise helps too as does therapy and seeing your friends and doing nice things. I was recently diagnosed with Adrenal Fatigue which gives symptons of depression so I'd recommend seeing a nutritionist as well as a doctor and doctors are not aware of conditions like this so sometimes mis-diagnose.
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