SlyMan320 Posted January 1, 2013 Posted January 1, 2013 Hey guys, i was successfully able to go NC for 8 months and things are going great for me. I was curious if you guys had any tips on ultimately shutting down the part of your brain that makes you think about your ex-significant other. Any tips that you can offer will be greatly appreciated!
KatZee Posted January 1, 2013 Posted January 1, 2013 Hey guys, i was successfully able to go NC for 8 months and things are going great for me. I was curious if you guys had any tips on ultimately shutting down the part of your brain that makes you think about your ex-significant other. Any tips that you can offer will be greatly appreciated! Get out there. That's really the only thing I've found that works. A couple weeks out from my breakup and I forced myself to get out of my house. I forced myself to reconnect with old friends and go to new places. I remember like it was just yesterday, when I was in my car driving to this Latin club/lounge and the only thing I wanted was to be with my ex back in our old routine. Now I'm almost 8 months post split, and I've made all new friends. I've done things I never would have done with my ex. I'm having a BLAST and I notice that the more I'm out doing things, the more I experience... the less I think of my ex at all. Even at midnight last night, I was at a rave. My ex didn't even cross my mind even as everyone was kissing, I never would have thought I'd go days without thinking of him at all.
TaraMaiden Posted January 1, 2013 Posted January 1, 2013 One piece of advice i found was to get a manual, hand-held counting clicker. Every time your mind is occupied with them, click the clicker. Look at the total at the end of the day. Then be amazed at how much 'me time' you've wasted. Let thoughts of her be a trigger to focus on thinking of, or doing something nice. Convert thinking of her, to planning something for yourself. Find a distraction - and over time, the 'clicks' will reduce in number.... 1
MyAngel Posted January 1, 2013 Posted January 1, 2013 I'll be watching this with interest. She is always on my mind, even when I am not thinking of her if that makes sense. I guess having her in my life everyday has made her part of me but I need to stop. Especially as I doubt she would be thinking of me like I am doing
Author SlyMan320 Posted January 2, 2013 Author Posted January 2, 2013 Thanks everyone for the feedback. It's those beginning months that suck the most. But i think pushing beyond that is what matters. What I hate is all of those memories can't be transformed into something you end up cherishing. I just wanna be at that point in my life that thinking of my ex triggers that thought, "Oh, hope shes happy doing whatever it is that she's doing" instead of "why won't you get out of my head!" I guess it pays to have a crappy memory sometimes :/
JemJ Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 I know how you feel I'm at the 4 month mark of NC with my ex and now also starting it again with my FWB lol! (see my new post) TBH the memories never go (broke up 4 years ago with ex) but the feelings get less intense and and regular as time goes on. You just have to trust in the universe that all of these lessons are just leading you to the right person when you will be better equipped to deal with a relationship. Also throw or hide anything than remind you of them and no cyber stalking!! 1
livelife Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 when you went NC, did you hear from him in those 8 months at all?
bonespockirk Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 well what did it for me was doing no contact for 3 months til he decided to waltz back into my life, realized i had a new boyfriend, and then decided to tell me very hateful and hurtful things even though he is the one that left. when i heard all those things come out of his stupid mouth, i realized that i no longer love or give a **** about him either anymore. lost all respect for him as a person. he didn't have to say those kinds of things to me to try to hurt me. he tried to blame me for the fact that he never loved me. its like telling a guy he has a small dick after breaking up with him . really made me not care about him anymore because my biggest problem was having a huge and open welcoming heart to him no matter what, even after he left me i though good things about him and missed him til i realized what he truly thinks of me when he is alone.
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