thunxtlmnt02 Posted January 1, 2013 Posted January 1, 2013 hey there, i'm new to this but decided to try it to see if it can help me heal in some way. I had been married for 6 years, when this past July my husband told me he wanted to separate. I tried convincing him that we could work it out and I didn't want to be without him. Nothing that I, told him changed his mind. We separated. I continued texting him saying that I loved gum and missed him. I would call for a while too. He told me,I was bugging him and that we were through. Either way, after awhile I did start to bury this empty feeling I had. So much happened between our separation. two days ago he told me he still loves me and cares about me. My car broke down and I asked him for a, ride somewhere. He grabbed my hand kissed me, we shared a moment. Now keep in mind that when we first separated I did all I could to get him back. I'm thinking what if he's begun to realize what he's lost? What if he finally misses me? I still love him through everything and I know I world give him another chance. Should I put myself out there and risk telling him how I feel? I have lost my best friend and partner in the world. Or should I act tough until he breaks through his walls and wait until he looks for me first? Thanks for any feedback, Esmeralda.
2sunny Posted January 1, 2013 Posted January 1, 2013 You need to fix what was broken in the M to begin with that CAUSED the separation FIRST - before you two consider whether or not it can work long term. Seek counseling.
tojaz Posted January 1, 2013 Posted January 1, 2013 hey there, i'm new to this but decided to try it to see if it can help me heal in some way. I had been married for 6 years, when this past July my husband told me he wanted to separate. I tried convincing him that we could work it out and I didn't want to be without him. Nothing that I, told him changed his mind. We separated. I continued texting him saying that I loved gum and missed him. I would call for a while too. He told me,I was bugging him and that we were through. Either way, after awhile I did start to bury this empty feeling I had. So much happened between our separation. two days ago he told me he still loves me and cares about me. My car broke down and I asked him for a, ride somewhere. He grabbed my hand kissed me, we shared a moment. Now keep in mind that when we first separated I did all I could to get him back. I'm thinking what if he's begun to realize what he's lost? What if he finally misses me? I still love him through everything and I know I world give him another chance. Should I put myself out there and risk telling him how I feel? I have lost my best friend and partner in the world. Or should I act tough until he breaks through his walls and wait until he looks for me first? Thanks for any feedback, Esmeralda. Short answer, slow play it. Be receptive, show cautious interest, but don't let the renewed interest send you running back to him so easily. Like Sunny said, there are a lot of things that will need to be repaired and it all starts with a slow path to regaining strong communication in order to work those things out. TOJAZ
breakingguitars Posted January 2, 2013 Posted January 2, 2013 Similar situation here. I told her and convinced her divorce was the best idea. We've been drifting apart for months and I neglected her. She was a little weird sometimes...angry, bitter, argumentative before I told her divorce was the best option. She is still the same way and I realized that it is just the way she is. Everybody is crazy and as dumb as this sounds, I finally understand HER. I want us to try again but she wants to bury our relationship. But she doesn't know when we should file. So it's weird right now. We're getting along and things are changing but I think she wants to see if I'm really serious about us and I won't do this again. So here's the most hopeful thing I understand: While we were split up, I had time to think. I wasn't arguing with her and just focusing on me...Just as she was. Things can really get better. Time alone can be a good thing.
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