kcm Posted August 17, 2004 Posted August 17, 2004 Help I recently met this guy and since then have been very interested in getting to know him better but my problem is I don't know how to approach him about going out, (for coffee to start) I don't even know if he has a girlfriend, here is a brief history on how we met. He comes into the store that I work at and buys his lunch almost everyday but recently he has started to talk to me you know like saying hello and asking me how my day is going and so forth, anyway I found out that he works in the real estate office next to my store so I went in there using the excuse that I was thinking about selling my house and buying a new one, well he recognized me from the store and asked me if I was working that day and made a comment on how he just saw me the day before, so I know he has noticed me now how do I find out if he is interested in me and if he would like to go out and how do I approach him about going out. I must say that I am recently separated and in my mid thirthies if that makes any difference. thanks in advance KCM
overseas2004 Posted August 17, 2004 Posted August 17, 2004 Sorry for putting my two cents in but I would never ask a man out. I would make him ask me out.
morrigan Posted August 17, 2004 Posted August 17, 2004 Try to run into him as you're leaving work ( or as he is leaving his job) and ask if he'd like to go get some coffee with you. At the worst he will say he can't, then smile like it is no big deal and say that it's fine. Men are just as nervous as women about asking people out for dates. If he seems like a nice guy, why not take the chance? As with anyone else, most people are usually flattered when someone they find attractive asks them out. Good luck!
faux Posted August 17, 2004 Posted August 17, 2004 Originally posted by overseas2004 Sorry for putting my two cents in but I would never ask a man out. I would make him ask me out. This is why, at times, I almost get the uncontrollable urge to say, "And women wonder why we think they are nuts!" It is ridiculous to expect a man to ask a woman out. There have been many times where a man had been interested in a woman, but he wanted a woman who could prove herself to be proactive and ask him out. The woman, being quite stubborn and sticking to the old way of approaching things, never made her move despite the fact that she was intensely attracted to this man. If a person is interested in another person, then that person should ask the other person out. I do not care what sex the people are, as I do not believe it should matter in the initial approach. As for the main topic of this thread: You will not have the answers to any of your questions unless you ask this man. You are interested in him. You want to get to know him better, and go out on at least one date with him. Go ask him out on a date, and be sure to mention that you want it to be a "date". See what happens, as there is really no other better way to go about things. Also, dropping hints most always does not work. You, yourself, are uncertain as to whether or not this man is dropping hints to you. I'm quite positive that, were you to attempt to provide him with "hints", he would be just as confused.
surfergirl Posted August 17, 2004 Posted August 17, 2004 Get him to talk about his "down" time away from work. What he does for fun and who he hangs with. He's sure to mention a gf or wife or "significant other". If he doesn't mention anyone else- then you'll have an idea about what to do on your date. Go for it!! You'll never know unless you try and if he turns it down then it's his loss not yours. Good luck!
Amberaine Posted August 22, 2004 Posted August 22, 2004 Honey, I just went thru something so similiar. Just yesterday I finally got the nerve to ask this guy I have been casually talking to out on a date. Mind you I have never asked a guy out before and I probably would have said it was something I would never do until now! I basically said can I ask you a question, Would you be up to going out on a date with me sometime? It took a lot of nerve to ask and I almost chickened out but he said SURE, I didnt know where to go with it next so I said REALLY? He laughed and said yeah! I said okay when and it went from there. Our date is this week and let me say I was ready for any answer but when I got a yes, it really made me feel like even if the date goes no where, I have made a huge step for myself in assertiveness and confindence. Go get him! Good Luck
mac007 Posted August 23, 2004 Posted August 23, 2004 Is he availble? Speaking of realtors, mine is very attractive. As I talk to her, she is amazing. Do I want to ask her out. Yes, but there is a line, that somehow cannot be crossed. Business is business and dating is dating. Keep them seperate. MAC
manofmystrey Posted August 23, 2004 Posted August 23, 2004 Just ask the guy out!!!!! Men like woman also liked to be approached. Hey there is no harm in asking him out. We are no longer in high school. So lets just do what we think is right. maybe he is wating for you to show interest in him. Just go up to him and say hey if you are not doing anything after work or on a day off would like to get a cup of java?
cjcjcj Posted August 26, 2004 Posted August 26, 2004 I would first look to see if he's wearing a wedding ring. Although not all married men wear wedding rings so that could be misleading. I would find common ground and start from there. Find out if you share anything in common with him. Then you could use this as a way to build conversation. Then try to ask him out for coffee. It's difficult to ask someone you like for a date because we're afriad of rejection. It's worth a try.....what's the worst that could happen? He might say yes!
Recommended Posts