Nightsky Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Here is my advice to being friends with girls. Firstly understand that being a friend with a girl is not the same thing as being friends with another guy. Secondly never befriend a girl you want date as some lame attempt to date her and avoid rejection and just slip your way into a relationship. Finally and most importantly never allow your gf/wife to be "friends" with guys with out the boundaries common sense would require example don't go on "dates" with your guy friend you know spend time alone with him. Heck they shouldn't even be getting to friendly with txts, internet communications, or anything else. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
TheZebra Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Finally and most importantly never allow your gf/wife to be "friends" with guys with out the boundaries common sense would require example don't go on "dates" with your guy friend you know spend time alone with him. Heck they shouldn't even be getting to friendly with txts, internet communications, or anything else. Don't 'allow'? I didn't realize that women were still property. Look, I can understand getting suspicious if you see your gf flirting too much with a guy; any guy in person or via texts or whatever. But not letting them go out w/guys w/o boundaries? Really? It takes two to tango, and you should trust your gf enough to know she won't do anything regardless of how the other guy feels. I think this borders on being possessive. I have a guy friend that I used to work with and we get along pretty well, but we're strictly platonic. We like to go out for dinner/drinks every 2 months or so to catch up. I'm not going to stop doing this if I get into a relationship just because it's alone time with a guy. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nightsky Posted December 31, 2012 Author Share Posted December 31, 2012 Don't 'allow'? I didn't realize that women were still property. Oh baby I love it when you talk dirty. If you were my property I'd be looking for full reproductive rights! Look' date=' I can understand getting suspicious if you see your gf flirting too much with a guy; any guy in person or via texts or whatever. But not letting them go out w/guys w/o boundaries? Really? It takes two to tango, and you should trust your gf enough to know she won't do anything regardless of how the other guy feels. I think this borders on being possessive. [/quote'] Oh I'm very possessive. Also I'd like to make clear that the rules I'm putting forth apply to both genders but I was focusing on a mans point of view because, well I am a man. Just take my word on that one. You see I'd just be adding pointless drama to my relationship if I said to my gf "hey I'm going to my good {friend} Ciny's house to watch a movie and play video games" I mean completely different than "I'm going to Jon's house." Same goes for a girl I'm dating, I don't care if there's zero potential of cheating I don't want a gf who is going to a concert with her friend Matt etc. It is a boundaries issue for me and I'm recommending the young men here follow my advice and set these boundaries and understand that opposite sex friends are opposite sex friends. I have a guy friend that I used to work with and we get along pretty well' date=' but we're strictly platonic. We like to go out for dinner/drinks every 2 months or so to catch up. I'm not going to stop doing this if I get into a relationship just because it's alone time with a guy. [/quote'] Well honey what I can say is I think its perfectly fine and understandable what you're doing because you're single. If I was dating you and things got serious I'd want this kind of business to stop or I would dump you. Might not seem so hypothetical at that point. It would also be pretty strange of you to be so intent on going for dinner/drinks with this guy you used to work with if you dating a guy. I understand you have no boundaries with opposite sex friends but you should especially when dating. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
WolfShadow Posted January 1, 2013 Share Posted January 1, 2013 Personally I prefer the company of women. Not girls. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Nightsky Posted January 2, 2013 Author Share Posted January 2, 2013 Personally I prefer the company of women. Not girls. Learn how to talk in the vernacular of our day. Link to post Share on other sites
aussietigerwolf Posted January 23, 2013 Share Posted January 23, 2013 hmm... actually I wouldn't be going out to dinner or concerts with a guy friend if I was in a committed relationship but... if any guy suggested he owned me then I'd be dumping him. Link to post Share on other sites
aussietigerwolf Posted January 23, 2013 Share Posted January 23, 2013 Who said anything about owning you? you didn't but I was speaking in general Link to post Share on other sites
aussietigerwolf Posted January 23, 2013 Share Posted January 23, 2013 real cute. aye, I'm adorable Link to post Share on other sites
TreyPlaisance Posted January 23, 2013 Share Posted January 23, 2013 I realized at age six that girls make better friends than boys. My male peers amused themselves by competing to see who could smack a higher spot on the wall in the hallway outside our first grade classroom, a pursuit that seemed to me not only entirely pointless but also like an unnecessary waste of energy. This sort of judgment serves as a pretty neat summary of my observations about most male behavior for the following decade. (Most boys want a car for their sixteenth birthday; I wanted The Oxford Dictionary of Modern Quotations and The Portable Dorothy Parker. The chasm, in all that time, had not been bridged much at all.) As a result, I grew up with girls as my best friends. To me they seemed much more logical and understandable creatures, despite the initial shock I had about how they changed as we got older. In middle school I formed a sort of trio with two girls, and during the awkward first few months of high school I became best friends with a girl who sat near me in third period. Though I know from my sister’s experiences that friendships between girls are as completely inscrutable to me as the wall smacking competition, my friendships with these girls were beautifully simple. I think the prime factor was a lack of competition, which seemed to me the hallmark of male camaraderie, a notion that I had always been uncomfortable with and somewhat offended by. And despite what cultural notions we’ve inherited, I am convinced that the teenage male is just as insecure as his female counterpart, and that, combined with competitive nature, makes it nearly impossible to form a quality friendship with him. A best friend essentially plays two roles: advice giver (or, alternately, advice receiver) and companion. In my experience, girls have been frank and reliable advice givers, and the activities they pursue are comparatively less dangerous and more interesting. The choice seemed simple. Link to post Share on other sites
Treble Clef Posted January 23, 2013 Share Posted January 23, 2013 Here is my advice to being friends with girls. Firstly understand that being a friend with a girl is not the same thing as being friends with another guy. True. Secondly never befriend a girl you want date as some lame attempt to date her and avoid rejection and just slip your way into a relationship. True, that's an incredibly dumb thing to do. Finally and most importantly never allow your gf/wife to be "friends" with guys with out the boundaries common sense would require example don't go on "dates" with your guy friend you know spend time alone with him. Heck they shouldn't even be getting to friendly with txts, internet communications, or anything else. Hm, I disagree. Are you suggesting that once someone gets in a relationship they cut off all friendships with their opposite-gender friends? I don't always like my boyfriend hanging out with his female friends, but then he's known them years before we dated, so it's kind of unfair to ask him to pick them or me. I agree that there should be a boundary drawn so that no one's tempted to cheat, but saying that they should cut off all text/IM/internet communications is a bit much to ask. Besides, if there's mutual love and trust then this shouldn't be an issue. Link to post Share on other sites
bohica Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 In my opinion it's ok to be friends with a women, even an ex if both know there isn't a future. It just takes time to get over any feeling that may be left. It also takes a little maturity. Having a girl as a close friend has it's advantages.First I think it's important to understanding each persons personal situation.If both parties are single then do what you want when you want to do it.Live life and have fun. However, if one or the other is involved with someone then there are lines to be drawn and respect for the relationship should take place.There should be a little less hanging out and a little less texting.There should be no secrets about the friendship and you should never try to disrespect the other persons partner or your own relationship.If you suspect that your partners (wife/gf/bf...) friend has bad intentions, is out to hurt your relationship or is crossing boundries then something it should be talked about. Link to post Share on other sites
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