snilljente Posted August 17, 2004 Posted August 17, 2004 Why would a man come on super strong, want to be with you 24/7, tell you he's only felt this way once before in his life, ask you to try on a ring so he can see what it looks like on your finger, talk about the future, etc......only to freak out and say that he is in no place to be making a serious commitment and then act as if you have imagined the fact that you were getting serious to begin with....Is this just an act to see if he can catch you in his web, or is it a self-esteem thing....wants to see how many people he can get to like him?.....I don't get this...this is a man who was married before..not a kid.....a grown man....Why lead us on and then act surprised when we start caring...if it's casual dating he was looking for, why all of the ring, future, feelings stuff? I don't get it?!
overseas2004 Posted August 17, 2004 Posted August 17, 2004 No dear he really did like you. But the problem is that he is immature and not ready to make a commitment. He was not really concious of it but he was testing his ability to catch you. Now he really wants to be rid of you because he saw he could have what he wanted. The thrill of the chase it is called and all men do it. Oh and by the way, dont think that you could have caught him by continuing to play hard to get.... That is not what a real relationship is... anyway, and it wouldn't have worked. Ultimately you would have had to let your guard down and he would have run. Men do this all the time. They have been doing it since the beggining of creation. It is not a reflection on you. Just move on he wasn't ready. ITS NOT YOU.
Author snilljente Posted August 17, 2004 Author Posted August 17, 2004 I hear what you are saying, while he was telling me that he just needed space, that he would be back, that he really cared, bla bla bla...he found himself 10 years younger and gave her the ring that he had be try on and was joking with her parents and her about taking her to Vegas so they could elope...I mean if he really cared about me, how is he able to flip a switch and be carrying on this other relationship...and if he isn't ready for a commitment, why lay on all of the ring, wedding bull****..why not just say that he wants to hang out and see where things go...he moves VERY fast, but then freaks out...why would a man who is afraid of commitment move so fast if he himself knows that he is going to freak when the girl starts caring and he realizes that he might care too.....It's a very strange thing to be treated like something so disposable.....he has been married before....???
cat girl Posted August 17, 2004 Posted August 17, 2004 the man you are talking about is a slim, doesn't seem as tho he values marriage, a ring or committment, seems as this is all a big joke to him, if he is going from door to door with the same ring. This is unbelievable and you should run as fast as you can. Be happy you found out of this abnormal behavior now. You are much better off with out him.
reasontosigh Posted August 17, 2004 Posted August 17, 2004 I'm inclined to go with catgarlo on this one. This goes way beyond the usual "thrill of the chase" type stuff.
Author snilljente Posted August 17, 2004 Author Posted August 17, 2004 Yeah, I think you are right about marriage, the ring, not being meaningful to him and it all being a big game....I had asked him why he still had his ex's ring to begin with....guess he needs it..it's one of his props and part of his MO...the scary thing is, he is so smooth and so charming, he has very smart women falling for this because he seems SO sincere....He told me that his ex wife left him after 1 1/2 years of marriage...now I have a feeling that there were two sides to this story and it just wasn't "out of the blue"....I agree that this is more than the "thrill of the chase"...it seems almost pathological to me....a big game, a big web of lies.....wonder why someone does this...opinions? I am just curious what other people think..this has been such an odd experience for me...
Recommended Posts