A suggestion to any man in a womans friendzone.

[Mrlonelyone]

Try making an aggressive physical move on them. Not like...rape or anything...just put your hands on them in places that are thought of as boyfriend territory. The below assumes they are single as in not officially an exclusive item with someone else and in good standing.

 

• Next time they have broken up with someone and are crying on your shoulder....grab them and pull them hips up onto your lap and let them feel your manhood under them.
   
  
• Next time they go to give you a hug, pull them close and tight to you so they can feel your body and get an idea of the man they are denying themselves.
   
  
• You would be surprised how a man can create chemistry in a woman who dose not find him utterly repulsive if he's confident enough to put his hands on her.
  

 

This I know from both perspectives. Having had men be confident enough to put their hands on me (and read my body language which signaled I was open to that at the time).

 

Having placed my hands on women who were supposedly off limits only to end up having sex with them...or at least a daily playmate for some grab @$$ which ain't half bad either.

 

If the woman says no she dosen't feel that way and pulls away. Then she's at least a real friend. Seeing that you are a sexual creature she may even think of girlfriends of her's who might like you. A real female friend will just see you as a man trying to meet his sexual and emotional needs with a good friend and even if she can't help you she may know someone who can.

 

If the woman was just FZ'ing you, and you do the above she will react in horror and never want to see you again. Which really isn't a big loss since such a person is a user. Don't put all women who aren't willing to sleep with you in this category.

 

TL;DR: The difference between being in a womans FZ and being a possible FWB, BF, or SO is being willing to put your hands in places that they don't yet know they are willing to let you put them. Real friends female friends will say no but not hold it against you for trying. Women FZ'ing you will be repulsed by the idea that a lowly creature like you even has sexual needs and think that they could possibly meet them.

[TheZebra]

What about a woman getting out of a guy's friendzone? I heard showing boobs usually works, but I was hoping for something a little more subtle

[Casablanca]

The only way someone gets into the friendzone is if the woman isn't attracted to them in some way

[Mrlonelyone]

The only way someone gets into the friendzone is if the woman isn't attracted to them in some way

 

False. They may get put there because of that, but they dont' stay there because of that. They stay because the woman FZ'ing them sees them as totally castrated. Devoid of all sexual desire and needs.

[Mrlonelyone]

What about a woman getting out of a guy's friendzone? I heard showing boobs usually works, but I was hoping for something a little more subtle

 

You may stick out your tounge but that can work. Men FZ women by not noticing that the woman is interested in them that way. Many a man will not take the chance unless the woman just about wap's them in the face with their T and A. Men who have faced lots of rejection get that way.

[sweetkiwi]

Yeah that's exactly how i ended up in bed with my best friend. He grabbed my face and kissed me. And i liked it. I was always attracted to him. He's a really big goofball but is funny and has a very very pretty penis.

 

The sex is so good we hook up whenever we're both single. And we remain good friends. It doesn't always work out this way though.

[Necromancer]

I tried it once for the fun. Never heard from her again. Not like a much loss as you say.

[Mrlonelyone]

Yeah that's exactly how i ended up in bed with my best friend. He grabbed my face and kissed me. And i liked it. I was always attracted to him. He's a really big goofball but is funny and has a very very pretty penis.

 

The sex is so good we hook up whenever we're both single. And we remain good friends. It doesn't always work out this way though.

 

^^This exactly.

 

Where do these guys think sets them apart from an FWB half of the time? Odds are the women FZin'g them aren't really FZ'ing them in the worst sense of that concept. They just don't think that the man is interested in sex with them at all.

 

If I was a genetic woman. I'd prefer a FWB that I could cry on the shoulder of after a break up and have consolation sex with over a FZ' guy who won't make a move even if I lay my body all over him. In fact it could be kind of insulting to have a man not make a move in those situations.

[ThaWholigan]

This assumes a couple of things: - The man is adequate at being able to read a woman's body language to such a degree that he can attempt the maneuver. - The man has enough confidence, boldness and self-comfort to touch the woman in such a way. It's certainly one way to gain closure. I advocate synthesizing such an approach into ones natural repertoire - but not being overly touchy, or clumsy. One should be at least bold without touching at first and slowly acclimatize to it. One should also not be afraid of simply walking away.

[Mrlonelyone]

I tried it once for the fun. Never heard from her again. Not like a much loss as you say.

 

Exactly. If she was at least a friend she may have slapped you away. But the force of whatever made you friends would have brought her around.

[sweetkiwi]

You never know unless you try boys. I assume all my straight male friends would have sex with me since i am not ugly. And i am alive. My first boyfriend was a family friend. He wanted to be wherever i was. But he had a girlfriend. I told him If he wanted to go to the movies that night he should breakup with her and pick me up.

 

He called 30 minutes later. Single. But not for long. That lasted almost 3 years.

[Mrlonelyone]

This assumes a couple of things: - The man is adequate at being able to read a woman's body language to such a degree that he can attempt the maneuver. - The man has enough confidence, boldness and self-comfort to touch the woman in such a way. It's certainly one way to gain closure. I advocate synthesizing such an approach into ones natural repertoire - but not being overly touchy, or clumsy. One should be at least bold without touching at first and slowly acclimatize to it. One should also not be afraid of simply walking away.

 

Well yeah. I mean if one's totally unable to read body language and social cues this is not going to work. I just think these guys lack confidence and are afraid not only of rejection but being called horrible things for making an unwanted move.

 

I'm not talking about putting a hand on a womans breast or buttocks and saying "honk honk" as you squeeze really hard. I'm talking about putting your arm around a woman. Getting in her intimate space and letting her feel your presence in that space. Letting her know, without words, that you have a sex drive.

 

Especially at that classic time FZ'd men complain about...after a break up or other traumatic event. If the woman is crying on your shoulder already it's not a long way to your lap. If she doesn't object to your lap she probably won't object to your advance.

 

That may sound scummy but then one of the best times to have someone to do that with is when your hurting emotionally.

[ThaWholigan]

Well yeah. I mean if one's totally unable to read body language and social cues this is not going to work. I just think these guys lack confidence and are afraid not only of rejection but being called horrible things for making an unwanted move.

 

I'm not talking about putting a hand on a womans breast or buttocks and saying "honk honk" as you squeeze really hard. I'm talking about putting your arm around a woman. Getting in her intimate space and letting her feel your presence in that space. Letting her know, without words, that you have a sex drive.

 

Especially at that classic time FZ'd men complain about...after a break up or other traumatic event. If the woman is crying on your shoulder already it's not a long way to your lap. If she doesn't object to your lap she probably won't object to your advance.

 

That may sound scummy but then one of the best times to have someone to do that with is when your hurting emotionally.

It does sound a little scummy

 

Either way, you are right - sometimes if a man wants to get anywhere he actually has to be forward. Yes, there are girls who want to take things slow and wait and stuff. This is not the kind of girl I encounter much these days and neither do a lot of guys. There are even a sizable portion who will make certain guys wait, yet will bang another guy because he had the balls to escalate with her, or for another reason (i.e. she thought he was super hot).

 

I learned a long time ago that being slow on the draw will get you shot . So I found a natural rhythm, and now I'm pretty much direct. I still have my problems - but I'm getting there. Touching is the important step. Be physical guys. Not inappropriate, but physical.

[Mrlonelyone]

It does sound a little scummy

 

Either way, you are right - sometimes if a man wants to get anywhere he actually has to be forward. Yes, there are girls who want to take things slow and wait and stuff. This is not the kind of girl I encounter much these days and neither do a lot of guys. There are even a sizable portion who will make certain guys wait, yet will bang another guy because he had the balls to escalate with her, or for another reason (i.e. she thought he was super hot).

 

I learned a long time ago that being slow on the draw will get you shot . So I found a natural rhythm, and now I'm pretty much direct. I still have my problems - but I'm getting there. Touching is the important step. Be physical guys. Not inappropriate, but physical.

 

I learned it from a very young age. The first woman I ever had sex with was an ESL student in jr high school. We played grab @$$ in the hallway for almost two years. Until, one day when the fire alarm was triggered on a cold day I put my arms around her to keep her warm. Then we walked to her nearby house and had sex. All without saying one single solitary word.

 

The first man I had sex with was a boy at the same school who made similar moves on me.

 

Hmm...this really shouldn't be surprising since people did this way way before we evolved speech.

[phineas]

False. They may get put there because of that, but they dont' stay there because of that. They stay because the woman FZ'ing them sees them as totally castrated. Devoid of all sexual desire and needs.

 

But, trying to get sexual with them has never worked for me.

 

What has worked for me is getting in shape & getting with lots of other women.

 

Now, not only do they no longer view me as harmless, the one's who have BF's don't want to be friends with me anymore because their BF's would see me as a threat.

 

To be honest, it's a good feeling.

[ThaWholigan]

I learned it from a very young age. The first woman I ever had sex with was an ESL student in jr high school. We played grab @$$ in the hallway for almost two years. Until, one day when the fire alarm was triggered on a cold day I put my arms around her to keep her warm. Then we walked to her nearby house and had sex. All without saying one single solitary word.

 

The first man I had sex with was a boy at the same school who made similar moves on me.

 

Hmm...this really shouldn't be surprising since people did this way way before we evolved speech.

I didn't learn quite so young. I think there were times where girls could have flopped their titties all over my face and I would have been none the wiser about how to proceed. Like, I knew what I could/should do but I was always a fraidy cat back then.

 

That I reckon is a lot of guys problem. They think in binary form - you're either a nice, passive man, or an assh*le douche bag/jerk. There are a variety of different variables within, in-between and ranging far outside those paradigms. Don't be afraid to do something a little outside that "nice" persona. Try something else. Get some balls and some character. Start learning to read situations and people.

[ThaWholigan]

But, trying to get sexual with them has never worked for me.

 

What has worked for me is getting in shape & getting with lots of other women.

 

Now, not only do they no longer view me as harmless, the one's who have BF's don't want to be friends with me anymore because their BF's would see me as a threat.

 

To be honest, it's a good feeling.

Meh, do both

[Mrlonelyone]

But, trying to get sexual with them has never worked for me.

 

What has worked for me is getting in shape & getting with lots of other women.

 

Now, not only do they no longer view me as harmless, the one's who have BF's don't want to be friends with me anymore because their BF's would see me as a threat.

 

To be honest, it's a good feeling.

 

Well I am a transgender woman who's 5' 10" 40-27-41 - 7* and was never ever all that conventionally masculine in action or appearance. Even when I tried very hard to be. SOooo I don't know how much of a difference being a certain shape really makes a difference. So long as you can look somewhat attractive.

 

Women could easily see me as a sexual non-option but generally they don't.

 

*Yes that measurement is what you think it is. The fact that people buy double headed dildo's and strapons proves there is a certain raw sexual appeal to the notion of a feminine being with a *ick.

[sweetkiwi]

Yeahhhhppp!!!!!! Im a woman who gets extremely turned on by that exact thought. I had the opportunity to be with a trans woman but i didn't know her at all and it wouldve been a threesome with a pretty man.

 

And i think If you were my friend and i felt comfortable i would like to experience you lonelyone :*

[Mrlonelyone]

Yeahhhhppp!!!!!! Im a woman who gets extremely turned on by that exact thought. I had the opportunity to be with a trans woman but i didn't know her at all and it wouldve been a threesome with a pretty man.

 

And i think If you were my friend and i felt comfortable i would like to experience you lonelyone :*

 

Well who knows. If were ever at least on the same continent it's a date.

[sweetkiwi]

Okay honey but i want to be the big spoon after

[Cutiepie1976]

Yeah that's exactly how i ended up in bed with my best friend. He grabbed my face and kissed me. And i liked it. I was always attracted to him. He's a really big goofball but is funny and has a very very pretty penis.

 

The sex is so good we hook up whenever we're both single. And we remain good friends. It doesn't always work out this way though.

 

The critical piece in this is that you were ALREADY attracted to him.

 

Sorry, but when there is clearly zero interest in a guy and he starts grabbing and/or groping you, hugging you too tightly, it's just creepy. Nothing is more repulsive than some guy who does what is proposed in the OP when you've made it clear there's no hope and no interest. Keep the behavior up, and fairly soon you get a reputation for being the creepy, socially awkward, inappropriate guy. That then makes it near impossible to have any dating success with women in your extended social circle.

 

Most guys do just fine by reading body language and asking women who interest them DIRECTLY for a date. If the answer is "no," they repeat the process until they encounter mutual interest. Respect and normal human interaction will get you closer to a GF and a relationship than copping a feel and holding someone tightly in unwanted embraces in some attempt to get her to see you as a "man."

 

From the posts I've seen here on LS, the issue is the guy's refusal to accept that a particular woman has said "no, not interested." Somehow that gets viewed as game-playing, a challenge, playing hard to get, shy etc. and he just has to convince her, win her over, play his own mind games, play his cards "right," or stick around long enough being super-nice, and she'll come to her senses and fall for him. It's a complete waste of time. Pick someone else instead.

 

If there were even a shred of interest on her part, she would do something to get the ball rolling--make an effort to be next to him, flirt, touch him playfully, etc.--if the guy were slow to act. If you're struggling to convince someone to date you, she ain't interested. Find someone else. That's the secret to successful dating. Focus on people who might like you. Don't waste energy on those who clearly don't.

 

You cannot make someone become attracted to you. You cannot make someone like you. You cannot make someone love you. Human nature doesn't work that way. Instead of persisting doggedly against a closed door until you finally give up in complete frustration, find someone who is actually interested. There is always someone available once you lose the pointless fixation on Ms. Unavailable and Romantically Disinterested in You. And if you pay attention, you'll notice that when someone of interest to her comes along, he doesn't need to hug her overly tightly, touch her inappropriately, or any of the other slimy, creepy things being suggested here. Suddenly she is eager to date him and speed the process of getting to know him along. There's a lesson there.

[Mrlonelyone]

Cutiepie.

 

We're not talking about women who've said a clear no not interested.

We're talking about men who have female friends and women who have FZ'd them who they would like to possibly have a more physical relationship with.

 

We're not talking about making someone love you necessarily.

We're talking about showing physical interest in women with whom these guys already have some rapport and basic understanding with. (Real friendship plus some sexual passion is at least two legs of the love stool.)

 

We're not talking about guys who can't take no for an answer.

We're talking about guys who don't do anything for a woman to say no to.

 

I'll bet that many guys who have complained about being FZ'd by women have never even directly asked them on a date, or made a direct move that could be clearly rejected or accepted.

[Cutiepie1976]

But, trying to get sexual with them has never worked for me.

 

What has worked for me is getting in shape & getting with lots of other women.

 

Now, not only do they no longer view me as harmless, the one's who have BF's don't want to be friends with me anymore because their BF's would see me as a threat.

 

To be honest, it's a good feeling.

 

I'm going to guess you have more dates with this approach than the guys trying all sorts of maneuvers to get out of a particular woman's friend zone.

[Cutiepie1976]

Cutiepie.

 

We're not talking about women who've said a clear no not interested.

We're talking about men who have female friends and women who have FZ'd them who they would like to possibly have a more physical relationship with.

 

We're not talking about making someone love you necessarily.

We're talking about showing physical interest in women with whom these guys already have some rapport and basic understanding with. (Real friendship plus some sexual passion is at least two legs of the love stool.)

 

We're not talking about guys who can't take no for an answer.

We're talking about guys who don't do anything for a woman to say no to.

 

I'll bet that many guys who have complained about being FZ'd by women have never even directly asked them on a date, or made a direct move that could be clearly rejected or accepted.

 

The key is to express interest and ask for a date, not grab, grope, and bear hug.

 

As most women will tell you, a guy getting overly physical sooner than she is ready is a surefire way to kill a woman's interest. I recall you telling a poster she was "rash" because she wouldn't consider a second date with a guy who couldn't keep his hands to himself. That's pretty typical. Most guys who date successfully understand that and read a the woman's body language really well. Guys who shoot themselves in the foot, do what is proposed in the OP.