Jasmine36 Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 I am going to make this short, I am heartbroken 5 weeks ago my ex broke up with me of 4 years, to me it came out of the blue the previous day we had a lovely day together then the next he ended things saying that he just didn't love me the way he use too. I did the begging and pleading and lost all dignity 3 weeks on I learn that after a week of our break up he has someone else that in his words is "lovely" and makes him so happy good old Facebook! I don't think I can get any lower I feel so alone and I physically hurt I am just a zombie when I am with other people. Everyday for the past 5 weeks I have either text or called or emailed to which mostly he just ignores, it has been 3 days of NC now and I feel like I am going insane. Please tell me this gets easier I just can't cope anymore and I feel like my friends and family are sick of me talking about it I just hurt and cry so much.
gtov Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 yes the pain will end. you have to remember two things; He did love you and you had a wonderful time with him. The other thing to remember is that he loved you for a reason and those reasons are why someone will love you again. That last one is a bit tricky because it's hard to realize what it was about you but over time and as you get back out there and start to live again it will all come back slowly but surely. You never know whats around the next corner but you have to go out for a walk to get there. focus on you... the most important part of your life is yourself and your happiness. dwelling on your ex is not living but you ARE alive so hang in there! you're worthy!!! 2
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 I'm not sure he loves her at all. One, he is ignoring her, broke up, and admitted to lost feelings. Then he speeds off to another girl. OP. Forget this Guy...yes it gets easier in time. You can help make it easier by going out and living life...doing things. You can even talk on ls for comfort. Do not contact him. Block him. It will be war at first...but get easier. You will find someone better.
Inviv_girl Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 Im doing NC too and its hell of what Im feeling. Imagining his holding someone else now and forget all about me and the loving relationship we once have. You're not alone, I feel the same as you are and I know it is hard!! Just do NC, it is hard really hard but it is for the best and will get easier people said! Not to me though, I still cry everyday for him.. but I know with time it'll get better. Hang in there sweety..hugs!
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 Im doing NC too and its hell of what Im feeling. Imagining his holding someone else now and forget all about me and the loving relationship we once have. You're not alone, I feel the same as you are and I know it is hard!! Just do NC, it is hard really hard but it is for the best and will get easier people said! Not to me though, I still cry everyday for him.. but I know with time it'll get better. Hang in there sweety..hugs! Time heals, it takes a lot sometimes. I noticed you said not me...but it eventually will. I am sure feelings will be there years to come. You both just need constant support
aliceb1987 Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 You WILL recover...very similar situation happened to me earlier this year admittedly underneath i did know it was coming,but was still a massive shock when another person was on the scene very soon after the breakup.I also found this out on facebook. I took comfort in the fact that if someone is capable of publicising something like that so insensitively,fully aware of the affect it will have on you, they do not have shred of compassion or respect for you anymore even if they once loved you,and are not worth being so upset over.Easier said than done i know....it does take time,but no contact is definitely the best way to move on faster.Everyone on here told me that then, and i now see why. You will love and be loved again...sure it will take time to be ready,but it will happen.Take care and hope u feel better soon x x x
Author Jasmine36 Posted December 28, 2012 Author Posted December 28, 2012 Thank you all, sad to say I broke NC on my behalf I am like a crazy woman and started texting again with no reply, I just feel I have so many unanswered questions and it is driving me nuts! Time to reset the NC counter! Fingers crossed I can do it this time, my heart is just in bits
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 Thank you all, sad to say I broke NC on my behalf I am like a crazy woman and started texting again with no reply, I just feel I have so many unanswered questions and it is driving me nuts! Time to reset the NC counter! Fingers crossed I can do it this time, my heart is just in bits You have got to stop that. He probably blocked you and thinks you're nuts. Just stop...its only hurting yourself. We all want answers...but you don't get them and they don't heal anything.
crashvector Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 Thank you all, sad to say I broke NC on my behalf I am like a crazy woman and started texting again with no reply, I just feel I have so many unanswered questions and it is driving me nuts! Time to reset the NC counter! Fingers crossed I can do it this time, my heart is just in bits I know its offers no consolation to either one of us, but I feel your pain. My fiancee called off our wedding and ended our relationship yesterday. I know how bad you want to get just one breadcrumb thrown your way...but know it will only hurt YOU. It's very very very hard when your heart is breaking...I know...but we have to accept the truth....they don't love us anymore. If they still loved us, we wouldnt be here hurting would we? Yes, its a shame...a HUGE shame...to have love like that just go away. The problem is...that for people like us...the ones that were dumped...it doesnt go away so easily. Love likes to fight...it likes to linger...it does not LIKE to go away. But, its gone. You have to work on moving along. Tell you what....I'm BRAND NEW to this being as it happened only 22 hours ago, but Ive been divorced before. I can tell you honestly that its NOT easier after a divorce. It is NOT better to have loved and lost...and that's a sad fact...but its true.
Author Jasmine36 Posted December 28, 2012 Author Posted December 28, 2012 You have got to stop that. He probably blocked you and thinks you're nuts. Just stop...its only hurting yourself. We all want answers...but you don't get them and they don't heal anything. I know 1 min I'm fine then I go in panic mode he defiantly thinks I'm nuts by now! It's like I want to torture myself :(
crashvector Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 I know 1 min I'm fine then I go in panic mode he defiantly thinks I'm nuts by now! It's like I want to torture myself :( Go to the doctor...get 0.25mg xanax. Thank me later.
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 LOL Xanax she doesn't need that really. Just time. Instead of texting or looking at him, come on LS and talk it out. I'd rather you do that.
Author Jasmine36 Posted December 28, 2012 Author Posted December 28, 2012 Go to the doctor...get 0.25mg xanax. Thank me later. Lol I have actually been to the dr and he prescribed anti depressants my problem is I ask myself WHY with nobody to tell me the answers, it is amazing how 1 person can mess you up so bad and not feel anything
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 Lol I have actually been to the dr and he prescribed anti depressants my problem is I ask myself WHY with nobody to tell me the answers, it is amazing how 1 person can mess you up so bad and not feel anything Sweetheart, trust me answers do not really matter. One day you will see that. Do not holdout hope for something like that. If you get it you get it...if not don't care! It is your time for yourself. Go be selfish and live, spend on yourself. Yes one person tends to hurt us badly. You will recover. See yourself as the pretty strong girl you are, be selfish and realize his next relationship won't last and he won't be happy. Just believe it. The WHY doesn't matter no more...only you and you getting better.
Author Jasmine36 Posted December 28, 2012 Author Posted December 28, 2012 Sweetheart, trust me answers do not really matter. One day you will see that. Do not holdout hope for something like that. If you get it you get it...if not don't care! It is your time for yourself. Go be selfish and live, spend on yourself. Yes one person tends to hurt us badly. You will recover. See yourself as the pretty strong girl you are, be selfish and realize his next relationship won't last and he won't be happy. Just believe it. The WHY doesn't matter no more...only you and you getting better. Thank you for your kind words I am feeling calmer now but the problem is I am going through the roller coaster of emotions! I would just love to wake up just once and it not be the first thing I think about! XxX
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 Thank you for your kind words I am feeling calmer now but the problem is I am going through the roller coaster of emotions! I would just love to wake up just once and it not be the first thing I think about! XxX Well that takes time. Even I sometimes think of my ex. You don't just forget years. But it won't hurt you as much or anymore with time. That is what matters. Somedays your ex won't be a thought...somedays yes. But don't give him the pleasure of crying. You need to show him that an attractive girl like you will be just fine alone and one day will find better. Trust me...I do know how you feel /hug
Author Jasmine36 Posted December 28, 2012 Author Posted December 28, 2012 Well that takes time. Even I sometimes think of my ex. You don't just forget years. But it won't hurt you as much or anymore with time. That is what matters. Somedays your ex won't be a thought...somedays yes. But don't give him the pleasure of crying. You need to show him that an attractive girl like you will be just fine alone and one day will find better. Trust me...I do know how you feel /hug Thank you, you lovely person much love <3 I need to use this site more rather than contacting my ex! Xxxxxxxx
Toddbt12y1 Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 Thank you, you lovely person much love <3 I need to use this site more rather than contacting my ex! Xxxxxxxx Anytime, you will find LS very helpful...lots of helpful people...tho some might not be I guess. But yeah don't go contacting your ex...if you feel like that come and talk, joke around, get your mind off him, he wasn't worthy of your grace anyhow.
oracle Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 (edited) You need to stop asking the why questions. I know how u feel trust me. Mine ended after 14years and i have lived with him for 2.5 while liquidating assets. I get to SEE and KNOW everything, and that is FAR FAR FAR worse. Every now and then I get caught up in the WHY questions. Its a black hole for what little energy you have. See it for what it is. And try to accept it as it is. You can't change anything. Lol I have actually been to the dr and he prescribed anti depressants my problem is I ask myself WHY with nobody to tell me the answers, it is amazing how 1 person can mess you up so bad and not feel anything Edited December 29, 2012 by oracle
sedona Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 Thank you all, sad to say I broke NC on my behalf I am like a crazy woman and started texting again with no reply, I just feel I have so many unanswered questions and it is driving me nuts! Time to reset the NC counter! Fingers crossed I can do it this time, my heart is just in bits And don't chastise yourself about breaking NC. You are not crazy; you're hurting. Just start over with NC again. You're doing the very best you can do! 1
na49 Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 STOP messaging him. Block him on everything if you have to. Definitely block him on facebook. Believe me, nothing you see on his facebook will help you feel better. Do you want to see how much he loves his new girl? All of the things you guys used to do, your songs, your hangouts are all being enjoyed by another girl? He "loves" this new girl so much and doesn't miss you at all? Do it for yourself, stop checking up on him. I haven't checked up on my ex in two months and have felt much better since. The idea of her with another guy absolutely kills me, so I'm avoiding her facebook/twitter like the plague. It does get better, but you have to want to get better. Cry as much as you need, but you're only pushing him further away with all of the emails and messages. He WILL miss you. Trust me on that too.
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