No females friends and i have never felt better.

[KungFuJoe]

Spoke on this on somedude's thread--is this friend of yours a girl you're not attracted to? Because that can work. If two people aren't attracted to each other, friends can work. If one of you likes the other and just settled for the friendzone because they believe it's better than nothing, that's not a friendship, but a soft rejection. Those don't work. Since I only talk to women I'm attracted two, I'm faced with two outcomes: either she accepts my advances and we date, or she doesn't and I drop her. No real room for friends, unless after we tried dating we agreed to remain friends if it didn't work out in the end. But that's after we've already dated. I don't friend women who won't give me a chance to date them.

 

All my female friends have always been attractive...in some cases, very much so. It's not that I choose them that way...it just happens. But I think a lot has to do with the fact that, back when I was younger, we used to party a lot...clubs, bars...whatever...and those were the kinds of girls that entered our circle of friends.

 

As for attraction...I don't get attracted to women easily and I have no problems being just friends with a girl, even if I find them physically attractive. The girl I mentioned who has been my best female friend for nearly 20 years...she's VERY attractive. I have no problem admitting that. Do I feel anything for her beyond friendship? Not in the SLIGHTEST. She's a very nice girl...sweetest girl you'll ever meet. Never has a bad thing to say and I don't think she's even capable of getting angry. But, she's a bit too sweet for my tastes. I like my women with some "bad" in them, if you know what I mean. I knew from the beginning that she wasn't my type, I didn't want to lead her on...I valued our friendship, and even though I knew she liked me, I just never went there. And I'm glad I didn't because she's been a great friend (both to me and now my wife) all these years and I would hate it if I never had her in my life.

[MrCastle]

All my female friends have always been attractive...in some cases, very much so. It's not that I choose them that way...it just happens. But I think a lot has to do with the fact that, back when I was younger, we used to party a lot...clubs, bars...whatever...and those were the kinds of girls that entered our circle of friends.

 

As for attraction...I don't get attracted to women easily and I have no problems being just friends with a girl, even if I find them physically attractive. The girl I mentioned who has been my best female friend for nearly 20 years...she's VERY attractive. I have no problem admitting that. Do I feel anything for her beyond friendship? Not in the SLIGHTEST. She's a very nice girl...sweetest girl you'll ever meet. Never has a bad thing to say and I don't think she's even capable of getting angry. But, she's a bit too sweet for my tastes. I like my women with some "bad" in them, if you know what I mean. I knew from the beginning that she wasn't my type, I didn't want to lead her on...I valued our friendship, and even though I knew she liked me, I just never went there. And I'm glad I didn't because she's been a great friend (both to me and now my wife) all these years and I would hate it if I never had her in my life.

 

Right, so even though she was physically attractive to you, she wasn't your type personality wise. So you didn't feel anything for her outside of a friendship. That's why it worked.

 

If you were like "oh man this girl is so awesome, I have to make her mine" and you asked her out and she said "sorry, I only see you as a friend", and you accepted that and willingly entered the friendzone, that's not a friendship. That's you perceiving a loss as a potential victory and trying to salvage a little something. That doesn't work. When one person likes the other in a romantic way, friends doesn't work.

 

I'm not interested in being friends with women after they've rejected my advances. If we both thought of each other in a platonic way, that's different.

[edgygirl]

I'm just not looking for female friends right now. I don't understand why this is such a controversial, radical idea. I don't see any purpose in making female friends when I'm a single guy looking to fool around with women for the short term.

 

Perhaps when I'm looking for love, for a long lasting relationship, that will change. But right now I don't see any upside to keeping women in my life who don't want to date me.

 

Not controversial. I couldn't care less if someone just wants to sleep around. My point is when the time comes when you (or any guy in this thread who is against having female friends - I wasn't talking only about you specifically) do decide to go after love, do you really think you will be able to successfuly relate to women, their psyché, their feelings and brains, if you clearly are not interested in doing it now? Will this desire and ability to relate to them in an emotional level suddenly burst, fall in your head out of nowhere? It takes practice to learn how to relate to the other gender's intricacies. Most people do it through having friends from the opposite sex, specially when not in a committed relationship. Plus I find it offensive that someone would decide that women are not interesting enough to be friends with (brain wise, enriching your brain wise). For sex only they are good hm? Yeah, makes perfect logic. For Guys. Who view women as sex objects.

[KungFuJoe]

Right, so even though she was physically attractive to you, she wasn't your type personality wise. So you didn't feel anything for her outside of a friendship. That's why it worked.

 

If you were like "oh man this girl is so awesome, I have to make her mine" and you asked her out and she said "sorry, I only see you as a friend", and you accepted that and willingly entered the friendzone, that's not a friendship. That's you accepting a loss as a potential victory and trying to salvage a little something. That doesn't work. When one person likes the other in a romantic way, friends doesn't work.

 

I'm not interested in being friends with women after they've rejected my advances. If we both thought of each other in a platonic way, that's different.

 

Well...yeah. Of course I couldn't be just friends with a girl I was INTO. That goes without saying.

 

All I'm saying is that it's perfectly possible to be just friends with the opposite sex. Nothing more.

 

If I missed something earlier in the thread, my apologies.

[TheZebra]

Ironically I give more advice than all of them and I haven't had much more success than they have . But I'm a lot happier than they are admittedly

 

And it shows! Trust me, girls notice the difference between happy and bitter faster than they notice hair color. You'll be fine

[iris219]

Spoke on this on somedude's thread--is this friend of yours a girl you're not attracted to? Because that can work. If two people aren't attracted to each other, friends can work. If one of you likes the other and just settled for the friendzone because they believe it's better than nothing, that's not a friendship, but a soft rejection. Those don't work. Since I only talk to women I'm attracted two, I'm faced with two outcomes: either she accepts my advances and we date, or she doesn't and I drop her. No real room for friends, unless after we tried dating we agreed to remain friends if it didn't work out in the end. But that's after we've already dated. I don't friend women who won't give me a chance to date them.

 

This makes me sad.

 

I love my male friends. We are like siblings in many ways. You are missing out on a lot by not having genuine female friends.

 

With my male friends and I, there was never any friend zoning. No one ever even thought about dating the other person. That's just not how we approached each other. Mature people don't become attracted to every opposite-sex person they meet, even if that person is attractive. Or if they do, they are able to suppress it to the point where it's a non-issue.

 

Cute story: The other night, I was at a crowded bar with some friends and my male friend was complaining that we'd never get drinks. Another male friend said, "Just send Iris up to the bar." The other replied, "Oh, yeah, I always that forget Iris is hot." It was actually really funny because he was so serious when he said it.

[Lonely Ronin]

Perhaps when I'm looking for love, for a long lasting relationship, that will change. But right now I don't see any upside to keeping women in my life who don't want to date me.

 

Again nothing wrong with it, but something you might consider is how this will negatively effect your ability to find someone special when you are ready to settle down. % or 10 years down the road, you are going to find that quality women that are still available are much fewer and far between, and thus much harder to randomly meet.

 

What i have seen in my own experiences, and with friends, is that our female friends are looking out for us, and usually more so than are male friends. They have single female friends, that they want to introduce us to, that you might not otherwise meet. Just last week, I got a text from a friend, that basically said; I'm having a party next week and my friend blank who is single is going to come, you should come and meet her.

 

This is on top of the free fashion advise, and what not :D

[MrCastle]

Well...yeah. Of course I couldn't be just friends with a girl I was INTO. That goes without saying.

 

All I'm saying is that it's perfectly possible to be just friends with the opposite sex. Nothing more.

 

If I missed something earlier in the thread, my apologies.

 

Yeah of course it can work. If both sides agree to keep it platonic of course it can work.

 

But if your only interest is dating women, friending goes nowhere.

 

You think these guys that are unsuccessful want to hear "well, you didn't land a date like you wanted, but here's a friend :)"

 

No. They're not looking for friends. And neither am I.

 

Like I said, I only approach women I see as dating potential. I'm not out there looking for pals. So there isn't any room there for me to make a friend, as I said before, either you accept my date, or we're not speaking.

[Necromancer]

This is what I don't get though. The OP, Colez Fanboy, Caius Ballad, and maybe a couple other like-minded individuals have bwwn some of our most prolific thread writers. Why is it that the guys who have the least success with women are the ones giving the most advice?

 

Since when am i praying here about how to get women?. (LMS aside)

 

I am no Spiderman.

[edgygirl]

Yeah of course it can work. If both sides agree to keep it platonic of course it can work.

 

But if your only interest is dating women, friending goes nowhere.

 

You think these guys that are unsuccessful want to hear "well, you didn't land a date like you wanted, but here's a friend :)"

 

No. They're not looking for friends. And neither am I.

 

Like I said, I only approach women I see as dating potential. I'm not out there looking for pals. So there isn't any room there for me to make a friend, as I said before, either you accept my date, or we're not speaking.

 

Translation: women are only good as sex objects. Sorry but I can't read it in any other way.

[Els]

It is absolutely no surprise that very similar people are repeatedly saying similar things, nope.

[dreamingoftigers]

No correlation. Most of the guys I know who get the most action say that there is no point in being with or hanging out with a female unless the end result of sex will occur. They state that they don't like putting up with a girl's roundabout dialogue. So no, it's not just me.

 

Your "hypothesis" falls flat on it's face.

 

Actually, (sorry, headed out for a drive right now so not digging for source material BUT will provide results)

 

The largest percentage of relationship starters happen through female friends and family members.

 

Female networks are the biggest contributor to dating relationships.

 

I.e. Friend 1 says to friend 2, "you know John is single again, remember you used to have that crush on him in junior high, should I ask?"

 

Or through female networks in church...etc.

 

Even just the fact that women gossip about make relationship statuses has been shown to affect hook-up rate.

 

From what I read if a single female wants to fund a marryable man, the best advice is to start talking to all of her female friends about what she is looking for and often those networks of women will interconnect.

 

My friend Jeremy is blind whichplays a heavy role in his dating prospects. The fact that he lives in his parent's basement isn't great either BUT it is 100% by choice as he has a Master's degree and has written historical novels.

 

He has two female friends. The other one hooks him up in dates with some of the craziest bitches I have ever met/heard of, including my ex-friend A, which is how I met him to begin with.

 

I personally have set him up with 3 women and have mentioned him around to others. He's a good guy BUT he isn't too outgoing.

 

Why does he get dates? Because he has female friends that care...

[MrCastle]

This makes me sad.

 

I love my male friends. We are like siblings in many ways. You are missing out on a lot by not having genuine female friends. [/Quote]

 

Right now I see no benefit in making friends with females.

 

With my male friends and I, there was never any friend zoning. No one ever even thought about dating the other person. That's just not how we approached each other. Mature people don't become attracted to every opposite-sex person they meet, even if that person is attractive. Or if they do, they are able to suppress it to the point where it's a non-issue. [/Quote]

 

Who said anything about me being attracted to every woman I meet? I only go after women I'm attracted to, true--but that doesn't mean it's every girl.

 

 

Cute story: The other night, I was at a crowded bar with some friends and my male friend was complaining that we'd never get drinks. Another male friend said, "Just send Iris up to the bar." The other replied, "Oh, yeah, I always that forget Iris is hot." It was actually really funny because he was so serious when he said it.

 

That is a cute story.

[somedude81]

Ironically I give more advice than all of them and I haven't had much more success than they have . But I'm a lot happier than they are admittedly

How many times have you had sex in the past two months?

 

Me and the guys you're talking about, that number is zero.

[Els]

This thread has really brought out the clones, hasn't it?

[MrCastle]

Again nothing wrong with it, but something you might consider is how this will negatively effect your ability to find someone special when you are ready to settle down. % or 10 years down the road, you are going to find that quality women that are still available are much fewer and far between, and thus much harder to randomly meet.

 

What i have seen in my own experiences, and with friends, is that our female friends are looking out for us, and usually more so than are male friends. They have single female friends, that they want to introduce us to, that you might not otherwise meet. Just last week, I got a text from a friend, that basically said; I'm having a party next week and my friend blank who is single is going to come, you should come and meet her.

 

This is on top of the free fashion advise, and what not :D

 

Eh, but this setting up business isn't gender specific. Some of my friends in LTR try to hook me up with girls they meet in school and work and such because they themselves can't act on it. They're already set in the romance department, so they help out their single bros. So I don't feel like I'm missing anything in that regard.

[MrCastle]

Translation: women are only good as sex objects. Sorry but I can't read it in any other way.

 

Sounds bad when you say it like that

[KungFuJoe]

If you think all I say is negativity' date=' you really need to look around. Is it really any surprise that some people are repeatedly saying similar things? It's probably because these things happen in real life. [b']A lot of women are after looks, money, status, and power. If a guy doesn't have at least status in any environment, he's done for[/b]. A lot of people are angry that the things mom and pop told them don't work in real life. You only need to reference Brad Pitt's quote in Fight Club for that one.

 

I never said any gender was superior than the other. But we need to stop with the politically-correct mantra that the genders are equal.

 

You know...we can go back and forth all day long til we're red in the face. Nothing I say will change your mind (unfortunately) and nothing you say to me will make me change mind (fortunately).

 

But, there is ONE huge difference between the two of us. One of us is happy, in a committed and trusting relationship...and the other isn't.

 

Now, I'm not saying this to brag or say I'm better than you. I'm not. But, one thing I've learned in my long life of 38 years is that you make your own luck and your outlook and attitude in life have a LOT to do with your experiences.

[TheZebra]

Right now I see no benefit in making friends with females.

 

The question here is, would you reject one as a friend if you both started out purely platonic?

 

I don't know what your hobbies/interests are, but let's pretend you love football and love playing it. Let's also pretend a girl comes along and joins your group because she also loves football. You don't find her attractive, and she doesn't find you attractive either. You both love football and talking football though. Assume she gets along great with your group of friends.

 

Would you hang out with her, or only with your male football buddies?

 

It sounds stupid, but at least to me that's how I met all of my current guy friends. I didn't go out and say 'I must find male friends' I just found them through a common interest. I think that's how most people do it.

[MrCastle]

The question here is, would you reject one as a friend if you both started out purely platonic?

 

I don't know what your hobbies/interests are, but let's pretend you love football and love playing it. Let's also pretend a girl comes along and joins your group because she also loves football. You don't find her attractive, and she doesn't find you attractive either. You both love football and talking football though. Assume she gets along great with your group of friends.

 

Would you hang out with her, or only with your male football buddies?

 

It sounds stupid, but at least to me that's how I met all of my current guy friends. I didn't go out and say 'I must find male friends' I just found them through a common interest. I think that's how most people do it.

 

That's what I've been saying. That's fine. Platonic friends is fine. That can work.

[ThaWholigan]

How many times have you had sex in the past two months?

 

Me and the guys you're talking about, that number is zero.

You see it like that and yet none of you listen to me

[edgygirl]

The only way men will ever "relate" to women and their psyche is through extensive use of various psychedelics and uppers/downers, doesn't take practice or experience.

 

You clearly never had ONE good relationship in your lifetime. No wonder you're bitter about women.

 

Well, maybe if women were a little more interesting. There's really no difference between an 11 year old girl and a 20 year old woman when it comes to trying to talk politics or economics, it's either fueled by complete ignorance and wishful thinking or they're simply parroting their dad/boyfriend/teacher/male coworker.

 

A-ham... that goes back to my usual point of why a guy who is 35-40 shouldn't seek 20 yo. Not that I want to get into that AGAIN. Noooo. Please don't answer this cause I am not going there again.

[KungFuJoe]

Right now I see no benefit in making friends with females.

 

I'm not going to judge you (well...I guess I am) but I think this is a very narrow minded point of view.

 

I mean, you are basically effectively eliminating HALF of the world's population from even the opportunity to be your friend.

 

This might sound harsh, but I'm just going to come out and say it.

 

I think you view women as "objects". Again, not trying to insult you and you might very well think I'm nuts...but it's the feeling I get from reading your posts. I don't think you view women as "people"...but just objects to feed your ego and get what you want.

 

I don't think you are a "bad" person because I don't think you are purposely out to hurt anyone or lie or be dishonest. So, in a sense, I'm not saying you are doing anything DIRECTLY wrong. But, I think unless you change your mindset and stop viewing women as "the other sex" and just EVERYONE as people...you will be in for some hard times later on in life when you're tired of running around and just want to find that ONE special person to be with.

[KungFuJoe]

I do want to add that I think you're a cool person...and one of the more level headed people on LS.

 

I could also very well be COMPLETELY wrong about you. but, again...just the feeling I get.

 

Feel free to give me the finger.

[edgygirl]

I'm not going to judge you (well...I guess I am) but I think this is a very narrow minded point of view.

 

I mean, you are basically effectively eliminating HALF of the world's population from even the opportunity to be your friend.

 

This might sound harsh, but I'm just going to come out and say it.

 

I think you view women as "objects". Again, not trying to insult you and you might very well think I'm nuts...but it's the feeling I get from reading your posts. I don't think you view women as "people"...but just objects to feed your ego and get what you want.

 

I don't think you are a "bad" person because I don't think you are purposely out to hurt anyone or lie or be dishonest. So, in a sense, I'm not saying you are doing anything DIRECTLY wrong. But, I think unless you change your mindset and stop viewing women as "the other sex" and just EVERYONE as people...you will be in for some hard times later on in life when you're tired of running around and just want to find that ONE special person to be with.

 

That's exactly what I always try to hint to him, but he keeps thinking I am judging that he doesn't want a relationship now and wants to sleep around. It's not about now, it's about what you're doing now will impact your future ability to relate to women when you're ready to look for a LTR, MrCastle.