TerpVet87 Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 So I dated this girl for a year and some change and lived with her for almost a year. I broke up with her 3 months ago. I still loved her a lot and my decision was very hard. We both expressed an interest in getting back together and were seeing each other and going on dates together. She was already fantasizing about our wedding, naming kids, etc before we had even worked out the kinks in our relationship and gotten back together. Any time I wanted to talk about anything practical she would accuse me of starting a fight, and then she would start a fight. I told her she was jumping the gun and we had a lot of work to do as a couple and she flipped out at me and told me she quits. I stayed in contact with her over the next couple of days. Fighting and reconciling had been a cycle even after the breakup, so I expected her to come around. She was acting weird and her messages were brief, and finally she told me she met someone and that she kissed him. I was livid, I tried to cut all contact with her, but sometimes I got weak and contacted her. I didn't speak to her for days until recently when I was moving out of the apartment we had rented together. I was already depressed because I was moving out of the place we moved in together and I kept on finding her stuff everywhere. I told her I had bagged up some of her stuff and left it on the porch for her to get later. Then I texted her and told her it was sad that we weren't together and I probably would have proposed to her on graduation and her response was "f*** you. I hate you so much" then she dropped the bombshell, "my new bf ALWAYS makes me cum JUST from sex!". I felt like I was going to be sick. I've had some bad breakups and been angry at ex's before, but I would never ever be so mean. Why even say something like that to someone? Our sex life wasn't even bad. I'm devastated after hearing that. I know she is just trying to upset me, and it's working. We were just talking about getting back together 2 weeks ago! I feel awful now, back to square 1.
Keenly Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 two things 1. She is lying. 2. She is lying with the sole intent of hurting you. She is only saying things that she knows will affect you, regardless of truth content. My ex (trapped with her, we worked together) was telling me about parties and hooking up with strangers after we broke up a long time ago. Luckily for you, yours sound like lies.
Author TerpVet87 Posted December 28, 2012 Author Posted December 28, 2012 Thanks for the quick response. Even if she's lying it still hurts. I've never met a woman as angry as her in my life. After she said that I just told her I hope that one day she can let go of all that anger and be happy. Even though she hurts me and is unbelievably mean I just feel sorry for her.
Missing Him Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 Even if she's lying it still hurts. Exactly. And that was clearly her intention. For whatever reason, she wanted to hurt you. And it has worked. You're hurt.
sadbunnyy Posted December 28, 2012 Posted December 28, 2012 Don't believe her. That's a lie. She just wanted to hurt you...kinda sad that she stooped that low.. My ex broke up with me, he said VERY hurtful things but I never said one thing to hurt him! He contacted me recently a few days ago and I remained respectful and sweet. I guess I have a big heart..Idk. Just be the bigger person... at least you wont regret anything later. Kill'em with kindness lol..
Author TerpVet87 Posted December 28, 2012 Author Posted December 28, 2012 Sadbunny, I am the exact same way. I was wondering if I was just too nice now. In my younger days I would have fired right back at her something awful too, but what's the point?
Author TerpVet87 Posted December 29, 2012 Author Posted December 29, 2012 Well I felt fine all day, I kept busy and even have a few dates lined up with some really nice girls, but now that the day is winding down I feel like crap again. Don't know why but I always feel the worst at night.
TaraMaiden Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 You want to know why? because it's like having a really bad cold.... It's always worse at night... This is because your physical functions are winding and calming don to relax and regenerate during the night... Your body is busy during the night, recharging and repairing any deterioration in your system - so while your body is calm and the adrenalin levels are lower, your cold comes to the fore and manifests especially strongly. It's not necessarily a whole lot worse at night - it's just that as your system is winding down, the intensity appears greater.... It'a the same with your mental state: During the day, you're mentally active and inter-active with others, and your mindset is occupied with a multitude of input to deal with. At night, your stimuli are restricted, and there is less distraction... this is why we often feel better after a good night's sleep - and why, when we're in mental turmoil, we're advised to 'sleep on it'.... That's my theory and I'm sticking to it - but there's a lot of truth in it too.... Have a warm milky drink, read a book, or write your thoughts down.. it doesn't matter if they're jumbled, hyper-emotional or non-sequential - just write down automatically what comes into your head.... then when you're done, put it down, turn off the light and rest... In the morning, don't read what you've put. Just burn it, flush it or destroy it. It feels good.
HurtinUnit Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 Wow.... Wow, wow, wow... I can't even wrap my head around how some people can just sink to such a level. Keep your head up and stay far away from that one. Go on those dates, have fun and forget this... It's just not worth your time, and seriously, if you get any messages from her again, I wouldn't even read them. I know that's a difficult thing to do but, really try. DELETE!!!
Author TerpVet87 Posted December 29, 2012 Author Posted December 29, 2012 Taramaiden, awesome post thanks. Haha I guess there's nothing supernatural to feeling this way at night then. I'm going to block her cell number online with verizon and am considering having a family member change my password for me so I can't log on to unblock her, at least until I'm in a better state. I also deleted my Facebook account months ago so I'm lucky I don't have to deal with that. 1
TaraMaiden Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 write down a completely forgettable password, like this: xytt99i03ggh1l6m8854k6. Confirm it, letter/number by letter/number. Destroy the bit of paper you wrote it on. Submit. Block all emails from the admin of that site - because they might ask you to verify by clicking on a link. Do so, then block their admin emails, and delete all existing emails from them. That way, contacting them will be more difficult. Then delete the site from your 'favourites' and eliminate 'history' and delete the cookies - clear them. This is a belt and braces method, but it works...
Author TerpVet87 Posted December 30, 2012 Author Posted December 30, 2012 Just to clarify she's one of these girls (the majority from what I understand) who doesn't orgasm from sex alone. Now I almost always, unless she said it was ok, took care of her first before sex then she would usually get off again during sex, so she would get a 2 for 1 deal most of the time. It's not like she was unhappy with sex. If anyone was unhappy it was me. She claims she has ADD so if I was going down on her and her contact dried out, or a car honked, or the heat kicked on, she'd get distracted and it was like starting all over again. Very frustrating and very painful for my tongue to do that for 45 min straight.
Chi townD Posted December 30, 2012 Posted December 30, 2012 Woman know how to hurt a guy in the worst way and it's ALWAYS below the belt. I'm surprised that she didn't say anything about how much bigger her new bf friend is! It's typical and only a means to hurt you....nothing more and she's probably lying. 1
Author TerpVet87 Posted December 30, 2012 Author Posted December 30, 2012 I'm pretty confident about my size so I'd know she's lying. Anyways I was a Marine Sgt and an Iraq and Afghanistan veteran so at least metaphorically speaking mines bigger than whatever loser she's dating and she knows it. Thanks to everyone for the nice responses. I feel much better.
silvermane187 Posted January 1, 2013 Posted January 1, 2013 This bitch is just trying to hurt you. You need to block her from contacting you in any way. When it comes to mental warfare you don't want to be ****ing with a female that knows how to hurt you. You will lose.
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