ilu Posted August 16, 2004 Share Posted August 16, 2004 I'm confused. My bf has never said "I love You" to me before, we've been together for almost 4 years, he's the kind of men don't like speaking it out, he rather shows it with actions. The thing is, he did say "I love you" to some of his ex-s, that means he CAN and WILL say it . I told him "i love you" twice , but i never got his response. My question is , does he love me? maybe he is not! I know ever man is different, but if he DID say that before to his ex-s....... but i haven't got it yet........ well...... that makes me confused and worry. Link to post Share on other sites
pip_squeak Posted August 17, 2004 Share Posted August 17, 2004 4 years??!!?? i dunno there, my man fell in love after about 8 months... properly in love. But 4 years?! What does everyone else think? Link to post Share on other sites
KitCat Posted August 17, 2004 Share Posted August 17, 2004 Maybe since he said 'I love you' to his exs and they are now... well, EXs... then maybe he values what you two have much more than what he had with those exs. Maybe he feels like 'I love you' doesn't really get across how he actually feels about you, because he used it to describe how he felt about them, and how he feels about you is much more deep and real. Perhaps his SHOWING you his love for you is his way of really making you know how he feels. When you think about it, they ARE just words. However, if he doesn't say it back to you when you say it... hm.. i don't really know what to say. But, I don't think it's wrong at all to tell him how you feel, and say 'I love you' even without him responding the same way. If his actions really do, in all honesty, show his LOVE for you.. then I wouldn't sit around and wait for WORDS. Link to post Share on other sites
ladyangel Posted August 17, 2004 Share Posted August 17, 2004 I wouldn't stay with a man who hadn't told me he loved me in four years! How much more time does he need? Link to post Share on other sites
KitCat Posted August 17, 2004 Share Posted August 17, 2004 Some people just find the words meaningless. Some just don't use the term 'I love you.' And it's NOT a big deal to them. Maybe he did it in the past just to pacify the women. If it's that huge of an issue.. talk to him. Just seems like... if he REALLY is showing her that he loves her and that he does think of her as 'the one' then what are words? I know that sounds kind of weird, but that's just because we're so programmed into thinking you have to say it when you love someone, and if they truly love you, they'll say it back. But some people don't, and yet they can still love. Talk to him about it if you must. Link to post Share on other sites
Touch_of_Naughtiness Posted August 18, 2004 Share Posted August 18, 2004 I had a boyfriend who I was with for about 5 months but had know for a long time and he never told me I love you, even though I told him all the time. After those 5 months we broke up and got back together 2 years after and once again my feelings resurfaced. I told him I loved him and he did not reply, some time after, while making love, he told me I love you without me having to say anything!!! I knew that he meant it because he had never felt pressured into saying it, no matter how many times I said it. That actually made me value him even more and value what "I love you" means . I think that most people misuse those words. Even though they are 3 small words they hold a lot of power to them!!!!!!!!! If he has not told you yet maybe he does not feel it. At least he's not telling you something just to please you even though he does not feel it. Link to post Share on other sites
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