what is this guy's deal?

[Rebecca2009]

so I met this guy on match, and we have been hanging out since september. in that amount of time, he only asked me on one official date (to a beer tasting) and we usually just hang out at my place. we have only made out once and havent done anything more. I really like this guy and he seems to like me. but then a few weeks ago he randomly told me he just wants to be friends, but still wants to hang out alot. so I intended to sort of ignore him, but we have hung out a few more times. he then told me one night that he was shooting himself in the foot for saying he just wanted to be friends and the only reason he has been awkward with me and slow is because he has been trying to get over someone. so then the next day he asked me to a barn mass at his parents house and I went to that. I met a couple of his siblings and we had a good time.he even texted me the next day thanking me for coming and said he was glad I came. (i also forgot to mention we kissed when I left the barn mass). so now he has gone almost two days without texting me. It is his christmas vacation and he could be busy, but should I wonder if he is seeing a bunch of other girls or something else? ir should I just text him and see what happens? he is very confusing to.me. I could just be super overreacting. lol

[TaraMaiden]

Yes, text him. Better still, ring him and use an actual voice (you come equipped with that) to maybe set a date...

 

I really think people should talk more and text less.

[mortensorchid]

Hmmm, talk about mixed messages here. After saying he just wants to be friends he then takes you to meet his family? I don't know about this, he sounds like he is flip flopping on things. He either will or won't, and he seems to be leaning towards not. I'd just let it stand. If he wants to see you he will see you, if not, he will move on. But don't text so much, if you want to talk to him call him and vice versa.

[Meetvirginia]

I had a similar experience a few months ago. I was spending time with a guy and he ran hot and cold. Came on strong for awhile,then gave me the "Let's just be friends" speech and ignored me for awhile. Then would come back around and run hot again. I decided finally to go no-contact and stop torturing myself and right before i did, i found out that not only did he have a serious long-distance gf but was also juggling several other girls besides myself at the same time. Made it that much easier for me! What an arsehole! But it explained his flip-flopping...when he was having trouble with the other girls,he came around more. When things were going well for him,he ran cold and ignored me. So that's my theory when a man acts this way,is that he is involved with at least one other girl, if not more. Hope you figure things out. Try backing off and give him some space,maybe he will come around and maybe he won't. And hopefully when/if he does,you will be strong enough to say you are no longerinterested. Because imo,you will spare yourself some heartache that way. Good luck to you.

[gullibleme]

I think Rebecca2009 should just listen to what he said....after all he did take her to meet family and that is kind of a big step...he is currently trying to get over someone and she should just take it slow with him...if it goes somewhere then it does. He seems to be in a mess of confusion and it just takes time,I was there when trying to move on after my breakup...give him the benefit of the doubt that he is wanting to move on from the previous relationship...we all have to start somewhere and dating in the beginning is hard after a breakup.

[veggirl]

I would forget him. What is he doing on a dating site if he is not over his ex? Ugh. Do you want to be his rebound? It's been 3 months and nothing has progressed. You should move on, you are wasting your time.