Negative Nancy Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 What if all 10 girls were overweight? I'm just using that example because you mentioned not being attracted to them. Then would it really matter? Yes, that was exactly my point. Didn't SD even have a thread whining about how "only" fat chicks have been interested in him?
terlislee Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 If you read his post you would notice that SD didn't talk about sex at all. Well okay then. Re your facebook math it doesn't really work like that. Girls always get complimented on their looks, dress etc. since they are little and by both genders. It's how society works, so most of the time they will always have more FB likes and comments on their pictures than even the hot guys. I have male friends, co-workers, classmates etc. complimenting me all the time - does any of them want to date me? Not really. Just as I will much likely comment on how attractive my female friend looks than like a picture of my male crush. Doesn't mean I'm not interested in him.
edgygirl Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 Is growing old alone really better than being married to a guy who treats her like a queen even though she's not completely attracted to him? Not to mention she will most likely also have kids. That's the reasoning the guy who begged me to stay with him used earlier this year. The response is yes, I prefer to be cat-lady alone than with someone I'm not feelin' it with after trying for several months. And I don't even like cats 2
somedude81 Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 What if all 10 girls were overweight? I'm just using that example because you mentioned not being attracted to them. Then would it really matter? It would be highly unlikely that all ten would be undesirable. Just as how if a woman has 20 guys ask her out, it would be highly unlikely that all of them would be undesirable. That's why I said if I had 10 girls into me, most likely I'd be willing to give a trial date to half of them. And there would most likely be 1 or 2 girls that I would be interested in.
somedude81 Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 That's the reasoning the guy who begged me to stay with him used earlier this year. The response is yes, I prefer to be cat-lady alone than with someone I'm not feelin' it with after trying for several months. And I don't even like cats I just see that as being really sad. As long as the guy doesn't actually turn you off, I don't understand why not.
TheZebra Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 Why is that such a hard thing to believe? There's 3 billion men on this planet and I'm pretty sure I can automatically rule out at least 1 billion of them as potential dating partners right now without even looking at a picture. I'm looking at my FB right now. Out of ~250 friends, about 150 are men. Out of those 150, there's only 1 that I'm actively interested in. Therefore, if the other 149 liked my picture I wouldn't care. Out of those remaining 149, there's maybe 5 that if they asked me out on a date I'd say yes. And like another poster noted, I rarely, if ever, like/comment on something my crush does on FB since I guess I don't want to give myself away. I'm WAY more likely to like/comment on the postings of people I have no interest in.
somedude81 Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 (edited) Why is that such a hard thing to believe? There's 3 billion men on this planet and I'm pretty sure I can automatically rule out at least 1 billion of them as potential dating partners right now without even looking at a picture. I'm looking at my FB right now. Out of ~250 friends, about 150 are men. Out of those 150, there's only 1 that I'm actively interested in. Therefore, if the other 149 liked my picture I wouldn't care. Out of those remaining 149, there's maybe 5 that if they asked me out on a date I'd say yes. So if 150 men on your FB asked you out you'd say yes to only 5? That's 1 out of 30 men, No wonder dating is so freaking hard for the average man. Math editing Edited December 29, 2012 by somedude81
Lonely Ronin Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 I just see that as being really sad. As long as the guy doesn't actually turn you off, I don't understand why not. I know someone will most likely accuse me of busting your balls, for saying this.... For some of us having things in common, and physical attraction, even significant physical attraction isn't enough. 2
TheZebra Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 So if 150 men on your FB asked you out you'd say yes to only 5? That's 1 out of 30 men, No wonder dating is so freaking hard for the average man. Math editing Technically 6, if you count the crush. Remember, since I have them on FB, I know them more than I would a random guy at the bar. There's a lot of handsome faces on my friends list, but I know that (for example) one of them is stuck-up, the other cheated on his last girlfriend, another did absolutely no work on a group project in class but got the same grade as me anyway, another is too immature, another is a complete pot head, another is younger than me, etc.
Negative Nancy Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 (edited) eavesdrop on any boys' night, regardless of the socioeconomic demographic. Most of the time, you'll hear at least a few comments about women they find attractive who happen to not be their partners. This is reality. Accept it. Unfortunately I know this from first hand-experience, but if this is really true for ALL men, then no man is worth committing and being loyal to since obviously one woman is never enough for them anyway. Being single beats being settled for and getting cheated on later when those very same women men talk about in their "men talk" conversations actually show interest in them. If the man's girlfriend isn't the personal "10" to him, men will then have a very hard time resisting the temptation of the woman they deep down REALLY want. The risk of being cheated on by such men is just too high. It doesn't matter if the man in your life is the love of your life to the point where all other men fade in comparison - it just isn't the same experience for men. One woman isn't enough for them, they will always lust after other women and cheat if there's an opportunity. It just shows women truly are the more loyal gender, and that being loyal is neither reciprocated nor appreciated. Edited December 29, 2012 by Negative Nancy 1
edgygirl Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 No wonder dating is so freaking hard for the average man. Are men interested in most women they know? Doubt it. Would they have sex with most women they know, if they could? Possibly. Correct me if I'm wrong 1
xxoo Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 I just see that as being really sad. As long as the guy doesn't actually turn you off, I don't understand why not. Because you are not a woman. You have a binary system: turn on, or turn off. Women are more complex, and can feel neutral toward a man--neither turned on, nor turned off. It doesn't make for a satisfying love life. 1
edgygirl Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 I just see that as being really sad. As long as the guy doesn't actually turn you off, I don't understand why not. Because I need to feel lust that is real and not invented by my mind. I'd be miserable going to bed forever with someone who doesn't turn me on that much, who I don't crave. Even when sex is 'alright'. I tried, but it felt off.
xxoo Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 My opinion? She needs to be in arranged marriage or she's going to become a cat lady and inadvertently cause a man to remain single. Is growing old alone really better than being married to a guy who treats her like a queen even though she's not completely attracted to him? Not to mention she will most likely also have kids. As women age, we tend to feel less motivated to settle for anything less than truly feeling it. Growing old alone is not so bad for women, who typically have stronger social networks than men. Being treated like a queen is not the common marriage experience for women, after a few years of marriage (although there are exceptions! ) 1
GoodOnPaper Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 It doesn't matter if the man in your life is the love of your life to the point where all other men fade in comparison - it just isn't the same experience for men. Does the average guy really reach this point? Sure, one's wife may be happy, content, may think he's great, etc. but I have a hard time believing that it translates into this kind of carnal "lust" . . . Because I need to feel lust that is real and not invented by my mind. . . . like that shown for much more attractive guys with more ONS/FWB appeal.
xxoo Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 Does the average guy really reach this point? Sure, one's wife may be happy, content, may think he's great, etc. but I have a hard time believing that it translates into this kind of carnal "lust" . . . It is largely mental. It isn't about looks. An "average" guy in looks can still make that kind of connection with a woman--even with his wife. My H can drive me wild with lust, but it doesn't happen just by looking at him. He's got to tease a bit. He knows what to do 1
GoodOnPaper Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 It is largely mental. It isn't about looks. An "average" guy in looks can still make that kind of connection with a woman--even with his wife. I don't know . . . I'd feel better about things if I had been able to attract even one person for a casual ONS/FWB thing when I was single.
somedude81 Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 Are men interested in most women they know? Doubt it. Would they have sex with most women they know, if they could? Possibly. Correct me if I'm wrong I'm interested in a hell of a lot more than 1 out of 30 girls that's for damn sure. Put 30 appropriate aged ranged women in front of me and I'll probably be attracted to 20 of them. Of those 20, 10 or so would be cool enough for me to want to get to know them better.
xxoo Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 I don't know . . . I'd feel better about things if I had been able to attract even one person for a casual ONS/FWB thing when I was single. Isn't the woman already in your bed the most important one to be able to seduce? Think of it this way--a man might seduce many woman in his life, and still be unable to turn on his wife after a couple years. So much is mental for women--much more than many men understand. 1
edgygirl Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 . . . like that shown for much more attractive guys with more ONS/FWB appeal. I don't know . . . I'd feel better about things if I had been able to attract even one person for a casual ONS/FWB thing when I was single.Nah... ONS are kind of lame even if there's a lot of animal, raw attraction there. It's not about 'much more attractive guys'. I've been with average guys who turned me on much more than the hot ones I've been with. It's more than looks.
dreamingoftigers Posted December 30, 2012 Posted December 30, 2012 The older I get, the more I find this true and the more like a fool I feel for ever having gotten married. Unfortunately I know this from first hand-experience, but if this is really true for ALL men, then no man is worth committing and being loyal to since obviously one woman is never enough for them anyway. Being single beats being settled for and getting cheated on later when those very same women men talk about in their "men talk" conversations actually show interest in them. If the man's girlfriend isn't the personal "10" to him, men will then have a very hard time resisting the temptation of the woman they deep down REALLY want. The risk of being cheated on by such men is just too high. It doesn't matter if the man in your life is the love of your life to the point where all other men fade in comparison - it just isn't the same experience for men. One woman isn't enough for them, they will always lust after other women and cheat if there's an opportunity. It just shows women truly are the more loyal gender, and that being loyal is neither reciprocated nor appreciated.
Recommended Posts