Author ConfusedHumanBeing Posted December 28, 2012 Author Posted December 28, 2012 The problem with all of this is the biggest parts of the year for us was these next several weeks. Christmas (25th), New Years (1st), her birthday (3rd), my birthday (8th), and anniversary (17th). All of those dates....oh man all I can do is just get upset. I'm trying my best not to text her and go NC again....but its so hard for me. Our mutual friend (not really my best friend her friend because of me) graduated from the Air Force today, so I texted her about it and she said "that's good I am glad"....you know what's even worse? My entire goal was to get done with my job (I worked college football), fly down to Florida with her to our first vacation spot and ask her to marry me......that was to be today. Sigh.....im sorry it's just a hard day.
cavalier99 Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 The problem with all of this is the biggest parts of the year for us was these next several weeks. Christmas (25th), New Years (1st), her birthday (3rd), my birthday (8th), and anniversary (17th). All of those dates....oh man all I can do is just get upset. I'm trying my best not to text her and go NC again....but its so hard for me. Our mutual friend (not really my best friend her friend because of me) graduated from the Air Force today, so I texted her about it and she said "that's good I am glad"....you know what's even worse? My entire goal was to get done with my job (I worked college football), fly down to Florida with her to our first vacation spot and ask her to marry me......that was to be today. Sigh.....im sorry it's just a hard day. YOU WONT RECOVER IF YOU KEEP ON TEXTING HER. What your are doing is like beating yourself upside the head until you pass out. Eventually you'll stop but you'll be in for weeks or months worth of more pain if you keep this up.
Author ConfusedHumanBeing Posted December 29, 2012 Author Posted December 29, 2012 YOU WONT RECOVER IF YOU KEEP ON TEXTING HER. What your are doing is like beating yourself upside the head until you pass out. Eventually you'll stop but you'll be in for weeks or months worth of more pain if you keep this up. I know Cav.....I know. I get so panicked that I feel like I have to say something!! I have to stop
cavalier99 Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 (edited) I know Cav.....I know. I get so panicked that I feel like I have to say something!! I have to stop You already know this but need to accept it. She is the source of your pain (well technically you are at this point). If you text her you'll feel good for about a minute. If you disassociate (NC) at least your suffering will be worthwhile and intense pain and panic attacks and feelings of complete insanity will lessen. Shoot for 3 weeks NC to start. Edited December 29, 2012 by cavalier99
coffeebean201 Posted December 29, 2012 Posted December 29, 2012 It is good you have people to talk to about this. Talking about it really helps. At the end of the day, worrying about who she may or may not be having sex with, is very controlling. And you have to let go of that control over her - even if it is just in your mind. Hopefully the days get a bit better. You sound like a great guy. Treat yourself well and be gentle with yourself until this turns the corner. Hugs.
Author ConfusedHumanBeing Posted December 29, 2012 Author Posted December 29, 2012 You already know this but need to accept it. She is the source of your pain (well technically you are at this point). If you text her you'll feel good for about a minute. If you disassociate (NC) at least your suffering will be worthwhile and intense pain and panic attacks and feelings of complete insanity will lessen. Shoot for 3 weeks NC to start. Cav nailing it as usual. Yeah, I'm going to work towards 3 weeks at first. That was right about the last time I went NC how long it lasted. Should be a blast lol. I got some good football to watch the next two days, so that should keep me busy and my mind off of it.....lots of prescription drugs as well haha.
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