planC Posted December 26, 2012 Posted December 26, 2012 even tho i haven't spoken to her since july, and im depressed, lost my job, lost my apartment, cut myself off from all of my friends, and now i'm a loser... outweighing everything else making me a miserable div this christmas.. is her, i cant stop thinking about how it all happened... we knew each other for 7 years, since we we're 14/16 now i'm 21, and fell IN LOVE with her at the start of this year, APPARENTLY she did the same... but when things got bad mid-year, it wasnt hard for her to walk away from everything and move on with another guy within a matter of weeks... she was my first REAL love, but i wasnt hers, actually i dont believe she even loved me at all... i think she was just really good at making me believe she did when we were together, but the way she ended it in july and completely cut me out of her life to this day and probably forever... its hard to believe she ever loved me... i feel like before this year i was a normal functioning guy living a young mans life... she came along and shattered my world and left me a shadow of what i once was, she blasted through like a tornado for 6 months turned everything upside down and left me to pick up the pieces..
Missing Him Posted December 26, 2012 Posted December 26, 2012 I'm sorry to hear that you're going through this You're only 21 years old though, you still have your whole life ahead of you. I know it sounds cliche and it's not what you want to hear, but you have to force yourself to get better. Maybe you should consider seeing a therapist to help you deal with your depression?
Author planC Posted December 26, 2012 Author Posted December 26, 2012 I'm sorry to hear that you're going through this You're only 21 years old though, you still have your whole life ahead of you. I know it sounds cliche and it's not what you want to hear, but you have to force yourself to get better. Maybe you should consider seeing a therapist to help you deal with your depression? i've been depressed before, the only way i managed to get better was throwing myself into the world and helping myself... ive got to do that again, and ive tried in bursts... but the occasional night out with friends and one night stand is only temporary. i feel like im going to have to move away and start from scratch, in the new year i'm hoping to find a new job and start saving to move away
Cam116 Posted December 26, 2012 Posted December 26, 2012 Sorry you're going through this, but you are not alone! Thinking of the positives is what has been helping me. Granted, I'm still going through the roller coaster emotions every day, but I've learned (and quickly) that the negative thoughts are fleeting and will pass. Think of positives: you are young. Save money and move away! It can be a great healing to start over fresh! I'm trying to remind myself of all the positives that will come out of this split, the main one being that I will move back home for a year until I'm finished school and save money so that when I graduate and get a job, I will have plenty saved up for my own apartment or house. I know it's hard to look ahead and see a once-filled-calendar suddenly become an empty slate, but think of all of the possibilities you can now fill it with! Good luck. Hope I myself can keep the positive attitude as well
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