sweet_cumquat Posted December 25, 2012 Posted December 25, 2012 Key facts that put me in this situation and don't let me change it : - still in high school - living in a small town And the situation is - can't find the normal people to hang out Don't stop reading please! I'm not some kind of asocial, lonely teenager, in fact I've got no problem finding company to spend my free time with. I used to be shy, but now I improved and got much more open and outgoing. But-- the trouble is finding people like me, who are passionate about many things, who enjoy life and every opportunity it gives us every day and want to improve themselves. It seems like most of my peers are negative, always complain while they have everything necessary for normal living, find life purpose in posting pics and statuses on facebook(mostly trying to convince others they're happy with themselves), or drinking long into the night. Don't get me wrong, I know how to relax, but I don't wanna make it my lifestyle. People like that surround me, and I can spend a lot of time with them, but those relationships don't fulfill me. I know what you're gonna say: join a club or activity you enjoy and you'll find like minded people. But since I'm living in a small town, my favorite sports and activities are not available, and they'll have to wait for about 2yrs when I move out to go to college I tried other sports/activities even if they're not really my passion, just to occupy myself with sth, and stay fit. But I had to stop dancing (jazz dance,breakdance) because of injury at the age of 13. It took it 3 yrs to heal completely, but now I can't really join anything cause my peers are already training for many yrs and I would have to play with kids 5 yrs younger... The only thing that's left for me here is football (yeah I'm a girl). I used to play it a lot when I was a kid, I loved it, but never really thought about joining a club,(at that time I was pretty much worried what would my family and friends say). Now I accidentally got to know girls' team coach(ironically we were together on a physiotherapy) , and she told me I could join if I wanted, she'd put me in my age group. I've been thinking a lot about it recently, and I don't know. I'm kind of scared cause it's a rough sport and I could get injured again, and because I met so many people and just can't click with them for some reason . (It's really exhausting always being different). On the contrary a smile crosses my face when I remember how I used to play it often with classmates, and how I enjoyed every second of it. Any advice how to improve my situation, with or without football ?? Is it problem in me, or in my perspective? Thanks
todreaminblue Posted December 25, 2012 Posted December 25, 2012 (edited) Key facts that put me in this situation and don't let me change it : - still in high school - living in a small town And the situation is - can't find the normal people to hang out Don't stop reading please! I'm not some kind of asocial, lonely teenager, in fact I've got no problem finding company to spend my free time with. I used to be shy, but now I improved and got much more open and outgoing. But-- the trouble is finding people like me, who are passionate about many things, who enjoy life and every opportunity it gives us every day and want to improve themselves. It seems like most of my peers are negative, always complain while they have everything necessary for normal living, find life purpose in posting pics and statuses on facebook(mostly trying to convince others they're happy with themselves), or drinking long into the night. Don't get me wrong, I know how to relax, but I don't wanna make it my lifestyle. People like that surround me, and I can spend a lot of time with them, but those relationships don't fulfill me. I know what you're gonna say: join a club or activity you enjoy and you'll find like minded people. But since I'm living in a small town, my favorite sports and activities are not available, and they'll have to wait for about 2yrs when I move out to go to college I tried other sports/activities even if they're not really my passion, just to occupy myself with sth, and stay fit. But I had to stop dancing (jazz dance,breakdance) because of injury at the age of 13. It took it 3 yrs to heal completely, but now I can't really join anything cause my peers are already training for many yrs and I would have to play with kids 5 yrs younger... The only thing that's left for me here is football (yeah I'm a girl). I used to play it a lot when I was a kid, I loved it, but never really thought about joining a club,(at that time I was pretty much worried what would my family and friends say). Now I accidentally got to know girls' team coach(ironically we were together on a physiotherapy) , and she told me I could join if I wanted, she'd put me in my age group. I've been thinking a lot about it recently, and I don't know. I'm kind of scared cause it's a rough sport and I could get injured again, and because I met so many people and just can't click with them for some reason . (It's really exhausting always being different). On the contrary a smile crosses my face when I remember how I used to play it often with classmates, and how I enjoyed every second of it. Any advice how to improve my situation, with or without football ?? Is it problem in me, or in my perspective? Thanks you shouldn't worry about what others may think about you joining football, this is how i determine friends.......acceptance, if they accept that i like different things to them and they are happy when i am happy, then, that makes them a friend...i shouldnt have to conform to what their ideal is....this goes with anything in my life......if they accept me for who i am flaws passions and all..... i will accept them exactly the same way and support them in any pursuit of happiness....life is too short to to be otherwise, i dont have loads of friends never have, dont need that to be happy. i have a few close friends and family all are supportive of me......you should chase your passion......if its football chase that ....if you dont know what you are passionate about be passionate in finding out what that is...do some research......take some time out and when something hits your heart really hard....chase it....seek it...get it I know i am seeking at the moment.....a few things have come into my life ......a church i love.......release from old thinking....i am still seeking not sure what direction to take .....i am working on my fitness plan on dropping more weight until i am happy with my fitness level passionately wanting to give up- smoking...its affecting me not having done that yet...in many ways...working on it.....i wrote down a list of goals and aspirations i have in a book....the first one i have is simple just to be happy more often and i always will be if i follow what i am passionate about ... so write a lsit of aspirations or goals that you have and chase them research what you dont know and i wish you happiness in all that you desire.....deb Edited December 25, 2012 by todreaminblue
MsSmurf Posted December 25, 2012 Posted December 25, 2012 Oh how I hated high school and couldn't wait to get out for many of the reasons you mentioned. One of the ways I managed to still connect with others was to meet people a little older than myself that had similar interests. Volunteering, church groups (I wasn't religious and was still welcomed), community college classes, and local museum/art/theater type events were all great opportunities for me to have fun and meet people. Being in a small town might make things more challenging especially if you don't have a car, but there must be young adults there that gather and do things that don't involve alcohol that you could participate in. Even if that something doesn't instantly grab you, check it out and you may be surprised.
Author sweet_cumquat Posted January 7, 2013 Author Posted January 7, 2013 you shouldn't worry about what others may think about you joining football, this is how i determine friends.......acceptance, if they accept that i like different things to them and they are happy when i am happy, then, that makes them a friend...i shouldnt have to conform to what their ideal is....this goes with anything in my life......if they accept me for who i am flaws passions and all..... i will accept them exactly the same way and support them in any pursuit of happiness....life is too short to to be otherwise, i dont have loads of friends never have, dont need that to be happy. i have a few close friends and family all are supportive of me......you should chase your passion......if its football chase that ....if you dont know what you are passionate about be passionate in finding out what that is...do some research......take some time out and when something hits your heart really hard....chase it....seek it...get it I know i am seeking at the moment.....a few things have come into my life ......a church i love.......release from old thinking....i am still seeking not sure what direction to take .....i am working on my fitness plan on dropping more weight until i am happy with my fitness level passionately wanting to give up- smoking...its affecting me not having done that yet...in many ways...working on it.....i wrote down a list of goals and aspirations i have in a book....the first one i have is simple just to be happy more often and i always will be if i follow what i am passionate about ... so write a lsit of aspirations or goals that you have and chase them research what you dont know and i wish you happiness in all that you desire.....deb Thank you for your response and wishes ! I wish you to achieve all your goals and live happy..
Author sweet_cumquat Posted January 7, 2013 Author Posted January 7, 2013 Oh how I hated high school and couldn't wait to get out for many of the reasons you mentioned. One of the ways I managed to still connect with others was to meet people a little older than myself that had similar interests. Volunteering, church groups (I wasn't religious and was still welcomed), community college classes, and local museum/art/theater type events were all great opportunities for me to have fun and meet people. Being in a small town might make things more challenging especially if you don't have a car, but there must be young adults there that gather and do things that don't involve alcohol that you could participate in. Even if that something doesn't instantly grab you, check it out and you may be surprised. THanks a lot! I'll try out your advice-- have a nice day
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