viciouscancer Posted August 15, 2004 Posted August 15, 2004 this girl who i am trying to get with. i called her a few times and we had a few good conversations. she never wants to hang out though, because she has a b/f. and she just stopped returning my calls, so i left it alone. i saw her at my best friends party. and i asked her why she avoids me and doesnt want to talk anymore. she says, im way too aggressive and i come on too strong and she said she has a boyfriend who she has been with for 2 years. so i left her alone. then this is the weird part for me. i tryed talking to one of her cute friends, and she jumps in my conversation with her talking about how this girl is her best friend in the world. i dont know what to think about this. she showed me she didnt like me because she doenst return my calls and tells people im aggressive. so why does she jump in my face for trying to talk to one of her cute friends? if she wasnt interested shouldn't she be happy to get off my back to talk to someone else. also, if she didnt want to be around me, why would she come to my best friends party where she 100% knew i was going to be there? can anyone explain this? viciouscancer
BurningBright Posted August 16, 2004 Posted August 16, 2004 That’s the first thing I would think of also. The jealousy factor and that the person does really like you. ALTHOUGH, if I were to do this to a good friend, it would be because I would want to protect her. Since she already stated that she thinks you are a aggressive individual, maybe she doesn't think you would be good for her friend, or would try to hurt her in some way. Maybe they had set a rule that night. Ie. “If any guy tries to pick me up, get me away from him”. My girls and me do that all the time at clubs and parties, especially on nights where we just want to have a girl’s evening, and avoid the “hunting male” She already told you that she has a bf, and that she is not interested. So I would not think of this as the jealousy factor. If you are crushing on a girl in her “group”, wait for the girl to approach you. This can help remove the aggressive quality that apparently you portray (not saying aggression is a bad thing . It can get to be too much though. ) ~BurningBright
treegirl Posted August 16, 2004 Posted August 16, 2004 Weird. I think she likes you, but feels that she shouldn't coz she's been with her boyfriend for 2 years and then when you talk to someone else... she gets all jealous. She badly wants to be honest with you but knows it's wrong.... Sticky situation...... Love TreeGirl xoxo
stop it Posted August 16, 2004 Posted August 16, 2004 IMO, she just watching out for her friend. She doesn't wan her friend to go what she went through with you.
Author viciouscancer Posted August 16, 2004 Author Posted August 16, 2004 i just told her friend i remebered her from a place she was at. i didnt even know her name. i never talked to her before. i never came onto her friend ever. she was the one who came to the party. i only usually talk to the one girl i liked. i dont even know the other girls names. thats about it. but that one girl said i was aggressive i knew her longer than her b/f did. she gave me her number twice before. and i never called her. then a year later i saw her again and actually talked to her. she treats me like i murdered her mother and stuff. she treated me bad for no reason. she is just a stuck up bitch i think. and just felt the need to cock block me for some odd reason, i still dont know. i wasnt even trying to mack it to the other girl. before the party i havent talk to her in 6 months. i saw her at her graduation and i didnt say a word to her. she decided to come to the party that same day i saw her, knowing i would be there. if she was hating on me why would she even show up.? viciouscancer
BurningBright Posted August 16, 2004 Posted August 16, 2004 Why would she not show up? Why should she not go to a party just because you will be there??? I've gone to parties where I knew some people would be there that I don't particularly like, but I don't put my life on hold for them and avoid going to certain places/events because they will be there. Don't worry about it. Let her live her life, and go live yours. ~BurningBright
DerangedAngel Posted August 27, 2004 Posted August 27, 2004 can anyone explain this? Well, no. But: 1). She has a boyfriend. She doesn't return your calls. Let's just assume she doesn't like you, like you thought. Leave her alone, like you claim you have been. 2). So what if she jumped into the conversation? I'd just about bet you misinterpreted it as some jealous behavior when it was nothing. Even if it was something, go back to one. Leave her alone. 3). If you want to pursue her friend, that's your business. Good luck. 4). It is only necessary to post your questions once. Most people browse LoveShack by checking the "New Posts", not the individual forums. Okay? Okay. Thanks. -Deranged
Jennasmiles Posted August 27, 2004 Posted August 27, 2004 Maybe she doesn't like you to the point where she wants to look out for her friends also. She might think your way to aggressive for her friend too. Doesn't sound like she wants anything to do with you. What did you do to turn her off like this?
Author viciouscancer Posted August 31, 2004 Author Posted August 31, 2004 ok, people listen to this one. i made a phone call at 6:00 am in the morning while at work to that girl who said i was aggressive and stuff... she didnt pick up her cell phone. so i figured that she would not call me back. then at about 11:30 while im still at work my cell phone range. it was her, bur i didnt pick it up, because my heart started racing and i was a little scare of what she would say and what i would say to her. so for a half hour i was thinking of something to tell her. all of a sudden my phone rang again and it was her. the girl who ignored my call all the time nad called me aggressive. she said my name? i answered and i told her: "i didnt mean to call u this morning, i was trying to reach my cousin". i told her" i kno u dont like me and u dont want me calling you anymore. and i dont want to make u feel uncomfortable" (i said this in a sad, and nervous voice.. then i said i dont want to make u mad or anything. she said why would i be mad? i dont hate u she said". she knew i was nervous and she said its ok u called me, i dont mind at all. very un usual for her to treat me good... then i told her i was at work and i told her im extremely sorry again for calling. and she said u can't talk to me? after she said that i was like WHAT?? i couldnt believe what i was hearing. she wanted to talk for a while>>>> but i told her " i have to go, maybe ill see u around sometime" ( but i didnt say i would call u later)>>>>she got completely silent,, and i said hello, are u there? and she wouldnt answer back, but i could here her breathing on the phone. so i said im sorry for bothing u again. and i hung up. it is weird or what?? can anybody explain this to me now?? this same girl ignored my calls, said i was aggressive, and then blocked me from even talking to her friend, who seemed pritty interested in me. why do women act like this??? Viciouscancer
johan Posted September 1, 2004 Posted September 1, 2004 Don't analyze it. You'll never know why. And try not to waste your time with women who have boyfriends anymore. EDIT: What I mean is, you can't count on a woman who has a boyfriend to act consistently nice toward you. And trying to win her away from her boyfriend is bad plan. She may be ready to leave him, but chances are you won't be the one she goes to. She'll choose someone who shows more respect.
Bart_Weisser Posted September 1, 2004 Posted September 1, 2004 this girl who i am trying to get with...and she just stopped returning my calls ... i tried talking to one of her cute friends, and she jumps in my conversation with her talking about how this girl is her best friend in the world...can anyone explain this? I agree with the majority of the posters that a) the girl (the one with the 2-year bf) doesn't like you at all, and b) she dislikes you, to the point that she doesn't want you "bonding" with her friends It's not a matter of her protecting her friends' interests. She's simply being selfish and is shutting all doors for you because she thinks you're too low even for her friends. This is a hard nut to crack, because, from what you said, this she has already accepted your "friend's" opinions and won't budge. The odds are against you, I am afraid to say. I know this will not be the most popular option, but sorry, mate, sometimes people are just that vicious and the only thing we can do is to take our defeat gracefully and move on. BW. P.S. - A note on "niceness". Sometimes women are just being polite and are afraid to offend. I once had a lady friend who would say the nicest things to me (not that I am flattered or attracted to her, but we seemed to get along). When it comes to meeting her female friends, she would keep saying, "Bart, don't even think about hitting on her", as if I am some walking erection. I think this situation applies.
Author viciouscancer Posted September 1, 2004 Author Posted September 1, 2004 shows more respect? i always show her respect. how did i disrespect her in any way? i asked questions and left her alone. i didnt wvwn aske her if she is still with her b/f. maybe not. but i sure did anaylize this a little bit. she has weird behavior. anyone would be curious!! thanx anyway for responding. need more replies from maybe the women
Bart_Weisser Posted September 1, 2004 Posted September 1, 2004 thanx anyway for responding. need more replies from maybe the women Sounds like you're looking for a confirmation than an opinion. I know this is gonna be hard to do, but don't let your little head dictate you. We have all been your age, and we know how you feel. Unless you start thinking, no words will help. BW.
Author viciouscancer Posted September 1, 2004 Author Posted September 1, 2004 when her frind was around me after the situation occured. she was nice to me. i honestly dont think the odd are stack against me presonally. her friends seem to like me. but i dont bother them though. thanx to u too. vicous
Author viciouscancer Posted September 1, 2004 Author Posted September 1, 2004 also, talking about low ness. her boy friend is a 24 year old skinny crack smoking/ dealer with no education. the other girls date the same kind of guys. i am still attending college. EXTREMELY physcially fit. like ll cool j. im much better looking than all the girls b/f without a dout, clean and neat at all times. i dont think this is the case to be VERY honest. also why did she want to continue talking to me that day?. she liked my honesty when i told her i was interested in her, but she had a bf. it seems to me that her friends treated me nice and seem to try impresing me in ways. in fact they treat me much nicer trying to show me in a way., that this girl isnt the only one out there who likes me. before this party i talked to the friend, and she was real nice, and the way she looked at me and ignored all my friends giving them mean looks trying to show no interest. i never wenr up the the friends in the first place because i thought they didnt have interest in me. showed me she was interested. in fact this girl didnt even tell her best friend i talk to her and her other friends that day in there room. she found out at the party and was shocked that her friend would go behind her back and talk to me. (she might have told them she had me on hold and nobody can talk to him). me and the other girl were talking again and the girl i was talking to jumped after the one girl said " this is my best friend". im telling u guys, its easy to say stuff when u dont have all the clues, it much more confusing than u guys think. im really serious, that is y i always ask about it. i like ur response though bro, it really made me think.,. KEEP EM" COMING EVERYONE!!!
Bart_Weisser Posted September 1, 2004 Posted September 1, 2004 VC: Last time I checked, college boys don't write like 15-year-olds. Y'know, we don't card people around here so you can be honest about who you are. You can say all you want about the situation in front of us, but you ain't fooling nobody but yourself. BW.
johan Posted September 1, 2004 Posted September 1, 2004 Talk about over-reacting. If you want good responses you'll keep control in the future. You can ignore any responses you don't like.
johan Posted September 1, 2004 Posted September 1, 2004 As far as my respect comment goes: some people consider it disrespectful to try to interfere with someone else's relationship. Maybe you didn't mean it that way, but you have to think how her boyfriend would feel about your relationship with his woman. Also you might consider what she thinks of it. I'm not assuming anything about what happened between you. You know the facts. I'm just suggesting. It's better to take the high road in this case. Your emotional response to the little things she does make me think you care too much. Not to mention the fact that you posted here trying to get people to help you interpret it. You'd be better off finding someone else and letting her have her skinny crack smoker. If that's what she's into, then you probably don't have much chance with her anyway. Unless you're skinny and smoke crack.
Author viciouscancer Posted September 1, 2004 Author Posted September 1, 2004 i understand what ur saying about the respect thing with the bf, and how he would feel. but i already had problems with him 2 years ago, he and his friends beat up my friend outside a bar. thanx alot john, i like ur advice. if things dont turn around that is exactly what im goin to do. thanx again for ur help and having some respect bro, viciouscancer
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