punisher Posted December 25, 2012 Posted December 25, 2012 19 years of marriage ripped apart - all for what ? Santa is making his list tonight as many of us sit and cry. I have decided to make a list as well. CLICK TO VISIT: www.IamThePunisher.com 1
Author punisher Posted December 26, 2012 Author Posted December 26, 2012 Sometimes it gets better. But it always seems to return - the anger. I do not like who I have become. She says she loves me and wants to be a good wife. She says she is sorry and it was a mistake. Why didn't she like me like this when I was a good guy I ask myself. ... I know it's just the world we live in and the system that tears people apart and destroys families. 20 years of work and commitment and she tosses it away for a drunk down the road ? Who is this women that I thought was my friend. She says she did and always has loved me. 10 months now since I found out and have been trying to work it out. We have found that wondreful place a couple of times along this journey where all is better than ever and thought "what a recipe for true love! crazy to think such good can come from such bad". But then ... it all comes back to me like a wave ... and when I open my mouth and say his name (or other triggers as you know) ... it's like fuel for the fire. What is real. What is fake. I could tell the whole story here but for what!? To compare my devastation to yours ? Maybe to heal ? Who knows. Some here understand (I think) what I am going through. Is it too late to give up even after 10 months of trying ? Is it just the holiday season that is killing me (19 wonderful christmas together with kids = not enough ?)
BetrayedH Posted December 26, 2012 Posted December 26, 2012 Personally, I don't think it is ever too late to decide that infidelity is a dealbreaker. In fact, I think it can take a long time to make such a decision and if you threw your M away without a second thought, I might question how much you valued your marriage in the first place. Maybe that's going to far but I do respect those that at least give reconciliation a shot. But if you cannot stand it and end up leaving, that's not on you; it would be a consequence of her actions. One guy here has been at it for 20 years and is still plagued. The poor guy still doesn't know what to do. One thing I can tell you is that there IS life after divorce. It has taken me a year of separation but I am finally at a point where I am grateful to be free of my ex wife. It took me all this time to really gain a different perspective altogether. I am now convinced that my second life is going to be better than my first. By the way, I was with my wife for 19 years as well. Try to find yourself some peace.
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