ann2020 Posted December 23, 2012 Posted December 23, 2012 My boyfriend broke up with me about 5 weeks or so ago. We were dating for 2 and a half years. The two years we were dating we went to the same school the 6 months he moved away to CA for graduate school. He said that he just needed space and breathing space. He said he needed to do this for his career and he didn't want to be in a committed relationship at the moment. He said he still loved me and cared about me a lot and that would never change. He also said that he wanted to remain friends with me. He also said that if he was ever dating someone else that didn't want me in his life then he didn't want the date them. He was upset when we broke up too and both of us were crying. Part of me thinks that the friend thing and the whole dating someone else thing is not real and he is just saying that but I'm not sure. He broke up with me in person and we then proceeded to see each other for the next 4 days. On the last day we went to the movies and got lunch. He told me that there was on one else and he just wanted to focus on his career. He said that he always wanted me in his life as long as I wanted to be in it. After the movies I started no contact because I realized being his friend is just not a possibility. I can't be friends with someone that I love. After about 2 weeks I caved in and I texted him and he said he's sorry he hasn't talked he is just busy. About 3 hours later I saw that someone was added to his skype account and yahoo account. I asked him if there was someone else and he still said no. She was just a friend. The girl is friends with his sister and lives in florida. So there is no way that he is going to start a relationship with her. It would be impossible. I think she is just an ego boost for him. I started to get upset and I said some things that I regret and I said that I hated him and all of this other stuff.We rarely fought in our relationship probably 4 times at the most and we were always happy with each other. He said that he wanted to be left alone and we both just need to try to move on. We decided that we weren't going to talk for 6 months. Is he just hiding his feelings and is denying that he loves me? He said when we broke up that he can't give me the time that he wants to give me because he is so busy. I deleted him off of every social media site (FB, Twitter, Instagram, etc..). Our relationship statuses were hidden on Fb for awhile. He recently deleted all of the pictures of us on FB even though he said he wanted to keep them up. Did he do this because he moved on? Or did he do it because he can't bear to think of us happy again and it makes him upset? Did he do it because he already moved on? I ended up deleting everything also. I also blocked him on everything instead of just defriending him.I changed my FB status to single but his still remains hidden apparently. Does no contact really work? Do people really reach out after no contact and realize that they miss the person even after a fight? Do we ever have a chance at getting back together? Or is my situation hopeless?
ellieryan85 Posted December 23, 2012 Posted December 23, 2012 To me, the career thing is just an excuse. Plenty of people have functioning relationships while they work towards their goals. Maybe he really meant the friends and girlfriend thing when he said it, but his feelings on it might change. I would assume there is a different reason he broke up with you. He might just be confused or need some space. I wouldn't wait for him though as it sounds like you're investing too much into the past relationship now. He might have deleted the pictures because he still is into you, but he can't get over you with them there. Good luck. Just try not to think of him and don't get in touch for a while. 1
Author ann2020 Posted December 23, 2012 Author Posted December 23, 2012 It's hard not to think about when we've invested a lot of time into our relationship. It also doesn't help that his mom told me after we broke up how much she loved me and considered me a daughter and wants to stay i contact no matter if I'm with him or without him. His school is done in May and then he has no idea where he is going from there. Do you think his sisters friend has anything to do with all of this? Do you think one day he will realize what he lost? Can giving him the space that he wants actually help us have a relationship again in the future? Is no contact the way to go? He said that he wants me in his life no matter what. This is all just confusing. My friends say that this is not normal for a breakup what he is saying. His best friend's gf also told me that there wasn't anyone else and he just wanted to focus on his career and he couldn't give me the time that I deserved.
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