SharkTooth Posted December 23, 2012 Posted December 23, 2012 It's been about 7 weeks since my ex broke up with me. It was not completely a shock and was an amicable break up. Like a few days after we broke up she would text questions about this or that. I would answer her right away, an hour, 2 days, sometimes never. I'm not a big phone person. Anyway, she was cool when we were together if it took me hours to get back to her but I always got back to her the same day. I've noticed now, like when we were together, that she tells (text) me more then her friends or faster then her very close friends and family about day to day or even serious things. I think I have gotten her in trouble because some friends didn't even know some things I knew. Anyway, she has now started asking "if I received her text" because I don't reply within the same day like before. I have gone on trips, not answered her for days, and then say I was out of town. She wants to know how the trip was and I will keep it very short or don't answer at all. What is that all about? Does anyone use the keep in contact and then answer whenever you can? Like between right away and never?
Appleness Posted December 24, 2012 Posted December 24, 2012 She's throwing you breadcrumbs, Sharktooth... Look, I've been there. One of my issues with my ex was that he would never tell me anything (ever). I went to a party to find out that one of his friends had a baby and he never said anything. He even went to the baby shower and everything but when I joked about her gaining weight and all, I looked like a total b*tch when she turned and picked up her 10 day old son. Following the break up, he started telling me everything every time we met. Who quit there job at his work. He's currently working out. What his holiday plans are. But it doesn't matter to me, just like it should matter to you. All of these things are no longer your business. What good is someone who won't share these events with you until they've pushed you away. I think you may even be getting friend-zoned without knowing it. The less you know, the better. If she gets comfortable enough telling you her day-to-day stuff, it's not such a far leap to start telling you about guys she's interested in. Or worse, she doesn't tell you but everyone else knows and assumes you do too because hey, she tells you everything, right? Do what you think is best, but if I were you, I'd keep ignoring her. Move on with your life and live well. If she calls or tries to tell you stuff, laugh and say "hey, I'm kinda in the middle of something. Can't talk now." Work on getting over her so you don't analyze what she's doing or thinking. This is stopping you from moving on. Heal yourself and Good luck.
Author SharkTooth Posted December 24, 2012 Author Posted December 24, 2012 Thanks Appleness...It makes perfect sense and I'm pretty much there. I do have another dilemma...She had a piece of jewelry made for me for my birthday/Christmas gift and wants to give it to me Christmas day.... Cost: $500. I kind of don't want to except it. I'm not sure I would wear it. What do you think? That's a pretty big bread crumb for a friend
Renard99 Posted December 24, 2012 Posted December 24, 2012 If you feel uncomfortable with it then tell her you can't accept it. Say to her that, whilst it was amicable, you are in fact still 'broken up' and a gift of such magnitude feels innappropriate. You need to establish where the boundaries are between you, whether that means total no contact or whether you remain friends but lines to need to be drawn.
Appleness Posted December 27, 2012 Posted December 27, 2012 It's not a big breadcrumb. It's a small breadcrumb with a $500 guilt trip ticket attached. Think about it. If you wear it, you'll think of her when you see it or when someone asks/ compliments you on it. If you don't wear it, it's going to sit in a drawer and she gets to whine "but I got that really expensive thing for you..."
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