Slite Posted December 22, 2012 Posted December 22, 2012 It's a long story, but I beg for your help... I'm desperate It all started at the first day of school (Im 18) I met this girl and we dug each other, she said that I was prettyIntelligentt and cute too, and that finding those 2 on one single guy is quite hard. Eventually I asked her to go out, but she, at first, hesitated, saying that she was in an open relationship with a guy. Then she asked me if we were supposed to date, would we only dateeach otherr and no one else? Of course I was shocked but answered accordingly : "If I like you, of course I only want You and don't want YOU making out with other guys"Eventuallyy we went out and she agreed dating me on an exclusive relationship. All was fine, but she started having strange behaviors, starting with lying about her virginity, when she's had threesomes, stuff really not meant for a couple, sayings like: "I was asked you to betray you yesterday. Oh really? Yeah, but the guy wasn' that great so, I turned him down... not that I would break up with you anyway ^^" and "(...) and of course, If I ever find some one who's best than you I'd break up with you and be with him. Huh?? Hey you wanted an exclusive relationship" And some more. At one point she started acting weird, one whole day without us kissing or even touching. Eventually she said she was with "family problem" which I belived 0%, BUT pretended to belive ... then She was really... you know cold. I went to speak witha friend of her, not a very close friend, a Friend none the less, and asked her if something was happening to her (And of course if there was another guy), she explained to me that the fact that we being together for 2 months was a really big feat for her, who never had a boyfriend, and that I was, maybe, too protective. she advised me to talk to her, that day. I asked her not to mention anything on my girlfriend. I spoke with her some time after and she said that the "cutness" couldn't last so much, cause she wa not used to it (she thought guys as tools, she said that to me, she made me belive she had a bad XpeExperienceth guys maybe raped or abused) and that she was like the seasons, but said that it was happy with the relationship. (this was at the end of the first term) On the msn she said that she spoke with her friend and told me that I shoshouldn'tve done that, that she didnt like that fact that I exposed our private douts and stuff like that, and that she was not cheating on me, that I should have talked to her. I said I was sorry, and explained her that I did it because I liked her and I had a fear of betrayal. Eventually, one day, she asked me out, I was happy cause I was the one that had asked her out all the time. She wanted to go to the cinema. We met at the zone, and she was with a (SUPPOSED) sad face (think she faked it) said hi, Kissed eachother and then she sat and said " I think we should break up..." I was shocked and obviouslly asked why, and if she didnt like me anymore. She said she liked me (yes we never actually said eachother I love you but we made clear that that was what we felt) but didnt want to be part of a relationship, just because of that. I sat there, nealy crying, but holding. She KISSED ME AFTER WE BROKE UP, didnt even got time to turn the face, and petted me. I said that she realiseed that I'd never speak to her again, she noded (with a rather tone of astonishment though). I said i was leaving, she said merry christmas, and I said you too.. The same night she texted me again, regretting her decision, saying that she wanted me... I picked a spor for us to meet and played a little hard to get, but everything went well and we were back, so we decided to take a walk, we talked nice and casually... but then, something like 2H later... we reached a park wehere we sat... and all of the sudden she became all thinkative and serious... I asked her "Do you regret coming back...?" she answered " I don't... know"... and started crying her heart out... she kissed me, and hugged me really tight... and... I asked her, finally if she love me, she tried to turn her face but i wouldnt let her, then she noded... she said that without me she felt loss... with me she felt she was another person, and that makes her feel bad... I tried to give ehr time to think about it, but she declined saying that it was no use, and it wouldnt be fair to me anyway... (i made clear that that was the alst chance I'd give her and that , to me she'd become a stranger ps: I didn't cry tho i was trembling) I stood up and said, Im going, Message me tonight... and left. I went home and cried like a maniac, her sms was : "I know it's no use,,, but Im really sorry.. I can't. be happy. You will always be my first everything..."... I told her" You've made your decicion. I hope you won't regret it." And then she said: "Bye" I some time after, called her, saying that Im sorry I was to harsh with her since she was so confused and how much i cared, and if she wanted, one last chance would be granted. she said thanks,,, but she didnt seem sad... What can I do? i don't want to lose her... we're on highschool together, same desk, with some unfinished works to present... Really... what can i do... I never loved so much some one before... and her eyes weren't lying when she said all that... I'm desperate
Amelie1980 Posted December 22, 2012 Posted December 22, 2012 Dude you're 18. We've all been there. Don't waste your youth on this. you will get over it. wait until you're 34 like me and break ups hit you a million times harder as there might be no time left to meet that special person. Stay strong, head held high, you have a lot of people to meet. first love always hurts like hell but you'll be ok.
Author Slite Posted December 22, 2012 Author Posted December 22, 2012 Dude you're 18. We've all been there. Don't waste your youth on this. you will get over it. wait until you're 34 like me and break ups hit you a million times harder as there might be no time left to meet that special person. Stay strong, head held high, you have a lot of people to meet. first love always hurts like hell but you'll be ok. Thing is, this ain't my first love, it's the one I most enjoyed and kinda pisses me off that it ends over something like "I can't be in a relationship". I know I'm 18, but i reckon the pain is shared at any age, or, as you say, it gets worse, but it hurts nonetheless. Thanks for your help :3, that is indeed my thought at the moment, I'm still young, but, as normal (I think) I can't get this over my head, happaned yesterday, and I feel like nothing. :'/
Amelie1980 Posted December 22, 2012 Posted December 22, 2012 Of course it hurts as you liked her the most. I Just broke up with a guy I liked the most: he's not in a good place for a relationship either. it does hurt so badly.
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