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STILL making contact 3 yrs later


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Posted

i posted this in the dating forum but i think it probably belongs here?

 

anyway, was with this guy for about 6 yrs, he cheated on me twice (relationships with other women, not just one-time mistake things) and i ended up leaving him. things didnt exactly end on a good note.

 

one of these other women actually contacted me christmas 2009 to tell me about their relationship.

 

me and my ex dont talk anymore and he is usually in a relationship or 3 at any one time as far as i am aware. i am over him now after a long 3 years of trying to move on. but every year, he sends me cards. christmas, birthday, and valentines day cards. wtf??? i dont send him anything so i find this weird behaviour considering he couldnt be bothered to do this while we were together.

 

i asked him to stop contacting me and my family last year - he stopped contacting them but always sends me cards still.

 

arghhh im just frustrated, despite for the most part feeling over him, this stuff really knocks me for six. im going out tonight, and ill probably get obliterated drunk now. arrgghhh.

Posted

Is there a way to change your mailing address or get an order to make him stop? He sounds nuts...I mean crazy. I feel for you.

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Posted
Is there a way to change your mailing address or get an order to make him stop? He sounds nuts...I mean crazy. I feel for you.

 

well we live about 150 miles apart so im not scared or anything. i will certainly look into it though. i just dont understand why he insists on doing this. these cards are signed from the cat as well as him.

Posted

Can I have your address Anabelle? So I can order you a giant "RETURN TO SENDER" stamp in 72 font, red ink?

 

Don't open his cards. Don't accept them. Return them to sender. Let him know that those cards are not welcome. Believe me, in his sick mind, he's probably thinking that he's doing you a favor. How would you feel if he's sitting there thinking "well, if I don't send her a card for her birthday/Christmas/Other-holiday, then no one will because she'll never find anyone else.

 

Seriously, unless there is money in those cards then do yourself a favor: return them!

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Posted
Can I have your address Anabelle? So I can order you a giant "RETURN TO SENDER" stamp in 72 font, red ink?

 

Don't open his cards. Don't accept them. Return them to sender. Let him know that those cards are not welcome. Believe me, in his sick mind, he's probably thinking that he's doing you a favor. How would you feel if he's sitting there thinking "well, if I don't send her a card for her birthday/Christmas/Other-holiday, then no one will because she'll never find anyone else.

 

Seriously, unless there is money in those cards then do yourself a favor: return them!

 

i dont know how return to sender works when theres no return address? anyway i should probably just bin them without reading them. i did tell him to knock it off last year but he still sends them. ugh.

Posted

Can you get a restraining order out in him? Maybe then he'll get the message? If a dumpee did this that's what they would get and laughed at.

Posted

Unless he's a lawyer or someone in the legal profession, try and call his bluff by writing to him stating that you wish for him to:

 

'cease and desist writing cards as, having previously asked you to stop, I now view this as harrassment. I am, therefore, seeking legal advice as to where I stand on this matter. If you do not conform with my wishes you will be hearing from me or my lawyer in due course'

 

Of course, you're not doing anything like it but often the threat is enough to shock people. I suggested this to a friend and it actually worked for her. Might be worth a try!

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