Cheated on girlfriend of 3 years! !

[ImSoStupid]

i relized i posted in the wrong thread sorry!

 

im 21 and she is 19. my girlfriend, "A", and I have been dating for three years. everything has been amazing in our relationship., she is beautiful, sexy, intelligent, trusting, funny, ect anything a guy could want in a girlfriend. our sex life was amazing shes also kinky as hell so things never got boring. ive been in love with her for five years (yes before we even started dating) the only negative thing about her is that sometimes she lacks the loving passion i want/need. this is due to her crappy past though. i love her she is my bestfriend.

 

well, at the end of october i had to go down south, 6+ hours away, and be with my family, im still here, because of stuff going on. this is the longest i have been away from her. I only got to see A for one weekend since ive been gone. im used to seeing her everyday and at least having sex 5/7 days a week.

 

there is a girl i work with, "H", and she is very pretty and fun to be around. our families are close to one another and this is the first time ive met her. well, we started out talking and just hanging out as friends and by the end of it all, we've had sex three times. first time we were both drunk, the other two times we were just horny. she is completely different from "A" but i feel nothing for her.

 

on the one weekend i went to see "A", we only had sex one time cause i felt so guilty, this upset her but I felt so much guilt.

 

 

after i went back home, a few days later i finally told "A" what had happened. she was heart broken. I begged her to at least stay with me until I come back home to see her, which is tomorrow and she half heartily agreed to talk to me about it. I feel like shes already made her mind up to break it off.

 

 

i dont know what to do, i feel so much regret and i love A more than life itself. she means everything to me, I dont even know why I cheated on her! i just did. I literally dont know what I will do without her im afraid im going to lose her!

 

 

what should I do?

[Keenly]

Man you have some major damage control to do. First of all I have to start off by saying that you mentioned that sometimes "A" doesn't give you everything you need. Then you proceeded to make an excuse for her. Have you talked to her about that? I mean I bet if you brought it up ( Later... seriously don't do that any time soon ) you are really going to have to make it perfectly clear, and pretty damn convincing, that you messed up, it wont happen again, and that you really do love the crap out of her.

 

I don' have specific advice like saying " you know when I'm down to my socks what time it is " but I wish you the best of luck

[GLDheart]

Pretty selfish of you:

 

"My perfect girlfirend that gives me everything and is so perfect that I have been with for YEARS doesn't light my world on fire with crazy passion everyday so I screwed someone else that means nothing to me."

 

I'm all for reconciliation but in this case I really hope she kicks your ass to the curb.

[whichwayisup]

the only negative thing about her is that sometimes she lacks the loving passion i want/need.

 

this stood out to me. So, is this your reason (along with being horny and not having sex for a while) to have cheated on her?

 

Something is broken inside of you...Figure that out..Work on you, do counseling and show your gf that you are worthy of another chance.

Allow her the time and space to figure this out once you two have talked. Don't beg or grovel. Show her and tell her how awful you feel, how remorseful you are, apologize to her and tell her you'll earn her trust and faith back if she is willing to give you that chance.

 

The good thing is you felt so awful, you told her the truth. You confessed and didn't drag this out for months or keep it from her. She will respect you on some level for coming clean, even though it turned her world upside down and you crushed her heart.

 

you can't keep in touch with that other girl at all. That is done and she may not want you to work with her anymore.

Edited December 22, 2012 by whichwayisup

[2long]

I think you should apologize, but still say goodbye. You are not serious relationship material. You are both very young and have a lot 2 learn about commitment.

 

Ol' 2long

[ImSoStupid]

thanks for the replies everyone.

 

im back home for a few days now. i asked her if she would come over today and tlak it out with me. needles too say im heart broken now beyond belief.

 

when she got there, she ran and jumped into my arms and started kissing me; leaving me breathless . she looked so beautiful and smelled of my favorite perfume and her eyes were filled with so much love. one thing led to another and we 'made love', i say that cuz of the passion she actually used and all the 'love' she put forth, the tender touching, lack of 'kinky ****ery' as she calls it from that one book.

 

after we were finished i was telling her how happy i was that we were okay while she was getting dressed. she walked over, kissed me deeply and said "We're over, Chris." and left.

 

i dont know how to handle this

sorry to rant guys. i thought everything was fine because of her physical reactions but i guess not.

i just lost my entire world. i know iprobably got what i deserve.

 

 

BTW what I meant by passion was in sex she's more distant, submissive, and doesn't show a lot of emotion. she loves pain. haha

and to the guy that implied she may be lacking passion because she was cheating on me, she wasn't cheating, that's just how she's always been.

[18Years2Late]

thanks for the replies everyone.

 

im back home for a few days now. i asked her if she would come over today and tlak it out with me. needles too say im heart broken now beyond belief.

 

when she got there, she ran and jumped into my arms and started kissing me; leaving me breathless . she looked so beautiful and smelled of my favorite perfume and her eyes were filled with so much love. one thing led to another and we 'made love', i say that cuz of the passion she actually used and all the 'love' she put forth, the tender touching, lack of 'kinky ****ery' as she calls it from that one book.

 

after we were finished i was telling her how happy i was that we were okay while she was getting dressed. she walked over, kissed me deeply and said "We're over, Chris." and left.

 

i dont know how to handle this

sorry to rant guys. i thought everything was fine because of her physical reactions but i guess not.

i just lost my entire world. i know iprobably got what i deserve.

 

 

BTW what I meant by passion was in sex she's more distant, submissive, and doesn't show a lot of emotion. she loves pain. haha

and to the guy that implied she may be lacking passion because she was cheating on me, she wasn't cheating, that's just how she's always been.

 

My troll radar is pinging...

[ImSoStupid]

My troll radar is pinging...

 

I guess if you look at it that way she did get me pretty well.

[nofool4u]

i dont know what to do, i feel so much regret and i love A more than life itself.

 

If that were true, you wouldn't have cheated on her.

 

 

she means everything to me, I dont even know why I cheated on her! i just did.

 

Ok, you can just stop with the "I don't know why I did it" bulls***. You know why. You were horny, A was nowhere around and you WANTED to F this other girl. 3 TIMES I might add. Ya, 3 times and you didn't know why.

 

Point is, own it and quit trying to act like you had no control over what you did.

 

 

I literally dont know what I will do without her im afraid im going to lose her!

 

 

what should I do?

 

Leave her alone. Let her make up her mind how she wants to proceed without a guy slobbering all over her promising the moon that he can't provide so she can have a clear head while making a decision.

[angelsword]

im sorry bro but you blew it. she is right to leave. your better off for it because women never forget cheating. she would never fully trust you again. Move on and try not to repeat the same mistake. if you cant be faithfull to your women do not get into a serious relationship.