Once you've dated somebody; you can't be friends with them...just read it

[shanemike88]

I dated a friend for about a year. It was casual then turned into something a little more serious. However immaturity, games, and the yo-yo of being together/not being together took a toll on myself and I walked away from the whole situation. That was in May fast forward to now we only talk once in a while and it's mainly through text and she even has a new "boyfriend." Which sucks but hey things like that happen.

 

A few nights ago myself and a lady friend went to a local bar and the minute I walk in she's right there with her new boyfriend. She saw me and I saw her however neither of us had enough courage to say hi while we were pretty much in arms reach. The reason I didn't say hi because I felt awkward, here is somebody that I wanted to be with and was even falling in love with her yet for whatever reason we never could actually "get it together." I didn't think too much of the cold shoulder on her part because I understood why it happened that was until the next morning when I woke up to a text saying "thanks for ignoring me last night." I replied simply I didn't ignore you but you were with your boyfriend and its just awkward for me. I said for the same reasons you didn't say anything to me is the same reason I didn't say anything to you its just flat out awkward.

 

Yes we decided to remain friends but we've seen each other twice since May both times were in public and by coincidence. To finish this off I was confused by the whole early morning text because if it was so important to her she could've said hello to me. I feel like this "friendship" is slowly fading out.

[IT Geek]

I've found in some cases you can't really remain friends with someone who you ask out and then get turned down by, either.

[todreaminblue]

I've found in some cases you can't really remain friends with someone who you ask out and then get turned down by, either.

 

 

I can with difficulty....I swallow my pride and enjoy being with someone who obviously touched me......i cant date guys who dont....so its rare....and yes even though its difficult...i would rather see a person i care about than not.....the only way i truly can get over soemone is to go no contact or limited contact......this too me is very painful.......harder than being friends with soemone .....luckily it hasnt happened where it have remianed friends till now...i should correct myself ....i think he is the one who keeps his distance and doesnt want a friendship with me....i am talking to other guys.i am attempting to talk to other guys........it is difficult....but i am getting better....deb

[NateC]

I've found in some cases you can't really remain friends with someone who you ask out and then get turned down by, either.

 

Some cases you can't, but a lot of times it really is possible. Heck, I'm best friends with a girl who turned me down and she's seeing another guy (and I'm happy for her).

 

The important thing is to not really take it personally - s/he may just not be that into you, but many times this is just a unconscious decision. You can't force something to happen.