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Having really pretty friends ruins dating??


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Posted
The thing is if you read the post I think I mention that I need more confidence and that I have my own issues. Everyone on LS knows I have my own issues lol

 

Don't take this badly, but I'll tell you one thing.

 

I would never date you. Whether you were the one on the left or the right.

 

You're way too shallow.

 

And somewhere out there, there's a good looking, smart, funny, successful white guy who thinks the same.

  • Like 5
Posted
Thin guys are not as in demand as thin girls. That's the flaw in your logic. :D

Thin?

 

Girl look at the body

 

I work out

hey, SD make sure you take note of who liked your last post, you might learn something.

Huh?

 

I already know that ImperfectionisBeauty has a sense of humor and can take a joke. That's a great thing about her.

 

My whole point was that if I posted something similar to what I just did in a different thread, there would be no shortage of people attacking me.

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Posted
Don't take this badly, but I'll tell you one thing.

 

I would never date you. Whether you were the one on the left or the right.

 

You're way too shallow.

 

And somewhere out there, there's a good looking, smart, funny, successful white guy who thinks the same.

 

Well you are 1 in about a billion so luckily I won't die solely because you won't date me lol. I am not shallow but there definitely needs to be a slight attraction

Posted
Huh?

 

I already know that ImperfectionisBeauty has a sense of humor and can take a joke. That's a great thing about her.

 

My whole point was that if I posted something similar to what I just did in a different thread, there would be no shortage of people attacking me.

 

the point is she is it blaming our gender for her issues, and she isn't bitter about her lack of success, she just wants understand why it's happening. that's the number 1 reason the bitter brigade great gets ripped apart here on LS, because they blame other people for issues that are actually their own. like someone said earlier, most of us don't want to see you fail we'd actually like to see you succeed. in order for that to happen, you're going to have to learn to show some empathy, and be able to deal with the fact that some things are just going to naturally work against you.

 

from what I read of her posts, the OP that's pretty much done everything that everyone is telling you you need to do.

Posted

 

My whole point was that if I posted something similar to what I just did in a different thread, there would be no shortage of people attacking me.

 

Truth be told, I think what you posted is shallow as well. There's no need to call women fat and ugly. They're just not attractive to you.

 

If I heard a woman saying ugly guy this, and ugly guy that and I want the hottest, I'd be immediately turned off, no matter how hot she was.

 

But, I dunno. Judging from this thread, I guess that's just me.

 

More power to OP. :cool:

Posted

Okei, here comes my take on this.

 

I am a white guy and live in country where 95% of the people are white.

 

I think you are both (decent looking but nothing special like most people). I would never date black women, because they just do nothing for me, i don't find them attractive.

 

 

It's like this for many of my friends, i think being black woman going for hot white men will be disappointing. It's a huge disadvantage, so don't be mad that your friend does better.

 

It would like be a ugly guy getting mad that his male model friend gets more attention. Nothing you can do about it.

Posted

IB, like many others here I've always thought your main problem is the fact that you don't seem to have developed your sense of self very well, and that you're overall lacking in confidence. I still think you need to work on improving all that before continuing to date, as you will likely grow even more frustrated with the fruits of your labor (or lack thereof) without doing so. Men can smell insecurity from a mile away, and the bad ones will prey on it, leaving you feeling worse about yourself and having dug a deeper hole to climb out of.

 

Beyond that, as to your preference, your location is likely a problem. You've said you're in the midwest. Are you in a metropolitan area? If possible, consider moving to a big city. You're more likely to be successful there. Or try the east coast--even living in smaller cities I've had no problem meeting and dating men of all races since I began attending college.

Posted

Your friend is really beautiful. Maybe it's just my personal preferences but she is stunning. You're pretty too. Stop obsessing! I'm sure going out with her won't impact on your dating chances. There's plenty of single guys and love to go around :)

  • Author
Posted
Okei, here comes my take on this.

 

I am a white guy and live in country where 95% of the people are white.

 

I think you are both (decent looking but nothing special like most people). I would never date black women, because they just do nothing for me, i don't find them attractive.

 

 

It's like this for many of my friends, i think being black woman going for hot white men will be disappointing. It's a huge disadvantage, so don't be mad that your friend does better.

 

It would like be a ugly guy getting mad that his male model friend gets more attention. Nothing you can do about it.

You're comparing me to an ugly guy... Awesome

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Posted

:bunny:

Your friend is really beautiful. Maybe it's just my personal preferences but she is stunning. You're pretty too. Stop obsessing! I'm sure going out with her won't impact on your dating chances. There's plenty of single guys and love to go around :)

 

I mean she's pretty I said that but I mean I've known more pretty people... Bloop bloop maybe dating white guys just isn't going to work for me I should just go for the alone forever status -_-

Posted
So what you're basically saying is that you have a good physique. If you don't have an attractive face to go with it, you can spend all the time you want in the gym but that won't change your face. You're saying you want quality, good looking women, but if you don't bring that to the table yourself, then you should probably lower your expectations.

 

Ever heard of satire?

 

Now try again and address IB post

Posted
:bunny:

 

I mean she's pretty I said that but I mean I've known more pretty people... Bloop bloop maybe dating white guys just isn't going to work for me I should just go for the alone forever status -_-

 

You remind me of the Indian guys who only want to date white girls.

 

How about broadening your spectrum?

Posted
I'm still completely shocked by this post.

 

If I or any of the struggling men on this forum posted anything remotely similar to what she said, we would be absolutely torn apart.

 

Believe me, she's been torn apart many times. And whoever does it gets reported.

  • Author
Posted
You remind me of the Indian guys who only want to date white girls.

 

How about broadening your spectrum?

 

I'm just really attracted to white guys. If I met a guy of another race that I was attracted to though I would date him

Posted

I am a white guy and live in country where 95% of the people are white.

 

 

You don't live in the USA?

Posted
See that really bothers me though, I am black and I like to date white guys, I don't want ugly white guys I want quality good looking white men... Why does it have to be so hard? I mean white guys should like me and I look like I could be mixed so mixed people have the ability to date whoever and I act white I like country and stuff like that I have a lot in common with white people! I shouldn't have to just date black guys because I'm black.. I don't feel any attraction to black guys

 

Well … I understand that we all have preferences. Since you only feel attraction to white men, I'd think it would be easy to understand how there are men who only are attracted to white women.

 

You really are like the Indian guys in here that way.

 

It's disturbing to read that you think you "act white" and "have a lot in common with white people." It sounds like you are racist - against your own race, and it's sad.

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted
Well … I understand that we all have preferences. Since you only feel attraction to white men, I'd think it would be easy to understand how there are men who only are attracted to white women.

 

You really are like the Indian guys in here that way.

 

It's disturbing to read that you think you "act white" and "have a lot in common with white people." It sounds like you are racist - against your own race, and it's sad.

 

I mean I just like the way white guys approach me and stuff, I haven't met a black guy who isn't all hip hoppy and stuff I know that sounds bad but its true. If I met a black guy who wasn't stereotypical I would for sure date him but idk I'm pretty into interracial relationships and I am color struck kind of so I probably would only like light skinned or mixed black men. I feel like I just need a new location and new men who like black women or I could just say I'm mixed...!?

Posted

What is "acting white"? Being articulate? Enunciating when you speak? Having varied tastes in music? As a black woman, I find that so insanely offensive. Your issues are endless, it seems. And I hate to rain on your parade, but you are a brownskinned black girl and look like one (not mixed). Very sad that you would prefer to deny it.

  • Like 3
  • Author
Posted
What is "acting white"? Being articulate? Enunciating when you speak? Having varied tastes in music? As a black woman, I find that so insanely offensive. Your issues are endless, it seems. And I hate to rain on your parade, but you are a brownskinned black girl and look like one (not mixed). Very sad that you would prefer to deny it.

 

Guys ask me if I am mixed all the time so someone believes I could be. People have told me I am the "whitest black girl" they know and I don't have an issue with that. When I was younger black kids didnt want to be my friend because I was too white and I talked white... So I'm sorry it offends you but I didn't like it then and it seemed horrible that people would say that but think about it. How many black people like country and rock? Or how many go to country like dancing bars? Since I've been going I've seen 2 other than me.

Posted (edited)

The race stuff gets very interesting. It's pretty funny to fault her for liking white guys because she's not white. It's just as racist to say she should like black men because she's black (sort of black, considering I lived with a Ghanan man for 2 years).

 

For many blacks, thug or hip hop is the culture in the US. I don't blame her for not being attracted to that. I once visited a black "friend" when his 4 y/o boy ran up, shooting me with his toy gun, and yelling "kill the cracker!". I'm NOT sorry for refusing to be around people like that.

 

As a white guy, I'm not attracted to hillbilly trash either. Too bad if that offends people. I didn't shed a tear when a great uncle died who had once talked about "coons coming to rummage through a garage sale".

 

Oh and, both you girls are cute ;) And FYI, the hottest women in the world are mixed race.

Edited by PogoStick
  • Author
Posted
The race stuff gets very interesting. It's pretty funny to fault her for liking white guys because she's not white. It's just as racist to say she should like black men because she's black (sort of black, considering I lived with a Ghanan man for 2 years).

 

For many blacks, thug or hip hop is the culture in the US. I don't blame her for not being attracted to that. I once visited a black "friend" when his 4 y/o boy ran up, shooting me with his toy gun, and yelling "kill the cracker!". I'm NOT sorry for refusing to be around people like that.

 

As a white guy, I'm not attracted to hillbilly trash either. Too bad if that offends people. I didn't shed a tear when a great uncle died who had once talked about "coons coming to rummage through a garage sale".

 

Oh and, both you girls are cute ;) And FYI, the hottest women in the world are mixed race.

Thanks :) and mixed raced people are so beautiful

Posted

Is it often that black girls are into white men?

 

I find it that most of the girls that give me attention, approach me, etc., are black women. I am very flattered by this, but I also am not sure if this is a "thing," sort of like black dudes with white ladies.

 

Clarification requested.

  • Author
Posted
Is it often that black girls are into white men?

 

I find it that most of the girls that give me attention, approach me, etc., are black women. I am very flattered by this, but I also am not sure if this is a "thing," sort of like black dudes with white ladies.

 

Clarification requested.

 

I can't speak for every black woman lol but its just what I'm attracted to. I grew up in an all white community so its what I'm used to

Posted

Oh my, one of the worst things that women are capable of : jealousy. There are seeds of jealousy in what you said, and that's fine to feel jealous of someone or something to a degree. But know that jealousy can easily come between you and a lot of things before you know it, and please know that jealousy will make you blind with rage. Before you let it get out of control, do some major work on yourself to NOT BE JEALOUS. But I digress ...

 

Women seem to have more trouble with this than men do. Unfortunately for me, I have very few women friends due to the horror stories of jealousy from childhood on with others. The ones I do have are only so because they proved themselves to not be jealous of me or anyone else. I did also have a former woman friend who refused to introduce me to any of her friends because it would take away from her chances of meeting men. That's one of the reasons we are not friends anymore.

 

As for your situation, I would not take it too seriously what your new bf said about her. But know that the jealousy issue is there and it can and will creep up on you before you know it.

Posted
Is it often that black girls are into white men?

 

I find it that most of the girls that give me attention, approach me, etc., are black women. I am very flattered by this, but I also am not sure if this is a "thing," sort of like black dudes with white ladies.

 

Clarification requested.

 

I can't speak for every black woman either, but I know a few white men who have said this has happened to them, my current boyfriend included. Perhaps there are a lot of open-minded women where you live.

 

If you don't already, embrace it! :)

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